I'm What?
by Irish American 67
Summary: Near the beginning of Faith and Buffy's relationship, Faith makes a startling discovery about herself, and is hesitant to talk to Buffy about it, afraid it'll change how Buffy feels about her. Rated T for now, rating may change later.
1. Chapter 1

I'm... What?

AN: This story, at the present, is supposed to be a oneshot, but I'm not sure if I'll feel satisfied with it being only one chapter, so it may turn into a full story.

Summary: Takes place with teenage characters all the way around, other than the adults, obviously. Dawn and Buffy are actually TWIN sisters. No supernaturality of any kind. I've got one word for you: Fuffy! Near the beginning of Faith and Buffy's relationship, Faith makes a startling discovery about herself, and is hesitant to talk to Buffy about it, afraid it'll change how Buffy feels about her. I can already tell this is going to take more than one chapter, so just ignore the AN above. Hope you enjoy!

(Buffy's POV)

My name is Buffy Summers. I live in the small town of Sunnydale, California. My twin sister, Dawn, and I are both sixteen years old, and our parents just recently went through a pretty bad divorce. Other than our birthday, we have nothingin common. I'm tan, she's pale. I'm blonde, she's a brunette. I'm more of an athlete, in fact, I'm actually a gymnast. Dawn... well... let's just say, she's not exactly way up there on the popularity ladder.

One more difference... Dawn? She's into guys... I'm not. I'm gay. I've been openly gay since I was thirteen. I've had a grand total of one girlfriend since then, and it lasted a grand total of twenty-nine days, seven hours, ten minutes and twenty-three seconds. Then, I realized she was insane, so I broke it off with her. I guess the fact that she was LITERALLY counting every second we'd been together was a bit of a hint to that fact.

We used to live in Los Angeles, California, but because of the divorce, and the fact that my mom won the custody battle, we now live in Sunnydale. The move was terrible. I had lots of friends to say goodbye to. There were tears. Lots of tears. And Dawn just sat in the car the whole time, sulking because none of her FRIEND, not plural, came to say goodbye.

But, the living in Sunnydale part didn't turn out to be so bad. But I'll get to that.

...

The first day of school. Ugh, this was just bound to be "fun". I'm the new girl at school, so almost everyone is goingto be analyzing me to see where I fit in with the social chain. Sure enough, a girl named Cordelia Chase approached me and Dawn just as we walked in the door.

"Hi! I'm Cordelia! You two must be new here, right?" She asked, waayyy too peppy. She didn't give us a chance to answer. "Great, so, let me just show you around the campus!" I shrugged. At least she seemed nice. Be an opportunity to make some friends, at least. Dawn just rolled her eyes and walked away.

"Okay." I agreed.

"Great, so up the hall is Principal Wood's office." **[AN: I never liked Principal Snyder, but Wood was pretty cool, so I'm sticking with him.] **"There are the classrooms." She pointed down a few hallways. Cordelia spent almost an entire hour showing me around the campus before the morning bell rang, signifying that it was time for everyone to head to class.

"Hmm..." Cordy, she said I could call her that. Cordy groaned. "All that took a lot out of me. I need a drink." She said, and walked over to a water fountain with a redheaded girl bending over to take a drink.

"Move!" Cordy exclaimed. The girl flinched and backed away quickly, then turned and ran, like she was scared.

"What was that about? Something happen between you two?" I ask Cordy.

"Yeah, she came in and started invading my school." She said with a smirk. "Loser." She muttered under her breath.

_Oh, great. She's a bitch._

"Oh. So... you're _that_ kind of girl, huh?" I ask her. She turned slowly towards me.

"Excuse me?" Everyone within earshot stared at us, even the redheaded girl.

"You're the type of girl who thinks she's better than everyone else just because you're attractive, and becauseyou've got daddy's money behind you. You're a bitch." Everyone gasped when I said the "b-word".

"What did you call me?" Cordy said angrily.

"A bitch. And judging by the way that girl kind of slunk away like a frightened animal when you said move, I'm guessing you're the Head Bitch at this school, huh?"

We heard a lot of "ooohs" and whistles fromthe gathering crowd. One guy, standing next to the redheaded girl, brought out a video camera, like Cordy and I were about to tear each other's clothes off in some kind of cat fight. The redhead rolled her eyes and grabbed his camera, putting it back in his bag.

"Okay, _Buffy_, you've just made your worst enemy." Cordy said with a fake smile. "I will make your time here at this school a living hell from now until graduation day!" she whispered. After she left, the crowd dispersed and I had to hurry to catch up to the redheaded girl.

"Hey!" I said, tapping her on the shoulder. She flinched when she saw me there.

"Oh... h-h-hi." She stammered.

"You okay?" I asked her.

"Um... y-y-y-yeah?"

"Is that an answer or a question?"

"Come on,Will, she's trying to be nice!" the camera guy from earlier said, patting her on the back.

"Um... I... I'm f-fine." the girl said.

"I'm Buffy." I said, holding out my hand.

"W-Willow." She replied, shaking my hand slightly.

"So is Cordelia always this big of a bitch, or was that just a mistake?"

Willow snickered a bit, but didn't say anything.

"A little of both." The guy said. He took my hand and shook it before I even offered it. "I'm Harris. Xander Harris." He said with a smile, then made a finger gun and stored it in its "holster", his pocket.

"Summers. Buffy Summers." I replied, doing the same thing with my hand. His eyes went wide.

"You know James Bond?!"

"Well, I've heard of him. Never watched any of the movies, but I used to know a kid who was obsessed with them."

"Oh." he looked disappointed. Willow rolled her eyes. She looked like she was warming up to me bit by bit.

"So... This is Sunnydale High, huh?" I said out loud, looking around.

"Yup. Both the best and worst place on Earth to be. Well, mainly the worst. But it gets much better around here whenever Cordy gets cut down to size for the day." Xander said with a grin just as my eye caught on this small group of tough-guy types. All of them wore either dark jeans or leather pants, and either a black leather vest over a white or gray shirt, or a black leather jacket. Most of them were guys, but the one at the front was female. Very female.

She went all out. She was wearing tight leather pants tucked into black combat boots, a black leather jacket over a read v-neck shirt that left absolutely nothing to the imagination, leather gloves like you see bikers wearing in the movies, a chain around her neck, and very dark sunglasses. Another chain was hanging from a couple of belt loops.

"Oh that's Faith." Xander said, noticing my stare. Faith, of course, also noticed my stare when she turned her head to look at us after hearing her name. She smirked, then turned back around and kept walking without a second glance, though I swear she started swinging her hips a little more as she walked away. "She's the one that usually cuts Cordy down to size."

"Faith?" I whispered very subtly.

"Yeah. That's her name." Xander confirmed.

I barely heard him.I was too busy staring at the luscious backside of a very attractive girl in a leather jacket.

"So, Willow!" Xander said, trying to keep from falling into an awkward silence.

"Yeah?" Willow asked him, perking up when he talked to her. I turned my attention back to them.

"You going to the Bronze tonight? First day of school means no homework, right?"

"Oh. Yeah. Um... I guess I could go, you know, if you really want me to." It was obvious that Willow had feelings for him, and desparately wanted him to return those feelings.

"Oh, sure, Will! You know, we haven't hung outthere in a while. I'm kind of itching to get out of the house, you know?"

"Yeah." Willow smiled widely.

"Hey, Buff, can I call you Buff?" Xander asked, turning back to me again. "I kind of shorten all my friends' names, you know?"

"Oh, sure." I agree. Well, making two friends on the first day. Maybe this won't be so bad, after all.

"Great! So, you coming to the Bronze tonight?" He asked, and Willow's smile kind of faded. I didn't feel like it was because she didn't like me, it was just because she was hoping it would be just her and Xander.

"Um... nah. I'm supposed to help my mom finish unpacking. We just moved here." I said, a sideways glance throw towards Willow, and her eyes totally said "Thank you."

"Ah, bummer." He said.

"Well, we'd probably better get to class." Willow said. "The bell will be ringing soon, and I don't want to make a bad impression with the teacher on the first day." She said, and Xander smirked.

"Well, probably right."

"What's your first class, Buffy?" Willow asked.

"Um... Biology." I said, looking at my schedule.

"Oh cool!" She said. Obviously, she was warming up to me quite a bit. "Me too!" She said, and we started walking away, with her leading the way, of course.

"I've got History!" Xander shouted down the hall to us. "In case you were... nevermind!"

...

When we got to the classroom, I couldn't believe my eyes. I now knew three people in the same class as me. Well, technically, I only _knew_ two of them,but I recognized the third. Of course, Willow was one. Dawn was the other. Apparently, she had Biology first period, too.

But the third person... When she saw me staring at her again, she smirked, and I know that my blush made my face as red as her hair.

I quickly took my seat near the front of the room so I wouldn't have to look at her, and Willow approved of my choice in seats. Apparently, she was one of the academically-high-standing, likes-to-sit-at-the-front-of-the-class-to-impress-the-teacher types of girls. It always amused me.

"Great!" The teacher said, sounding as chipper as Willow was now coming across to me. "So, why don't we all take the time to get to know each other better. When I call your name, stand up and tell us something about yourself. For example, I am Mrs. Jarvis, no jokes please. And I really, really like the frog dissection part of this class. Good. Now... Tony barnett!" She call a name, and some kid stood up and said his name and gave a fact about himself.I did what most everyone does when this "event" comes around. I zoned out, because no one really wants to know what you have to say. Except when it comes to my turn, then everyone always perks up. I always like to surprize people. It's fun.

Finally, Mrs. Jarvis called Faith's name.

"Faith Lehane." Faith sighed and just sat up in her seat. She didn't stand up, just sat up.

"Yeah, whatever." She said, almost lazily. "I'm Faith and I like to screw girls." I flinched when she said that. That's what _I_ was going to say! Maybe not those exact words, but the message was the same!

But what really got me was the sudden realization the she was gay. And my breath caught.

Several wolf whistles were heard from around the room. I chanced a look. She was smirking and holdingher hands out all cocky, like she was inviting more whistles. I saw several girls scowling at her around the room. I'm assuming they were the girls Faith "screwed". Either that or uptight bitches who thinks gays are disgusting.

The room quieted down and Mrs. Jarvis read off the list again. I felt bad, but I even ignored Willow's ramble when her name was called. I was distracted by the feeling of Faith's eyes on the back of my head, like she was sizing up the new girl for a potential screw.

Then, it was my turn. I was so deep in my thoughts that Mrs. Jarvis had to call my name three times, or so Willow told me later.

"Oh, um... I'm Buffy Summers and..." I looked at Faith, who was staring back at me expectantly, like she already knew what I was about to say. "And yes, this _is_ my natural hair color." I said. I don't know why, but I had the sudden urge to defy Faith's voiceless command to come out. Like if I actually informed everyone that I'm gay, then they'd think I had the hots for Faith, and was just copying her to get her attention.

Faith raised an eyebrow in slight surprize when I avoided what she obviously already knew, then her eyes went to my hair, and nodded, like she was approving of my hair color.

"Dawn Summers." The teacher called once I sat down.

That one caught Faith by surprize. I could tell she was thinking "Wait, she has a sister?"

Dawn stood up like it was an inconvenience.

"I'm Dawn Summers, and unlike my sister, Buffy," she shot a sideways glance towards me, and I glared back at her, "I'm not gay." That got Faith to smile a bit. I think she was actually a bitdisappointed, like she thought maybe she'd been wrong about me, but with Dawn's confession, she was now certain she had me all figured out.

...

The rest of the day was basically spent with me hanging our with Xander or Willow in class, or with both of them if they both had the same class as me, as well as avoiding Faith.

Then, Willow and Xander decided to walk home with me and Dawn, mainly because they didn't want to go home, but also because they heard there might be the presence of sugar at the table waiting for Dawn and me.

"So what's Faith's deal?" I asked them. Dawn was walking about ten feet ahead of us. She was still mad at me for splitting Mom and Dad up, because it was my fault.

"What do you mean?" Xander asked. Willow grinned knowingly.

"Looks like our new friend here has a crush on the resident bad girl." Willow said. I blushed.

"What? No!" I denied.

"Wait, Buffy's gay?" Xander asked.

"Yes! She's gay! Get over it!" Dawn shouted.

Willow and Xander flinched slightly, startled, but quickly returned to the topic of my orientation.

"Oh, come on, Buffy, you know it's true." Willow teased. "You were staring at her all through Biology."

"What?!" I shrieked. "I was trying not to stare!" Then, I realized I'd fallen into her trap.

"Gotcha!" Willow said. Xander was off in daydreamland, obviously thinking about me and Faith together.

"Okay, fine. So... there might be the presence of some... attraction to Faith." I admit.

Willow's face got serious all of a sudden. "Okay, well... Just promise you won't, you know... try and get into a relationship with her."

"What?" I asked. "Why not? She taken?" I tease. "Besides, who said anything about a relationship?"

"Okay, good." Willow said.

"Wait, _why_ shouldn't I try and get into a relationship with her?" I asked Willow. Xander snapped out of his fantasy in time to answer.

"Let's just say she's been around and leave it at that."

"What? Come on, I need more than that." I say.

"Well..." Willow started. "She, um... She likes to get into... She likes to sleep around. She, um... She's... I think the term for Faith is "emotionally unavailable." She spends a lot of time getting to know a girl, and she's really good at making them feel special, like they're the only one that matters to her, then she finally gets into their pants, and she ditches them after she's done with them. It's like a game to her. See how many girls she can get to fall in love with her. She even turned a few straight girls gay, but they went back to the straight-and-narrow, if you know what I mean, once she was done with them."

"Yeah." Xander said with a scowl and a sideways glance towards Willow, who looked like she was in tears.

"Wait..." I stop and I look Willow in the eyes. "Willow, did... Did she do that to you?" I ask quietly.

"No." Willow said. "Not her... It... It was someone else. A guy. His... His name was... His name was Parker." She said, and the tears that had been welling up in her eyes fell down her cheeks.

"He was nice and charming. Hell, even I liked him. he was a good friend for a while." Xander said. "He got real close to Will, and... And she just gave herself to him. All of herself. And he just went and ignored her right after. Said it was just a night of fun."

"Gave herself... you mean...?"

"Yup." Willow said angrily. "I was a virgin. And I let him take me. All of me." She wiped her eyes and tried to laugh it off, but that's not something that one jokes about. "Anyway, my point is, Faith is just like Parker was. She likes to stand up for people, because she's had it kind of rough, but that's where the chivalry ends. Occasionally, she'll cut Cordelia down when she's picking on some girl, and Faith'll make it her mission to get into that girl's pants. And she always succeeds. And the girl's heart is almost always broken. A couple of the girls Faith's slept with are just like her, they just like to have fun, but most of them... They end up either dropping out or moving away."

"Ouch." I said, and I felt sick for Willow.

"Yeah, it's pretty harsh." Willow agreed, just as we were walking up the steps to my house.

...

"Hey, girls, how was school today?" Mom asked me and she noticed Willow and Xander with me.

"And who're your friends?" She noticed Willow's red face and realized she'd been crying. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing, Mrs. Summers." Willow said.

"Mom, this is Willow and Xander." I said, glancing over at Willow to make sure she was okay.

"Well, it's very nice to meet you." Mom said to both of them. "Willow, are you sure you're alright?"

"Yes, Mrs. Summers. Just a bit emotional today. First day of school and all." Willow deflected like a pro.

"Oh, I see. Well, please, call me Joyce. Mrs. Summers is my ex-mother-in-law." Mom smiled. "Well, kids, snacks are in the kitchen, help yourself, Dawn, I need to speak with you." Mom looked angrily at Dawn, who sighed and put down the brownie she'd picked up.

"Uh-oh." I said when my mom and Dawn were gone.

"What?" Xander asked.

"Apparently, the school's already called mom. I wonder what Dawn stole today?"

"What do you mean?" Willow asked, glad the conversation wasn't on her anymore.

"Dawn's a kleptomaniac. Ever since my parents started to split up, she's been stealing things to get their attention, and now she just can't stop."

"Oh." Xander and Willow said at the same time.

"So, tell me about Faith." I said again. Willow and Xander groaned.

"Okay, I was wrong about you having a crush on her. It's an obsession!" Willow teased.

"Well, I can't help it if you guys won't really tell me anything. I don't care if she sleeps around. I didn't say I was looking to _date_ her or anything. I just want to know about her. You know, know what to watch out for in case she sets her sights on me."

Willow sighed."What do you want to know?"

"Well... I mean... is she fake?"

"What?" Willow asked.

"No, she's all natural. No plastic what-so-ever." Xander replied, and Willow and I raise an eyebrow at him. "What? You asked if she was fake."

"How do you know if she's had plastic surgery?" Willow asked.

"Are you kidding me?" Xander asked. "I have a gift. I can tell when someone's been plasticked."

"Really?" Willow asked, like "Mm-hmm. Right."

"Okay, I figured out how to tell when Cordy got that nose job, remember?"

"Anyway..." I said. "Back to the original subject. I don't mean has she had plastic surgery or anything. I mean, is she fake? She's not one of those rich kids who acts poor just so she can _say_ she's struggled, is she?"

"Oh, no. Trust me, she's struggled. It's one of the only two things I respect about her." Willow said. "I mean, I'm not going to go into any details or anything, you'll have to ask her yourself, if you're really interested, but she's got it rough."

"Yeah. Willow's right about that." Xander agreed, shoving another of my mom's brownies into his mouth. Oh, I didn't mean that like that. I meant a literal brownie! Oh, very, very bad mental image! Very bad brain!

"Okay." I'll accept that. For now. "So... I mean, how well do you guys even really know her? I mean, she might just have some issues or something. Maybe all those times she's broken girls' hearts, she was just testing them or something, seeing if they cared enough about her to fight for her. Maybe she doesn't want to take a chance on someone who's not willing to fight for her."

"Buffy, you're reaching." Willow said. "It's obvious you like her, Buffy, but trust us. Let her go. She's not the relationship type."

I sighed. "Fine. I guess." I admit, I'm disappointed.

Two hours later, Willow and Xander head home. Another three hours after that, and I'm crawling into bed and falling asleep.

And dreaming about a certain dark-haired girl in a leather jacket.

...

I woke up the next morning and had an epiphamy... epiphany... epi... well, however the hell it's spelled, I had one! I can't stop thinking about Faith ever since I saw her the previous morning. And I decide I'm not going to let the rumors about Faith discourage me. I'm just going to have to find out for myself what she's like. And that means getting to know her.

So, now I'm standing with Willow and Xander outside the doors, still thirty minutes to go before the first morning bell rings.

We're talking about nothing in particular when I see Faith and her gang walk over to the front steps. Most of them lean up against the side of the building while others sit down on the steps. Faith is just standing there, talking about something with the group. Something about how she threw some rich kid into a dumpster for poking fun at her jacket. The other "tough guys" burst into laughter at that, and Faith notices me staring at her again. She slaps one of her friends in the chest and says she'll be right back.

I turn back to Willow and Xander quickly, who noticed my staring as well. And Faith walks right up to me and taps me on the shoulder.

"Hey, Blondie." She says, and I turn to face her.

"It's Buffy." I correct her, purposely putting some attitude into my voice, like I'm mad that she threw someone in a dumpster, though I've got to admit, I do like her jacket.

She whistles, like she's commenting on my attitude, but can see right through it.

"What's up with the stare fest, huh?" She asks, and even through her sunglasses, I can see her eyes laughing at me, though she's very good at keeping it from reaching her mouth. Her lips. The big, plump red lips that I suddenly find myself staring at. And she doesn't fail to notice.

"Hey, Blondie, my eyes are up here." She sayd, growling, but I can still see the humor in her eyes.

"It's Buffy." I correct again.

"Right, sorry, whatever. So, Buffy, you mind tellin' me what you're starin' at me for over there? And why you kept starin' at me all day yesterday?" She knows why. She knows she's hot. And she know's that anyone who's even remotely attracted to girls seriously has the hots for her.

I figure that she's probably the type of person who appreciates directness instead of beating around the bush, so if I'm going to have any chance of proving Willow and Xander wrong, I'm going to have to play the tough girl act, too.

"So what, a girl can't appreciate a good view?" I ask, taunting her, and I can feel Willow and Xander tense up. Meanwhile, I see the corner of Faith's mouth twitch slightly, amused.

"Well, I guess a good view is always appreciated." Faith agrees.

"You know, I might look better if you'd take off those sunglasses." Faith's mouth twitches again.

"You got balls, girl." She says, but she takes off her sunglasses anyway, and I'm amazed by the deep chocolate brown irises. I'm dumbstruck. I don't know if I can talk. She smiles slightly. "What do you know? Looks like you're right. The view is better without shades." She says, then she puts her sunglasses back on and walks back over to her friends, swinging her hips as she walks away.

"Well... Looks like you're on her radar now, Buff." Xander says grudingly.

"Looks like..." I mutter in agreement. Damn. She's so sexy, even with the sunglasses hiding her eyes, but when I see her without them, up close... She's not just sexy... She's stunning.


	2. Chapter 2

I'm... What?

(Buffy's POV)

It's been about a week since Faith first spoke to me outside the doors, and since then, she hasn't approached me since. No mater how many times I know she's caught me staring at her. I know when she's caught me, because she always starts swinging her hips just a little more, like she's actually_ trying_ to keep my attention. But she only ever does it for me. When any other guys, or even some girls, stare at her ass, she kind of smiles, but keeps walking. She knows she's hot, but she only ever _emphasizes _it for me. So why hasn't she tried to talk to me since the second day?

Well, today, I'm going to find out. Everyone's waiting on the grass for the day to start, as usual, and I see Faith and her "gang" in their usual place just outside the front doors, out of the way, out of the sunlight, but so they can see everyone. Willow and Xander are walking with me, but as soon as I see Faith, I break away from them, making a mental note to apologize for it later.

"Faith, can I talk to you a minute?" I ask her when I'm standing little more than an arm's length away from the group. They all turn to face me, and some of the guys snicker while the others are checking me out.

"Um... sure, what's up?" She ask, like she's never seen me before, like she's wondering how I know her name. She doesn't move, everyone just stares at me expectantly.

"Alone?" I ask.

"Oh!" Faith says with a smirk. "You should clarify things like that." She says sarcastically, but still doesn't move. "You got somethin' to say? You can say it in front of them." She says, and her message, assuming that I'm not reading too much into it, is clear. She's not even going to bother with me if I'm not brave enough to talk to her in front of people.

"Fine." I growl. "So what's your problem, huh?" Faith looks surprized, like she'd been expecting me to beg her to go out with me, or hit on her or something.

"Um... Not sure I know what you're talkin' about, B." She looks genuinely confused, as well.

"You just walk up to girls, hit on them, and then ignore them all the time?"

She chuckles, then takes a few steps towards me, like she's trying to intimidate me. I don't back down, even though she's easily four inches taller than me, plus she still looks like a complete badass while I'm still looking like a girly girl, like my sister. She's impressed, though.

"Maybe I was waitin' on you to come talk to me." She says, her hands in her pockets.

"Well here I am." I say, still not backing down. In fact, I decide to take a step forward, and she reacts in a way I definitely do NOT expect. She flinches.

She recovers quickly, though. "Yeah. Here you are. So, you want somethin'? Or are ya gonna get outta my face?" She actually looks mad. What the hell?

"I... uh... I just... I thought-"

"Yeah, well, that's somethin' blondes don't do too well, huh? Think? I mean, unless you were lyin' yesterday about that bein' your "natural hair color"."

"No, it's... It's natural..." I take a step backwards, and when she doesn't try to stop me from leaving, I turn and walk away.

_What just happened?_ I ask myself, and I go over the encounter several times in my mind. The only explanation I can come up with is that the rumors about her are true, and she's a bitchy control freak that absolutely cannot _stand_ having people stand up to her. _Am I attracted to a bully?_

"What was that about, Buff?" Willow asks when I return to her and Xander.

"What?" I ask. "Oh, right. Sorry, just wanted to ask her something."

Willow sighs. "I did tell you, she's no good, Buff."

"Yeah. Should have listened to you. Sorry. And sorry for the ditching." I apologize.

"Hey, sorry for what?" Xander asks rhetorically with a smile.

I smile back, but I'm still confused about Faith's reaction. It seems like it should be something as simple as she's a control freak, not used to people not backing down, but somehow, I think it's something deeper than that.

But I push all thoughts of Faith out of my mind when the morning bell rings.

...

I don't see Faith in Biology today. Or Algebra. Or History. As a matter of fact, other than catching a glimpse of her in the lunch hall during, well, lunch, I don't see her all morning.

But then Gym comes.

Everyone's supposed to change out into a red t-shirt and yellow shorts for gym, and, of course, the girls' shorts are much shorter than the guys'. But neither Faith, nor either of her friends that also have gym that period change. They never do, but Faith usually at least takes off her jacket and participates in Gym. I figure, even if she's not much one for school at all, but she's definitely a physical person, so she always seems to enjoy getting physical in gym. But this time, she and her two pals just sit down in the bleachers off to the side.

"Lehane!" The coach yells. Faith glances over to him, but otherwise doesn't budge. Her buddies look over their shoulders at him, too. "Get out there and hit somebody!"

Okay, we're playing dodgeball. So hitting people refers, of course, to using the soft balls to do so. And somehow, that sounds worse then just the coach telling Faith to hit someone.

Faith raises her hands like "I can't hear you!", and the coach glares, and pulls out his megaphone, and shouts the same message into the megaphone. Faith sighs and gets up reluctantly. Her buddies follow her like sheep.

She slips the jacket off her shoulders and hands it to one of them, and the other one hands her a ball. She focuses for a second, then throws it. _BLAM!_ one very skinny guy wearing some of the girls' short yellow shorts (because they were out of guy shorts), falls to the ground.

"Edmonds! You're out!" The coach yells, and blows his whistle. "Smith! Yacker! Dale! You're out!" THe coach yells and blows his whistle three times. I realize Faith has just been taking person after person out, and everyone on my team is aiming for her. Obviously, she's a big player on the other team. She actually seems kind of proud, if a bit bored. But I focus on myself now as I catch a really fast moving ball coming my way. The guy who threw it looked at me in confusion. I could see his thoughts plainly on his face.

_Wait, what? How'd she catch that?_

"Hartman! You're out!" The coah shouts, and another whistle sounds, and the guy that threw the ball walks away, really confused. Faith is actually looking at me in surprize.

Apparently, Hartman is a pretty big player on the other team, as well. All of a sudden, everyone on Faith's team is aiming for me as well, except Faith. She actually avoids me. Soon, I'm the only one left standing on my team, and I alone have taken out half of her team.

I'm aiming for another one when I see him get hit.

_What?_ I'm the only one still standing on my team, and I didn't throw. I look around, just to be sure, but yep, I'm the only one. Then, I see Faith take out another member of her own team. And another.

_That's not the way the game is played!_ I'm about to protest, but apparently, the coach doesn't care. He blows on his whistle every time she hits another person, and her team mates start dropping like flies. They actually turn and start trying to get her out.

But she dodges every single projectile. I prefer to fight fair, so I throw a ball at her, looking to either end the game by getting myself out because she catches it, or getting her out so the game can be fair again. Neither happens. Despite the fact that she could easily have caught that, she dodges it instead. Finally, it's down to just her, me, and her two buddies.

She nods to them, and they each grab a ball, and just when I think I'm about to be three-timed, they hit each other with the ball, and two whistles sound.

_So that's what she was after. She wanted it to be just her and me, huh?_

She walks right up to the middle of the gym and sets the ball she's carrying on the ground. Looks like she wants to talk.

Fine, then.

I walk up to her and set my ball down right next to hers, and I look her dead in the eyes. But she averts her eyes, like it's painful to make eye contact with me.

"Okay, Faith, do you have a problem with me?" I ask bluntly. She doesn't flinch this time, even though I'm standing barely two inches away from her. There's barely any spac between us. I could easily crane my neck a bit and kiss her right now.

Then, I realize I just thought about kissing her, and I blush. That's what she seemed to be waiting for.

"No. I don't have a problem with ya, B. Just the opposite. You're... interestin'."

Interesting? Me? Faith thinks I'm interesting? "Really? Then why the no talking for almost a week? Why, when we _do_ finally talk, do you get all mad at me and tell me to get out of your face? Why do you avoid me all day? And why do you start taking out your own team mates instead of focusing on me?"

"You ask a lot of questions."

"Maybe if you'd answer some of them, you wouldn't feel so overwhelmed." And again, she gives that look of surprize that I'm getting very used to seeing.

"Hmm... Okay." She agrees. "I didn't talk to you, 'cause I was waitin' for you to talk to me. See, way I see it, I made the first move, it was you're turn."

"The first move?" I ask indignantly, and she smirks.

"Yeah. First move. I talked to you first first, it was you're turn to talk to me first. I'm kinda old-fashioned like that."

"So what? It was like... an invitation, or something?"

"Somethin' like that." Faith nods. Everyone in the bleachers is getting antsy, including the coach. They're waiting for us to beat each other to a pulp now.

"Okay, than what's with the hostility earlier?"

"That's... kinda personal. Don't think into it, okay, B?"

"And the avoiding?"

"Like I said, personal. Nothin' to do with you."

I sigh. "And the friendly fire?"

"Friendly fire?" She asks, chuckling.

"Yeah, you know, taking out your own team mates?"

She laughs again. "Like I said earlier, you're interesting."

"I'm interesting, so you take out your own team mates in dodgeball?"

"Yeah." She grins, and then sees I need more. "Okay, so see that kid up there?" She turns to the bleachers and points to the guy who threw the ball at me that I caught. Heart... something.

"Yeah?"

"That's Marcus Hartman. He's a senior, and he's already being looked at by some scouts for the majors."

"Major league... dodgeball?"

"No. Baseball. That guy can pitch a 95mph fastball and make it look easy. Barely breaks a sweat. He was the pitcher for the Sunnydale High baseball team before the team was shut down to provide more funding for the football team. Now he's the quarterback."

I whistle. "So wait, why does that make you go all Rambo on your team?"

Faith laughs again. "You like action movies? Damn, you just keep gettin' more and more interestin'. Well, you see, you caught his ball and didn't even flinch. I'm the only one who's ever done that." Now I'm surprized. "Plus, the way you were dodgin' everyone's balls from my team... You're a gymnast, aren't ya?" And I'm further surprized. She was actually paying that much attention to me?

"Um... yeah. Would join the gymnastics team, but... we don't have one here, so..."

Faith groans. "Yeah, I know right? Sucks."

"Wait, are you a gymnast, too?"

She smirks. "I just like lookin' at hot girls in tights."

"Oh." I'm kind of disappointed. Thought maybe we actually had something other than orientation in common.

"Just, whatever ya do, don't settle for bein' a cheerleader. It ain't the same."

"How would you know, if you're not a gymnast?"

"I figure, it's kinda like tradin' in a Harley for a fuckin' bicycle. Major downgrade, not nearly as satisfyin'."

"You speak as though from experience."

"Yeah. Had my license revoked over the summer. It's not the same. I'm used to the roar of the motor and the... _vibrations_ between my legs." She says suggestively, and I gulp. "Somehow, the _ching-ching _and the occasional bump in the road just isn't the same."

"So... You... You ride a motorcycle?"

"Hell yeah. Or, I did, until my license got revoked. Lookin' on gettin' it back soon, though."

"Oh."

"So, that answer all your questions?" She asks.

"No." I admit. "But it'll hold me over."

Faith nods. "Good, 'cause now I got one for you."

"And that would be?"

Faith grins. "What are you doin' this Friday night?"

...

Xander went home after gym. Apparently, Faith took him out in the second round of dodgeball, and he got a mild concussion when he hit the ground. Not enough to go to the hospital, but he was definitely seeing stars for the rest of the day.

So, Willow walked me home alone, because Dawn got in trouble and had to stay after school for detention.

"So what was that talk with Faith about earlier?" Willow asked me. She was obviously concerned.

"Well, I just asked her a couple questions, she sort of answered them, and she asked me out this Friday." I actually haven't stopped smiling since gym.

"Oh... Well... That's... great, Buff..." She... sounds... thrilled...

"Willow, it's going to be okay. I don't normally put any stock in rumors, but I'm definitely going to be careful around her." I say, and Willow seems like she relaxes a bit, but not much.

"Well... I mean, we haven't been friends long, but, for me, a week is the longest I've ever actually had a friend, besides Xander. So, I like to think of you as my best friend, if that's okay!" She blurts the last part, unsure, and I smile... you know... more.

"Will, that's okay. You're pretty much my best friend, too. Well, pretty much my only friend, along with Xander. None of my friends from LA have even _tried_ to call, so I figure that means you and Xan are it for me in the friends zone."

Willow's eyes are glistening with tears of joy. I take it friends for her are not an everyday occurence.

She wipes her eyes and laughs at herself. "Well, anyway, I just don't want to see my friends get hurt, and if you actually try to _be something_ with Faith, you're almost certain to get hurt. I know I've said it already, but I'm going to say it again. She's not the relationship type."

"I know, Will, and thanks for the concern. But trust me, I'll be fine. There's just... something about her... I can't get her out of my mind. Does that sound crazy?"

Willow thinks for a minute. "Well... normally, I'd say no. But since this _is_ Faith Lehane you're talking about, I have to say yes. It sounds insane. But..." She says, noticing my frown, "I'm not going to say anything else about it. _If_ you get hurt, I'll be here for you. You know that, right?" She looks worried, and I smile reassuringly.

"Yeah. I know that, Will. And thanks. I appreciate it." And with that, we're walking up the steps to my house.

"Hello, Willow, Buffy." My mom says cheerily when we walk in. "Girls, could you sit down for a minute? I'd like to talk to you."

Confused, Willow and I sit down on the couch, and my mom sits across from us.

"Okay, now... Buffy, you know that I know about your... orientation."

And suddenly, I know, and apparently, Willow knows, too, where my mom is going with this.

"Mom-!"

"Mrs. Summers-!" We try to stop her before she goes any further, but she holds her hand up to silence us.

"And I just want to say that I'm behind you about it. I have no problems with you being attracted to girls, but if you two are spending a _lot_ of time together, and it makes a mother wonder... if you two are actually having sex."

"Mom!" I screech.

"Mrs. Summers!" Willow's voice is just as high as my own, and we subconsciously scoot away from each other a bit.

"Mom, we're just friends!" My mom recoils at our yelling.

She holds her hands up and we quiet down, but I have to clear things up.

"Mom, Willow and I are _just friends_. I promise."

"I like boys!" Willow blurts, and my mom's face turns as red as mine and Willow's faces are. Which, is to say, redder than Willow's hair.

"Oh." She says, then she bursts into laughter, but Willow and I are actually too horrified and quite possibly scarred from this experience to laugh with her. She gets up, still laughing, and walks out of the room, and up the stairs. We hear her laughing until her bedroom door closes.

Slowly, I turn to look at Willow. And I really _look_ at Willow. I mean, I can't help it. My mom just got me to thinking about it, and I was kind of curious.

You know, she's actually not unattractive. Now that I look at her, she's actually really beautiful. I'd even go so far as to say she'd be gorgeous if she weren't so self-conscious and hiding behind all those layers of clothing. Maybe if she decided to be proud of her body, and of course, if she wasn't my best friend, therefore eliminating the awkward factor, I might even be a little attracted to her.

Willow notices me staring,though, and she shifts uncomfortably.

"So... can you say awkward?" I ask jokingly, and her tension seems to fade a little, and she laughs nervously. "Will, you know you don't have to worry, right?"

"What? Oh. Wait... You mean... You're not..."

"Well, don't get me wrong, Will, you're not exactly Queen of the Uglies. You're very beautiful, I just don't think of you like that. You're not a girl to me, you're just you. You're a Willow." I smile, hoping to God that she's not offended. But Willow seems to get what I mean, because she relaxes and smiles back.

"Thanks, Buff."

"No problem, Will. So, you hungry?"

"Starving. I didn't eat at lunch today."

"Why not?"

"Because, I swear, whatever they serve, it just _can't_ be kosher. I'm Jewish."

"Oh! I didn't know that! Oh, god... And all those Jewish jokes I made, and I had no idea, I'm sorry!"

Willow laughed. "Don't worry about it, Buffy. I'm only ewish because my parents raised me Jewish... You know... when they raised me..." Willow's face was sad.

"What's up with "Sad-face Willow"? What's wrong? Are they... you know...?"

"Oh, no! No, they're still alive... But I'm not. Not to them, anyway. They... They never really pay attention to me."

"Oh, I'm sorry, Willow." I hug her.

"It's okay, Buffy. I've got my friends. All two of them." She smiles goofily, and I'm amazed that she's strong enough to not let her parents' lack of attention get to her.

"You know, it's their loss." I say. She blinks at me. "If they can't see what an amazing person you are, then I'm just glad I can. And Xander can."

"Right... Xander..." "Sad-face Willow" is back now.

"You know... He _does_ notice how amazing you are." I say comfortingly.

"What do you mean?"

"Xander. He _does _notice."

"Not really."

"Well, guys like Xander... They have an attention span about the size the size of a pea. They can only really focus on one thing at a time, and most of the time, it's focused on their crotch." Willow laughs at that. "They focus on whatever their crotch points to, and it really only points to girls like Cordelia that like to show a lot of skin. Girls that are sexy, and know they're sexy, and aren't afraid to show it. They never really point to girls that are amazing on the inside."

"Thanks for making me feel better." Willow says sarcastically.

"I'm not finished. Now, you, Willow, are both."

"What?"

"You are smart, you're goofy, you're funny, and you're really nice. That makes you amazing on the inside. Plus, you're beautiful on the outside. You just hide it behind baggy sweaters and pastel skirts. I'm not saying you need to show a lot of cleavage or anything. But a _little_ skin wouldn't hurt. Just enough to make the guys notice you. You know, Xander's better than most guys. He really is. At first, he really only notices what's on the outside, but once he notices someone, he can see the good in them,and he'll start tonotice what's on the inside, too."

Willow seems to be relaxed, and she's smiling, so I guess I'm kind of making sense.

"Willow?"

"Yeah, Buffy?"

"Can I... Can I give you a makeover?"

"What?" Willow looks confused.

"Do you trust me?"

"Well... yeah?"

"No, do you _trust_ me?"

Willow hesitates, then nods. "Yes."

"Okay. Tomorrow, get up early. I'm coming over, and I'm going to help you get ready, okay?"

"Like... with what?"

"Everything. Just once, okay? If I'm wrong about this, then you can go back to baggy sweaters and pastel skirts, okay?"

Willow nods again, but she isn't sure.

"Trust me, when I'm done with you, even YOU will be attracted to yourself." I joke. Willow looks unsure. "Willow, you do know the difference between thinking someone's attractive and being attracted to someone, don't you?"

Willow nods, wondering where this is going.

"Well, good then. As your friend, I have to say, you are _very_ attractive. Doesn't mean I'm attracted to you, so I'm not gonna be putting the moves on you or anything. I'm just saying... If you'd be a little more proud of yourself, and realize just how beautiful you actually are, you'd be a total guy magnet!" Willow smiles at that.

"You really think so?"

"Willow, which one of us would know more about what guys find attractive on a woman? The straight girl, or the lesbian?"

Willow nods. "Good point." We laugh, and head into the kitchen to grab our snack.

...

Willow leaves at about seven, and, as usual, I'm in bed by nine. And again, as I have been since the first day of school, I dream about Faith. Something about her calls to me, and I can't get her out of my mind.

...

I'm very eager to see how the guys, especially Xander, will react to my masterpiece that is Willow Rosenberg.

_I had my mom drive me over to Willow's house, and I kind of... sort of met her parents. I mean, I said hi, they said hi. It was a thing. Anyway, I had Willow get in the shower, and she was kind of nervous as she sat down on her bed in nothing but a towel. I shaved her legs for her, and she even let me give her a haircut. I brought some of my clothes over for her to wear, too, but modified them slightly before hand so they'd suit her more. It was kind of awkward the whole time, but I guess she really does trust me, because she didn't really flinch or freak out when I touched her._

_ About an hour later, I had her look in the mirror, and she was stunned._

_ "Wow..." Was all she could say, and her eyes were wide. "Look at me..." I couldn't quite tell what she thought, because her face was just surprized face, not happy or shamed face. So, I sat on her bed, nervous._

_ "What do you think, Will?" I asked._

_ "I... I... I'm... I'm hot!" She grinned, and even struck a pose in the mirror, and relief washed over me._

And now, my mom is dropping us off. I called Xander as we left Willow's house, and told him to meet us in the parking lot.

He's standing just outside the car now.

"Okay, Will. Just stay there, and I'll tell you when to get out, okay?"

"Okay." Willow grins.

I get out of the car and hug Xander. It's something we do every day. No big deal.

"Hey, Xan. What's up?"

"Well, since you're the one who told me to meet you guys here, I'm hoping you'll tell me." He says curiously.

"Oh. Right." I facepalm, like I'm saying "silly me". "Well, I just figured, my mom has to go to the gallery early today, so she decided to drop me off at school." I turn Xander around and start walking away. When Xander's turned around, I motion for Willow to get out. Once she's out of the car, and standing upright, I continue talking. "So, I told her, "Hey! Let's swing by Willow's and pick her up!" So, we did."

"Wait, Willow's with you? Shouldn't we wait for... her..." He trails off and freezes when he sees Willow standing there, and I swear, a shift in the air tells me that his teenage boy compass is aimed directly at Willow. Unwaveringly at Willow.

She's wearing a deep red shirt with plastic rubies embedded around the v-neck collar, and a pair of denim shorts that stop about halfway down her thighs, and a pair of black leather boots my mom let her borrow. Luckily they wear about the same size. Her hair is short now, and stops around her ears, and she's wearing my pair of silver looped earrings. She has on pink lipstick, and a little bit of green eyeshadow. Not much, just enough to stand out from the rest of the outfit. The v-neck doesn't show much, basically just her throat, the ends of her collar bones, and a sliver of the dip between her breasts. The boots go halfway up her calves. She's also wearing a silver Star of David pendant pretty similar to my silver cross. In a word, she looks absolutely stunning, and I think she'll make lesbians out of a few straight girls.

She kind of squrims under his gaze, nervous, but I signal for her to stick to the plan. She nods, and walk up to us like nothing's new.

"Hey, Xander, what's up?" She asks, putting her arms around mine and Xander's shoulders and we walk off. I wave goodbye to my mom, and she drives off.

When we get to the front of campus, everyone's head is turning towards her. Girls are mad that their boyfriends are gawking at another hottie, and the guys are all... well... gawking at another hottie! Xander trips over his tongue a few times, and I've got to say, I'm actually a bit jealous of Willow now. Because she even has Faith's eye. I can tell she's staring at Willow instead of me, because I don't feel her eyes on me, I can feel her gaze go straight past me. Plus, when I walk up to her and her gang, none of them are looking at me, they're all looking at her.

_I do not resent Willow. I do not resent Willow. I do not resent Willow._

"Hey, Faith." I say, and she snaps out of her trance, as do her friends.

"Whoa, hey there, B. What's up?"

"Nothing much, _F_. Just saying hey." I tease.

She raises an eyebrow at my use of her first initial, but doesn't really react.

"Oh. Hey. You want somethin' else?"

I recoil. _Okay, seriously? What is her problem?_

"Well... I'm wondering if we're still on for Friday night, or if that was just some joke or something." I say angrily, and she sighs.

Her gang looks back and forth between me and her, as if asking her if I'm actually serious, if she _actually_ asked me out.

"No."

"No?" I ask, my anger rising.

"No, it wasn't a joke. I'm serious, B." She turns to each of her friends, who are staring at her with hidden smirks. "And if any of you dirtbags decide to start jackin' around with me, I'll rip your dicks off with my bare hands, got it?" She growls. None of them take her seriously, but they don't say anything, either.

"Damn, Faith. And here, I thought you didn't like touching dicks." I say, and she flushes. The guys around us howl with laughter, though, and I think I've at least impressed her friends.

"Daaaaaaamn!" One of them said. Unfortunately, he's the one closest to her, and he doubles over, coughing and laughing after she punched him in the gut.

"Anyone else wanna poke fun?" She growls, but we can all see the corner of her mouth twitch.

"Aw, come on, Faith. We're just messin' with ya." One of her other friends says.

"Yeah, not every day one of your conquests bites back!" Another one says. The guys all roll with laughter. I don't. And neither does Faith.

""Conquests"?" I ask her, and I can feel the anger rising again. "Then... Then the rumors are true?" I ask softly, and her eyes turn back to me. I can see her rage fade, and she's almost pleading with me not to leave.

"B, please, no... It's... It's not like that!"

"Well... I'm glad we haven't gone on that _date_ yet." I growl, and I fight down tears. I smack her on the cheek, hard, and I see her reach up with her right hand and cup the spot I slapped her on, then I turned and walked away without another word. But then, just as I reach the bottom step, I turn and walk back up a few steps. "You know, Faith, my friends, Willow and Xander, they warned me that you were no good. They told me that you weren't the relationship type, and that it was like a game to you. See how many girls' pants you can get into. I didn't believe them. I didn't _want_ to believe them. Now I have to go tell them they were right."

"B! It's not like that!" She starts running after me, but I'm gone. She doesn't get too far from her group before she decides it's a bad idea to go after me right now. Or ever.

...

"Buffy?" Willow calls to me as I storm past. She and Xander hop off the bench they were sitting on and come after me.

"What's wrong, Buff?" Xander asks. I storm into the girls' bathroom, and Xander stops at the door, but Willow follows me in.

"Buffy? What's wrong?" She asks, standing behind me in front of one of the mirrors.

"Nothing... I'm sorry, Will. Today was supposed to be for you, and here I am, ruining it by taking everyone's attention away from you."

"Are you kidding? You did me a favor. Don't get me wrong, I like that I caught everyone's eye, and I actually like looking at myself like this, but I felt like I was under a microscope out there. But that's not the point. What's wrong, Buffy?"

I hesitate, then look at her through the mirror.

"It's Faith."

"Oh..."

"You guys were... You were right. I was just talking to her, and one of her friends mentioned something about me just being one of her conquests. He wasn't saying it to hurt me, it was like he assumed Iknew what I was in for."

"Well... maybe... maybe she's changed... Maybe he only _thought_ you were one of her future conquests. Maybe... Maybe she really likes you."

Then, I hear a throat clear. Willow and I whip around, expecting to see Xander standing with the door open, expecting us to invite him in. Instead, I see someone who has every right to be in the girls' bathroom.

Faith.

I glare at her, and feel Willow doing the same.

"B... Can I... Can I talk to ya? Alone?" She's pleading with me, begging.

"You got something to say? You can say it in front of her. And Xander." I say, pretty much quoting what she said yesterday. I walk out of the bathroom and wait for her in the hall, with Xander and Willow beside me.

She runs her hand through the back of her hair and sighs. Apparently, she was really hoping for a one-on-one explanation.

"Okay... Fine..." She says, and starts off very awkwardly. "Look, B... I... I'm... uh... I'm not real good with this... ya know, talkin' about feelin's... stuff... It's... not really one of my... my strong suits... ya know... 'Specially not around tons of people..." She looks around and sees everyone standing around us, staring. All they're seeing is the school's "Tough Girl" reduced to a stammering wretch. "Can... Can we... ya know... find... dind somwhere else...? Ya can bring your friends... I guess..."

"No." I say sternly.

"Buffy..." Willow says softly.

"No, Willow. Whatever she has to say, she can say in public. If she's telling the truth about it really not being what it looks like, and I'm really not one of her "conquests", she can tell everyone." Another tear rolls down my cheek, but I stand my ground.

Faith sighs and turns away, and starts slamming her head against the wall.

"Aargh!" She grunts in frustration. I guess she's _really_ not good at talking about feelings. Then, I notice that her leather jacket friends are gathered around to watch, as well. If they're really friends, they'll probably be there to back her up if things don't go right.

Finally, Faith turned back around towards me, and she manages to look me in the eye, though it looks hard for her to do.

"B... When I first saw ya starin' at me in the hallway, I gotta admit, the first thing I thought was wonderin' how ya were in bed." I flinch, but she continues. "And, so, for a while, yeah, you _were_ gonna be one of my conquests. But... You... You surprized me, okay? I mean, I thought I'd met every typa girl out there. The depressed chicks... The rich chicks... Chicks with a superiority complex... Shy girls too afraid to even say hi to people they see as superior... chicks who don't got it as good as most, but let it go to their heads and think that they're better than everyone else, 'cause they've struggled a bit... brainy chicks... narcisisstic chicks... every kinda chick out there. But then you come along, and at first, I'm thinkin' you gotta be one of those, 'cause all girls fit into one of those categories. But you surprized me. I... I can't figure you out, B... You confuse me... I mean... You're not afraid to speak your mind... You tell it like you see it... You don't lie to fit in... You don't lie to spare peoples' feelin's..." Faith fell silent, looking around for some kind of escape, but everyone around, even her friends, were urging her on. Sighing in defeat, she continued. "At first, I did wanna conquer ya. You're hot, and I thought you'd turn out to be one of those blonde bimbos that basically gets off lookin' in the mirror. Sorry, Harm." Faith looked over at an oblivious Harmony Kendall, and some snickers in the crowd kind of let her relax a bit, but not much.

"But... I actually find you interestin'. Like... I actually wanna _hear_ what you have to say. Like I wanna do _more_ than just get some and get gone. Look... Can I... Can I show ya somethin'?" I notice she put emphasis on the word "you", like it was something she only wanted me to see. I nodded, and Willow and Xander backed away a bit. She reached into her backpack and pulled out a spiral notebook. She walked over and handed it to me.

"Ignore the first half of it... I get bored occasionally." She says, and takes a couple steps back.

I don't ignore it, though. I look at the amazing detail in every single sketch in the notebook. A lot of them are pretty awesom motorcycles, or medieval weaponry. Knives, swords, axes, you name it, it's in there. Finally, I get to a drawing of me. And this is the most perfect drawing I've seen in the book so far. I'm bent over a table in Biology, focused on my assignment. I remember this. This was last friday. Willow, Faith and I were all paired together to work on a little observation lab. Willow and I did all the work. Faith didn't contribute, and now I know why.

She drew me perfectly. I turn the page, and it's another drawing of me. It isn't as perfect as the other one, but that's probably because she was drawing from imagination. I don't remember ever smiling at her like that. There's another one of a motorcycle on the next page, but then the next five drawings in the notebook are of me, each one progressively getting better and better, even though it was all from imagination. The rest of the notebook is empty, and I hand it back to her. She snatches it a bit faster than I think she meant to, like she didn't want anyone to even have the slightest chance to see it, and she carefully stored it in her backpack.

"I... I can't fuckin' stop thinkin' about you, B. All weekend, I was just thinkin' about how I wished I knew where ya lived so I could run by and visit or somethin'. I was just thinkin' how much I was lookin' forward to seein' you at school on Monday. Ya know... the real reason I didn't talk to ya since that first time... I was nervous." She turned around again, laughing at herself. Then, she turned back to me, and I swear, she actually looked like she was in tears. "Ya know, you're the only girl I've ever actually been too nervous to talk to." She chuckles, hiding the choking in her throat. "I... I, um... I mean, I used to watch these movies, right? When I was real little... A little girl, 'bout five or six... in one of... in one of my foster homes. It was one of the few decent ones." I'm stunned. I had no idea she was a foster child. "It... They were those cheesy Disney movies. I always liked imaginin' I was one of the... One of the Princes... that I'd fall in love at first sight, and fight dragons, or witches, or sea demons or some shit like that so I could win the heart of... of Princess Jasmine... or Ariel... or Sleepin' Beauty... Snow White... that chick from Beauty and the Beast... Kinda funny, actually. I knew even back then what I am... A lesbian... I always knew I wanted to play the part of the Prince, to be able to fight for the perfect girl, to fall in love at first sight. And... well, obviously, that just doesn't happen... Not in real life... But it's close enough for me... I... I really like you, B... And hell, if I've got to stand up and fight a dragon now or somethin', I'll do anythin'... Just... Just give me a chance, B... Let me prove that those rumors about me... They may have been true before, but let me prove that they're not true now. Please..." Faith steps back and shifts on her feet, her hands in her pockets, waiting for my answer.

Everyone is staring at me now, including both Faith's friends and Will and Xander.

I'm speechless, but the longer I stay silent, the redder her face turns, and the closer to tears she comes.

"Uh... I... Um..." I'm stammering now. Now _I'm_ the stammering wretch.

"B?" Faith asks, begging me to say yes.

"You... You forgot the most important one..." I managed, and her panic turns to confusion.

"What?"

"Princess... You forgot the most important one... Cinderella... You forgot Cinderella." It's not exactly a yes or a no, but I can't manage to get either yes or no out right now. It's the best I can do.

Luckily, Faith seems to know what I mean, because she grins in relief, and she runs back up to me and throws her arms around my neck. And then we're kissing. And my mind is blank. The only thing I can register is Faith. The sound of her rapid heartbeat and breathing. The taste of her lips and tongue. The smell of motor grease, or whatever it's called. She'd probably been working on her motorcycle or something before she came to school.

And, of course, how amazing it feels to be kissing her.

**So, I know that two chapters is kind of a short beginning for a relationship with someone you barely know, but them actually getting together isn't actually the main point of this story. It's what they go through **_**while**_** they're together that I'm working on. In any case, I hope you guys liked this chapter!**


	3. Chapter 3

I'm... What?

(Buffy's POV)

There's been a big change in Faith since that day, outside the bathroom. It's only been a week, but she's already going all out on the girlfriend stuff, like she's desparate to change my mind about her. Like she's afraid I still believe the rumors are still true, and that I'm going to come to my senses and leave her. How could this have happened so fast? It's only been two weeks since we even _met_, and already she's one of my favorite people in the world. But, I'm almost afraid... I'm almost afraid that she'll turn out to be insane, like my previous girlfriend.

So, I decide to ask her a question. And the opportunity comes tonight.

I haven't told my mom yet that I'm dating someone, but not because I'm ashamed of Faith. It's because I just want us to be for... for _us_ right now. I mean, I can't help it that the entire school knows, but I've asked Willow and Xander to not say anything about me and Faith being together when they're over at my house. But if all goes well tonight, I might be ready to tell my mom.

I told my mom that another friend of mine, not Xander or Willow, I don't want to lie _too_ much to her, wanted to hang out with me tonight, so I asked if I could have a slightly later curfew. She didn't have a problem with it, so here we are. Just me and Faith. We're lying on a blanket on the side of a hill, staring up at the stars. The night is clear, and the air is clean. It's beautiful. I look over at Faith and I see her, illuminated by the light of the moon. She's so beautiful. I can't help myself.

I reach over and cup her cheek, turning her to face me, and I smile as I lean in and kiss her. Her lips are sweet as always. It's kind of cliché, but I really like the taste of cherry chapstick on her lips.

"What was that for?" She asks me, grinning ear to ear.

"I felt like it." I reply, my grin as wide as hers. But then, she starts to panic as I grow serious.

"What? What's wrong?"

"Nothing, nothing. I just..."

"Just what?" She sits up, looking down at me.

"Faith... How long have we been dating?"

"Um... about a week. Why?" She's really panicking now. "Oh God, it's moving too fast, isn't it?"

"No!" I say, sitting up and putting my arms around her neck. "No, everything is perfect. But... I'm just wondering... have... have you been counting the seconds since we started dating?"

"Wait, am I supposed to be? Because I can start! I can do some math, figure out how many seconds we've been dating and start from there..."

"No!" I smile. "God, no. I was just curious. Because... well, I've only had one girlfriend before... and she was literally counting every second we dated. It... It was kind of creepy... Let's just say... her new address is the Los Angeles Loony Bin. Not even kidding. For almost a month, I was literally dating an insane person. And... I was just... paranoid, I guess..." I smile sheepishly at her in apology.

"You... You were just checking to see if I'm crazy?" Faith asks, and I'm afraid she's mad for a second. Then she smiles. "Well... I am. Crazy."

"What?" I flinch backwards a bit.

"I'm crazy. I'm crazy about _you_. I don't know why... but... I feel like I'd do anythin' for ya, B."

I relax. But then I tense up. "Faith, I don't know where this is going right now, but I feel like the "L" word is about to come up, so let me just stop you right there. I'm... I'm not ready for that yet..."

Faith lays back down, laughing.

"Don't worry about it, B. Not really ready for that myself."

I relax again, and I lay back down with her, and she lets me snuggle up to her. She puts her arm around me and slips her other arm under her head, and we go back to just staring up at the stars.

"Faith?" I ask after a few minutes.

"Yeah, B?"

"Do you feel ready to take another step?"

She tenses up a little. "What kinda step?"

"It's kind of a big one, but not a _really_ big one, you know?"

"Well... what do ya have in mind?"

"I... I want you to meet my mom."

She turns to look at me again, and I meet her gaze. She has to avert her eyes. Ever since that day in the hall, when I decided to take a chance with her, she hasn't been able to look me in the eyes for more than a second.

"Faith... why don't you ever look me in the eyes?" I ask, and I sense that that was a mistake. She flinches and sits up, visibly tense.

"B... please... just... I'm... I don't talk about stuff like that."

But I'm not going to let it go, either.

"Why not? I'm your girlfriend. I want to know about you."

"Buffy, just drop it, okay? It's... It's just _me_ problems. It's got nothin' to do with you." I fall silent. I decide not to push it any further. For now.

"Okay. I'll let it go. For now." She relaxes a bit, but she knows that I'm not going to _completely_ let it go. "So?"

"So what?"

"Will you meet my mom?"

She exhales, relieved we're at least on to a different topic now.

"Yeah. I... I think I'd like that."

I smile.

"Does... Does she know about me?" She looks at me.

"Well... not _exactly_. I've mentioned your name. I told her you're another friend. But I haven't really mentioned the word _girlfriend_ yet. But I will tonight. I promise." She nods.

"Expected as much. Haven't told the fosters I'm seein' someone yet, either."

"Right, I've been meaning to ask you about that. So, you're a foster kid?"

She hesitates, but I guess she decides she can tell me a _little bit_ about it, anyway. "Yeah. I'm a foster kid."

"So what are they like?"

She sighs. "They're alright, as far as temp parents go. Not too strict, but they still pay attention to me. They're not exactly rich, but they manage to support me and the others."

"Others?"

"Yeah. My foster siblings. There're five of us total. There's me, Julian, Tyler, Augustus, Jamie, and Grant. I'm the oldest. Grant's the middle kid... and he's also my biological brother."

"You have a brother?"

"Yeah. We get along alright, but we keep our distance from each other most of the time... It kinda reminds us that we used to have a real family. Real mom and dad. It's kinda painful. He was too young to remember them. I was real young when they..."

I squeeze her shoulder, letting her know she doesn't have to go on. She squeezes my hand in appreciation.

"Anyway, yeah... It's alright. I'm not exactly one of the lucky ones, but I'm not one of the unlucky ones, either."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, I mean, It's not like my foster parents are abusive or anythin'... but... they don't really _love_ me, either. They just... they wanted Grant, and when they found out about me, they took me, too, so that Grant wouldn't have to lose his only family, and also 'cause I looked like I was old enough to babysit. They pay attention to me, and they treat me right, so I don't really give 'em any trouble. Least, I try not to. Some things just can't be avoided, though, I guess."

"Yeah. Guess not..." Faith notices the look in my eye, and she looks at me curiously.

"So, enough about me, huh? How 'bout you, B? What's your family sitch?"

"Well... My mom _is_ actually my mom. Biologically and parentally speaking. She's cool. Got a sister, Dawn, but you knew that. Um... My parents just recently got divorced. That's why we moved here. Away from LA. Away from my dad. We're... Not exactly hurting for money. My dad's a lawyer. Makes good money. My mom's got a nice job at an art gallery, she makes pretty good money. So, like I said, we're not really hurting for money. Plus, she got a nice settlement from the divorce. She has full custody of me and Dawn, of course, but he's allowed to visit whenever he wants, as long as he clears it with Mom, first."

"Wait... your dad's a lawyer, but he lost the custody battle?" Faith is as confused as I was at first, until I figured it out.

"Yeah..."

"What kinda lawyer is he?"

"That's the funny thing... He's a divorce lawyer. And he's damn good at his job. That's why he gets paid as much as he does. He even handles mostly rich clients." Now she notices the tears in my eyes, and she's starting to back off. But I'm definitely more the "talk about my feelings" type.

"Damn... That just don't sound right."

"It isn't... And at first, I was really confused... I've seen him in court. He's a natural. I've seen him lawyer-talk circles around other lawyers with tons more experience than him. So... Why couldn't he beat my mom's lawyer?"

The look on Faith's face says she's figured it out, but doesn't want to say it.

"Finally... I figured it out... He didn't even try. He didn't really _try_ to fight for us. If he had, he could've taken full custody and gotten a much lower settlement with no more effort than twitching his nose." The tears are streaming now.

"Fuck him..." Faith growls. "I sure as hell woulda fought tooth and nail for ya."

I laugh. "Yeah... I mean... he never really had much time for me and Dawn, even before my parents started talking about divorce. So, I'm not disappointed with the outcome. But... it hurts, you know? My own father didn't even really want me."

"Well... Guess I should actually be thankin' the asshole." I look at her in surprise. "I mean, if he'd actually fought, and won, you wouldn't have moved here, and I never woulda met ya." I smile now, and she kisses the tears away. "But still... That's just not right... I do vaguely remember my parents. And they loved me, and my brother. They loved us to... They loved us. If they'd gotten divorced, it'd have been war between them, seein' who got to take us. Both of 'em would've fought tooth and nail to take custody of us. I... I can't imagine someone's actual parents not wantin' them. Even though I see it every day. Like your pals... Red, and that perv you're always hangin' out with. I hear neither of their parents give two fuckin' figs about them."

"Yeah..."

"You know... not everyone knows this about me... really, not even my friends do... but I actually _do_ think about my future."

"Really? What do you think about?"

"I wanna help people. Just... I wanna help people. Like... I wanna help kids who're bein'... bein' abused by their parents... I wanna help people livin' in shitholes who can't barely make it day to day..."

"You want to be some kind of social worker?"

Faith looks at me, and nods. "Yeah. Somethin' like that. I wanna help people who're havin' a hard time. I don't wanna be one of those money hungry types who just wanna make a big fat paycheck, I want to really _help_ people."

I smile. "Well, I think that's great, Faith. That's a dream to be proud of." She grins at me and lets a few tears of her own fall.

"I've lived in some pretty shitty foster homes, B. And... It just makes me think... maybe if I'd had someone... someone that does what I wanna do... maybe it wouldn't have been so hard. I mean, even just someone to talk to... But now... Now, I find it hard to talk about really anythin' personal... So... you're gonna have to be patient with me, B..."

"I will be. Don't worry." I stroke her hair, then pull her in and kiss her again.

"I'd better get ya home. Mama Bear's not gonna be happy if I keep you out much longer." Faith says when we pull apart, and I agree. I look at my phone and see it's already nine o' clock.

"Yeah, because now's about the time I'm usually in bed, going to sleep."

"Okay. Let's head that way, then." Faith says, and we roll up the blanket again, and she carries it in one arm while she drapes the other around my shoulders, and we walk away from the hillside.

...

We're standing on my front porch, kind of hesitant to knock. We've decided we're ready for my mom to know about us, and for Faith to meet her, but we haven't decided really _when_ she'll meet her. It could be now.

"So... is it time?" She asks me.

"I don't know... You want to go ahead and... you know... do it?"

"Well... I don't wanna wait too much longer... but... she'll be expectin' to meet me..."

"Yeah... she will... Whether you're my friend or my girlfriend, she'll be expecting to meet you." I squeeze myself nervously, and Faith's leather jacket squeaks. She noticed me shivering in the cool night air, and automatically draped the warm jacket around my shoulders. I'm beginning to think my girlfriend is a closet romantic.

"So... we really gonna do this?"

"I... I guess so." I say, and smile nervously. I turn towards the door and knock three times.

My mom opens the door about thirty seconds later.

"Buffy?" She looks at the jacket around my shoulders, and see's Faith standing next to me in leather pants and a red tank top, and I think she puts two and two together. But, after the "mistaking Willow for my girlfriend" fiasco last week, she's hesitant to actually say anything. "Who's your... friend?"

"Um... let's go inside. It's kind of cold out here." I suggest, and my mom steps aside, letting me in. Faith stands on the porch, though, nervous.

"Um... why don't you come in? It _is_ pretty cold out." My mom says to her, and Faith slowly inches past my mom and stands at the foot of the stairs, shifting on her feet, her hands in her pockets, and looking everywhere but at Mom. It's kind of like a nervous tic with her, I guess.

"So, Buffy? Who's your friend?" Mom asks me, still standing, like she's trying to play the "father figure" now and intimidate Faith. And it's working.

"Um... I'm... I'm Faith..." Faith replies, holding out a slightly shaky hand. Mom takes her hand with a stern gaze and squeezes it. She looks Faith up and down, and I can tell her first impression is not an overly good one.

"Um... Faith, why don't you come sit down?" I suggest, and Faith moves to stand by me, but she's afraid she'll be disrespecting my mom, so she doesn't sit. Sighing, I stand up next to her.

"Mom... This is Faith... My girlfriend..."

She doesn't flinch. She just stares at Faith, obviously aware that Faith can't look her in the eye.

"Your girlfriend, huh?"

"Yes... She's my girlfriend."

Mom nods, then sits down in the same chair she'd sat down in when she thought Willow was my girlfriend.

"Sit." My mom says, and our butts hit the couch faster than... something that sits down really fast... I can't really think right now, I'm so nervous. "So, Faith... Tell me a bit about yourself."

"Um... whaddya wanna... I... I mean, what do you want to know?" I notice how she emphasizes every word, so she won't come across as lazy. I'm nervous, but I'm also glad that she's actually putting effort into making a good impression. She's even sitting up straight and tall, not slouching. But I notice how she has to keep some part of herself moving at all times. She looks around the room a few times, but she sees my mom doesn't seem to like that, so she tries to focus on at least looking at some part of my mom's face. She starts slightly tapping her foot on the ground instead, to work off some of the tension in her body.

"Well, for starters, what's your last name?"

"Lehane, ma'am. My name is Lehane. Faith Lehane." She says almost before my mom finishes the question.

"Well, Faith. How long have you been seeing my daughter?"

"About a week, Mom." I interject, but she's still looking expectantly at Faith. I sigh and sit back. This is between them.

"One week and two days." Faith says, then thinks for a minute. "Seein' as it was just before school... I'd say, more like one week, one and a half days."

My mom seems satisfied. At least she didn't name the exact second.

"Where are you from?"

"Right here in SunnyD." Faith clears her throat. "Sunnydale. I'm from the south side of town, though."

"Mom, could you please just relax?" I ask desparately, and my mom glares at me.

"B... It's okay. I've got this." Faith says, squeezing my hand. She stands up, and my mom stands up to meet her. "Ms. Summers, my name is Faith Lehane. I'm a foster child living on the south side of town. I live with my two foster moms, three foster siblings and my baby brother, who is actually my biological brother. His name's Grant. I'll be honest, I don't have the best past when it comes to datin', in fact, I don't normally date at all, but Buffy is special. She means a lot to me, and I can't stop thinkin' about her. I know you've recently been divorced, so you're playin' the part of both parents right now, so your instincts are goin' to tell you to check up on me, find out what you can about me. I'm not gonna try and stop you. You're not goin' to like everythin' you hear, and you probably won't like _me_ after you hear it, but I'm askin' you right now to trust me. You don't have to like me, but please, just trust me. Even in just the short time I've known Buffy, she's become one of the most important people in the world to me. Hurtin' her is the last thing I wanna do." Faith falls silent, and my mom seems to be surprized, and maybe a bit impressed with Faith's honesty.

"Well, do you want to save me some time and _tell_ me some of these things I won't like?" She asks, and Faith pales.

"No ma'am, I don't. But I will, anyway." Faith admits. She looks back down at me, like she's apologizing for what I'm about to hear. "When I was thirteen, I got arrested and did some time in juvie 'cause I stabbed a guy." My mom is enraged, and she looks at me like she's astounded that I'm dating a criminal, but I'm just as shocked as she is. But Faith isn't done. "And I'm not goin' to stand here and make up excuses. But, really, I don't regret it. Because it was in self-defense. I was protectin' myself and my foster siblings. My foster parents called a friend of theirs to watch us while they went out to eat one night, and once they were gone, the guy they called sat us all down to watch a movie. He sat down with all of us, but not much later, he starts touchin' me. He's puttin' his hand on my leg, and rubbin' my thigh, he's strokin' my hair, runnin' his hand down my arm..." Faith is in tears of anger, and my mom looks horrified. "I've been in some bad foster homes before. One of my foster dad's went to prison once because he sexually assaulted me. I kinda flashed back to that, and I got scared, but I didn't do anythin' at first, 'cause I thought he might stop after a minute, and everythin' would be fine. But he didn't. He started... He..." Faith stopped and choked on a breath she took. I pull her back down to the couch and squeeze her hand, encouraging her. "I'm sorry... I... It's hard to talk about..." Faith admits, choking on her words. My mom nods.

"It's okay, you don't have to go on." She says, but Faith shakes her head.

"No... You deserve to know who your daughter's datin'... And B..." Faith turns to me. "You deserve to know, too. You deserve to know everythin'..."

"Well... Let's just start with small things." I suggest.

"I... I'll at least finish this one..." Faith said, and I nod. I'm crying along with her. "Um... He... He put his hand... between my legs, and he... He started kinda pressin' on me... I lost it. I reached over and I punched him, hoping I'd at least startle him away from me. But he just got mad. He reached over and slapped me, and he pushed me down on the couch, and he... He ripped my pants off, and he started with his... I kicked him in the balls, and he fell down on the ground, then chased me into the kitchen... The other kids were screamin'... I tried to find somethin'... anythin' to scare him away... So I grabbed this knife my foster mom had, and I turned to face him, but he was comin' too fast, and..." Faith sobs. "I didn't mean to hurt him... I was just scared..." I hug her, pressing her head against my chest, and her jacket mufles her cries.

"But... why did you go to jail if he was attacking you?" my mom asks.

Faith sits back up and wipes her tears away. She tries to speak, but she chokes. She clears her throat and tries again. "Because... He was on the city council, and he claimed that I attacked him for no reason." Faith's voice was bitter. "Who the hell was the jury gonna believe? An outstanding member of the city council, or some young girl who's always gettin' into trouble? He scared the other kids so much that they wouldn't testify against him. So, I got a year and a half in juvie. I got out on good behavior, and I'm still on probation. The funny thing is, he tried to fuckin' _rape_ me, and I did time in juvie while he got elected to fuckin' _mayor_." Faith growled.

"Wait... you mean...?" My mom asked.

"Yeah. The pervert who tried to rape me? His name was Richard. Richard Wilkins the third." Faith wiped her tears away again. "I stay away from him now. If I try to go anywhere near him, he'll probably claim I'm tryin' to attack him again, and I'll go right back to juvie. Or, they'll keep me in a jail cell for the next couple of months, then send me to prison when I turn eighteen. Then again, if I went anywhere near him... I probably _would_ attack him or somethin'... I... I still have nightmares."

My mom standsup and helps Faith to her feet. At first, I'm about toprotest, because I thik my mom's about to throw Faith out of the house, but then she hugs her. My mom wraps her arms around Faith and hugs her.

Faith is just as stunned as I am, then her tears come back even fiercer than before, and she hugs my mom back. She's crying hysterically into my mom's blouse, drenching her shoulder, and suddenly, I'm right behind her, hugging both of them.

I certainly didn't expect _this_ when I introduced Faith to my mom, but I think my mom at least approves of her.

Suddenly, Faith realeases my mom, and that lets us know it's time to separate. She steps off to the side and shoves her hands in her pockets.

"I, um... I'd better go..." Faith says.

"Why don't you stay for dinner, at least?" My mom asks, and Faith blushes.

"I'd like to, Ms. Summers, but my foster moms will be expectin' be in about twenty minutes ago, so I gotta jet... I mean, I need to get home."

"Well, maybe you can call them..." I suggest, but Faith looks like she really needs some time alone, so she shakes her head, and says no thanks. I don't push it, so I walk her to the door.

"Oh, here's your jacket..." I say, sliding it off my shoulders, but Faith smiles.

"Hey, why don't you keep it?" I smile and hug the jacket to my chest, and she kisses me goodnight and steps off the porch into the night.

...

"Well, that was certainly... eventful..." Mom says.

"Yeah. Who knew that about her?" Dawn asks, and suddenly, we realize she was eavesdropping on us.

"Dawn!" I scream, and I chase after her. I'm super pissed.

"Buffy, let her go." Mom says, instead, stomping up the stairs after Dawn herself. At the top of the staircase, she turns to me. "I'm not going to say I like Faith. I'm not going to say I _don't_ like her. I... I need time to process... what just happened."

"Yeah... me too..." I agree.

"But... I'm not going to say you can't see her... If those first few seconds, and those last few seconds, are anything to judge by, you two seem to make each other very happy. So... the only thing I'm going to say is... be careful."

I nod in appreciation.

"Thanks, Mom."

Mom nods, then continues stomping up after Dawn.

I return to the living room and sit on the couch, staring at Faith's jacket in my hands.


	4. Chapter 4

I'm... What?

(Buffy's POV)

I don't see Faith at school the next morning.

_Maybe her alarm didn't go off._ I think. I walk up to Faith's friends, who are standing in their usual place just in front of the doors.

"Um, hey, guys. I was just wondering if you'd heard from Faith?"

One of the guys, the one who'd mistakenly called me her newest conquest about a week ago, speaks first.

"Nah. It's probably no big deal she's not here. She probably just overslept, is all. By the way, leather looks good on you." He grins.

"Thanks Jack." I smile back. I've actually grown kind of close to Faith's friends over the past week. They all look the part of the school bully, but they're all actually pretty cool guys. Even Willow and Xander get along with them, and have stopped hanging back whenever I walk up to them.

"No prob. Kinda surprized Faith let that thing out of her sight, though." Jack says, his grin fading for a second, thinking. Then he's almost glaring at me. "She must really care about you. So don't hurt her, okay? Faith's been through a lot as it is. She don't need any heartbreak, okay?"

I'm surprized. All five of the guys are glaring at me, and I'm almost scared. Almost. But then I realize they're just looking out for Faith. They all really care about her. It's almost like they're some close-knit family.

"Don't worry about me. Hurting Faith is the last thing I want to do." I assure them. "I don't know how much more you guys know about her past than me, but I do know _some_ of the gorey details. Like about the Mayor."

"Holy shit, she told you about that?" Pete, another of Faith's friends, asked in astonishment. (Yes, Buffy Anne Summers _actually_ has a vocabulary. I used a four syllable word.)

"Yeah. Last night. She told me the whole story."

"Well then, that's not even half the shit she's been through. That's one of the worse things that's happened to her since she came _here_, but a lot of shit happened before that, too. Before she started fosterin' with the Hopes."

"Her foster parents' last name is Hope?"

"Yeah."

"So legally, her last name is Hope?"

"Well, it depends, really. I mean, a lot of fosters take their foster parents' last name, but a lot of 'em don't. Faith doesn't. Mainly because, well, hello "I'm Faith Hope"? Really?"

I laugh. "True. Doesn't sound very "Macho Girl"."

The guys laugh at that.

"No, it really doesn't." Jack agrees. "Anyway, take care of that jacket. Anything happens to it, and she'll never forgive you."

"This jacket is really important, isn't it?"

"Yeah." is all any of them will say. They refuse to elaborate. They've all got on solemn expressions now.

But their smiles return half-heartedly when Willow and Xander run up.

"Hey, Buff. Guys." Xander says with a grin.

"Where's Faith?" Willow asks.

"Don't know. She probably overslept, I guess." I reply, and I find I'm hugging Faith's jacket to me now, like I'm trying to protect it.

"Well, that sounds like something she'd do." Willow agrees. "So how'd last night go?"

"It was amazing. She was really sweet, and actually pretty romantic. Then, she walked me home, and she met my mom."

Everyone's eyes just about pop out of their sockets when I say that. Sometimes, it's really frustrating being the new girl, because everyone, even my friends, know my girlfriend better than me.

"What?! She met Mrs. Summers?!" Xander asks incredulously. (And yes, that's a FIVE syllable word! No, my brain does not hurt.)

"Ms, actually. Not Mrs. anymore. The divorce was finalized last week. And yeah, Faith met Mom."

"How did _that_ go?" Jason, one of Faith's friends asks.

"It went... okay... That's actually how I found out about... you know what." I say to the Leathers. That's what I call Faith's friends, 'cause they all wear tons of leather.

"Whoa, so your _mom_ knows about that?"

"Yeah."

"Damn. Look, I meant what I said. Don't hurt her. Faith's, like, our sister. We've all been friends since she came to this town, and we don't take kindly to people screwin' around with her." Jack says, and Willow and Xander just look around, not understanding what's going on now. But also, thankfully, not asking.

"And I meant what I said. Hurting Faith is the last thing I want to do."

The Leathers nod at me, then we all head inside as the morning bell rings.

But, I stop just inside the doorway when my phone rings. I look at the Caller ID. It's Faith.

Excited, I tell Willow and Xander not to wait up for me, that I'm just going to check in with Faith.

"Hello? What's up, Faith?" I ask with a smile as I answer the phone outside.

_"Are you Buffy?" _A woman's voice asks. She sounds like she's been crying. _"Faith's girlfriend?"_

"Yeah. That's me." I'm worried now. Why would a crying woman be calling me with Faith's phone?

_"My name is Linda Hope. Faith's foster mom. She asked me to call you."_

"Why? Is something wrong?"

_"She wants to see you. She's been asking for you since she woke up."_

"Woke up? What's going on?"

_"She was... attacked... Walking home last night. She's in the hospital. She wants you to come to her."_

My heart jumps up in my throat, and I fight back tears.

"Is... Is she alright?"

The other end of the line is silent. Then, _"Just come to the hospital when you can. Finish school first, if you have to."_ With that, Linda Hope hangs up.

Finishing school is one thing I do _not_ intend to do today. I call my mom and have her pick me up. She understands that this is more important than learning... triangular... equations. Or whatever the hell they teach in math these days.

...

I'm at the front desk now.

"Hey, what room is Faith Lehane's?" I ask the lady at the desk.

"Are you family?"

"Well... not really. I'm her girlfriend. Her foster mom called and told me to get here when I can."

The lady hits a few keys on her keyboard.

"Second floor, room 213." The lady says a few clicks of the mouse and a couple key taps later.

"Thank you." I say, then head for the nearest elevator, my mom right behind me.

The elevator is taking too long, so I find the stairs instead. Mom sticks with the elevator, and I almost literally bump into her when I pass the elevator on the second floor.

I quickly find room 213 and see two women holding each other, and four other kids standing in the hallway. I guess this is her family.

"Hi, you must be Buffy. I'm Linda." I recognize the woman's voice from the phone.

"And I'm Carrie." her other foster mom said.

"I'm Buffy." I offer, and I turn to look in the window. Faith looks bad.

"She fell asleep again soon after I called you. She asked that we let you in as soon as you get here, whether she's asleep or not." Linda said, reaching for the door handle.

"Um... maybe... maybe I'd better let her sleep?" I suggest.

"Well, let her sleep then, but go on in. She'll want you beside her when she wakes up." Carrie replied, and I nod.

I walk inside the room, and Linda closed the door behind me. It's just me and Faith now.

I sit down next to her bed and let the tears fall. She looks really bad. Her face is all banged up, the doctors have her arm braced, and I'm pretty sure I can see some kind of bandage peeking out from under the sheets around her chest. I think that means her ribs are broken.

I'm crying beside her for almost ten minutes before she wakes up.

"Mmmh?" She moans, her eyes slowly opening, and she tries to sit up. I gently push her back down.

"Don't move, Faith. I'm here. I'm here, Faith." I assure her.

"B?" She moans.

"Yeah. I'm here. Don't worry."

"I'm glad you're here." She says. I nod.

"I'm here, Faith. You can sleep, if you want."

Faith slowly shakes her head. "No. Don't wanna sleep."

I nod. "Okay, baby. Whatever you want... Um... what happened?"

"I don't know." Faith replies. "I was just walkin' home from your place, and some guy jumped me. I don't remember much like that but hurtin'. A lot. I'm still hurtin' a lot."

"I haven't spoken to a doctor yet, but it looks like you'll be fine. I don't know about anything really bad internally, but you've got... a couple bruises on your face... maybe a couple broken ribs... and maybe a broken arm. I haven't moved the blankets or anything to check the rest of you out, but..." Faith smiles.

"Damn. My own girlfriend doesn't even wanna check me out."

I laugh a little.

"Well, maybe I will once your a little less... hospital Faith."

"Hold ya to that." Faith joked. I guess she's not in too much pain, so I can...

"Oof!" She grunts as I throw my arms around her and sob into the blankets.

"I was so worried about you! Don't _ever_ scare me like that again!"

I can feel Faith's chest shaking under me, so I sit up to make sure I didn't hurt her. The bitch is laughing.

"What the _hell_ is so funny?"

"You are. God, you should see yourself right now!" Faith is still laughing, even though she's wincing from the pain of it. "You'd think I was lyin' on my deathbed or somethin'!"

"Well, I don't know! You might be!" I say angrily, though as I watch Faith lying there, laughing, it seems highly unlikely that she's about to die. And so, suddenly, I'm laughing, despite myself.

"Damn, B! Gotta tell you, though, it feels good to have people worry about me. Makes me feel like they actually care about me."

"I _do_ care about you. I lo-... You're my girlfriend, I really like you."

Faith's hesitant. "B... were you about to... were you about to say the "L" word?"

"No." I laugh it off, even though I clearly almost said it.

"Right." Faith agrees. "'Cause just 'cause I'm lyin' in the hospital don't mean either of us is ready for that. We may _think_ we are, but we're not."

"Agreed." I say with a nod.

"But you can feel free to kiss me now." Faith joked.

"Thank God." I joke back, and lean over to kiss her softly on the lips. It only lasts a few seconds, but kissing Faith is one of my favorite things to do.

"Do the guys know?" Faith asks after a few minutes.

"No. Mrs. Linda called me just as everyone was heading in for the morning bell."

"Wait, you mean you ditched school to come see me?"

"Yeah."

"Damn, you didn't need to do that."

"Yes, I did. Mrs. Linda said you were asking for me. Plus, there's no way I would've even been able to concentrate on school if I was worried about you."

"Well, I'm fine now. So get back to school already, okay?"

I recoil. "You... You don't want me here?"

"That's not what I said. But you can't just ditch school every time I get into some trouble."

"Faith, missing one day isn't going to hurt my GPA. And I can make up for today. I'll get my assignments for the day tomorrow and do it tomorrow. But I'm not going to leave you."

Defeated, Faith nods, then changes the subject.

"So you been takin' care of my jacket?" She asks, and I laugh.

"Yeah. Not a scratch on it. No stains, rips, tears, or anything of the sort." I assure her, spinning so she can see.

She licks her lips. "Damn. Leather looks _really_ good on ya, B."

I grin. "That's what Jack said."

She pales. "Was he hittin' on you?"

"Not really, no. Just a little harmless flirting, that's all." I say with a smile.

"Harmless flirting?"

"Faith, I'm a lesbian. That means _no_ guys. _Whatsoever_. You don't need to worry about Jack stealing me away from you."

Faith relaxes. "Good. He can't have you."

I grin at her possessiveness. "And actually... he and the others kinda warned me not to hurt you." I admit.

She looks away. "Yeah... They're kinda protective, ya know?"

"I think it's great that you have such great friends."

She smiles and looks back at me. She was afraid I was mad at them for it.

"Yeah. They're awesome." She thinks for a second. "Most of the time, anyway." She adds after a minute.

I chuckle.

"You know, your friends are pretty cool too." Faith says.

"You think so?"

"Yeah. They've been really cool about everything since we started goin' out. Sure, there's the occasional comment about my past with girls, but it's nothin' I didn't expect. Plus, Xan knows his superheroes, ya know?"

I laugh. Ever since we started dating, any time she's with me, Willow and Xander, Faith and Xander start doing back and forth about the best superheroes.

"Yeah. I figured you appreciated that. Since that's all the two of you ever talk about."

She smiles sheepishly.

"Sorry. Had a rough life, ya know? Comic books are kind of an escape."

"Don't worry. I get it. To each her own, right? You and Xander have comic books, Willow has... _book_ books, and I have romantic movies."

Faith frowned. "Thought you were gonna say you have me?"

"Well, I do, but you're not just an escape. You're my girlfriend."

"Yeah, but isn't that what the chick always says to the guy in those romantic movies?"

"Well, yeah, but... wait, you watch romantic movies?"

"Not really. Just a lucky guess." Faith says quickly. Too quickly.

I laugh out loud. "Oh my God! My "Macho Girl", super-butch, lesbian biker girlfriend likes romantic movies!"

"Shut up!" Faith hissed, looking around for security cameras. "Damn, B! Not so loud! Gotta rep to protect!"

I hold my hands up in surrender.

"You do realize now that there's no way your getting out of watching chick flicks at the movies, right?"

She groans.

I look out the windows and see that my mom and Faith's foster family is gone. We're alone.

"So... How bad does it hurt?"

"How bad does what hurt?" Faith asks.

"You. How bad does..." I motion to her entire body, "this hurt?"

"It's not as bad, now that you're here to take the edge off."

"That doesn't answer my question."

Faith sighs. "When I talked to the doctor, he said I have four broken ribs, a fractured radius, a minor concussion, my nose is broken, two black eyes, three missing teeth, a fractured tibia, and major bruising all over my body, and... it hurts a lot. But like I said, with you here, it takes the edge off."

"What else?"

"What do you mean?"

"I'm not some stupid blonde, Faith. You paused. What else is there? Internal bleeding? What?"

Faith lets a few tears fall before she answers.

"Doc says there's evidence of sexual assault."

I gasp._ Faith was... raped?_


	5. Chapter 5

I'm... What?

(Buffy's POV)

"You... you mean..." Faith nods, and the tears are back in her eyes. She hugs herself, trying to separate from the world.

"I... I don't remember it, but... I can feel it... I feel... violated..."

I feel my anger rising. And it's rising _fast_. I have to let some of it out, or I'll explode. I get up and Faith's afraid I'm going to walk away, leave her. Damaged goods.

Instead, I go to the window and open it. When I feel the fresh air hit me in the face, something happens other than what I was going to do. I throw my head out the window and vomit. I'm gagging, and choking, and coughing, and my meals from the last three days make their way to the ground two stories below me. Finally, I feel empty, and I know I'm done, so I do what I was coming over here to do. I lift my head to the sky and I scream.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!" Everyone within a mile of the hospital starts looking for the source of the noise, but I don't care.

When I look back inside, Faith is rocking back and forth, sobbing. She doesn't realize it, but she's scratching herself, like she's trying to scrub herself clean. She feels filthy, and I feel guilty for leaving her over there, alone. I close the window and walk back over to her. I sit down on the bed beside her, then lay down and hold her. And we cry together.

...

I'm shaken awake by my mom. I yawn, rub my eyes, and look over at Faith beside me. She's shivering, even though she's covered up and she has my body warmth around me. She whimpers in her sleep, and I know she's dreaming about... _it_.

I shake her awake, knowing that missing out on sleep is better than dreaming about _that_.

"AAH!" She screams, sitting up when I finally get her awake.

"Shh..." I whisper, holding her. "It's okay, Faith."

She calms down immediately when she hears my voice.

"B?"

"Yeah, it's me."

"How long was I out?"

"I don't know." I admit. "I kind of crashed, too."

"I came in, and you two looked so peaceful together, I didn't want to wake you. That was earlier this morning. It's almost six o' clock now." My mom says, concerned.

"You fell asleep with me? The whole day?" Faith asks.

"I guess so." I reply.

"Well, honey, it's time to go." Mom says to me. Faith starts to panic, and I squeeze her.

"Mom, can I come back once I get a shower and a change of clothes? I... I'd kind of prefer to stay with Faith tonight."

Mom sighs, unsure, but seeing Faith's condition, knowing we're probably not going to be doing anything... extracurricular... "Well... I'll have to talk it over with her foster parents and the doctors first, but... I don't have a problem with it." She nods, heading out the door. "Let me just go ask them."

I nod, and I turn back to Faith, who's relaxed a little bit, but not much.

"I promise, Faith, even if I can't stay tonight, I'll be back tomorrow. If you want, I'll even skip school, and stay the whole day with you."

"No. You need to go to school. But... come back straight after?"

"I promise." I nod, and my mom walks back in, smiling slightly.

"They don't have a problem with it. Carrie says they were planning on leaving someone here overnight to keep an eye on her, anyway, and after being told... what happened... she really only calmed down when you showed up."

So my mom knows, too. What really happened to Faith.

"So... they _want_ me to stay with her?" I ask.

"Yes. They said it might be best with you here. So, I'll take you home so you can get something to eat, get a shower, and get some pajamas for tonight, then I'll bring you right back."

I nod, smiling. Faith tenses up again when I get up, but I give her a quick, soft kiss, and assure her that I'll be back.

"Just don't go to sleep until I get back. I don't want you having that nightmare again." I say worriedly.

"How... How'd you know?" Faith asks.

"You were calling out in your sleep. Making noises."

"Oh." She's blushing furiously now.

"Well, we'd better go now." Mom says, and I nod. Faith tenses up as I get up off the bed, so I lean over and kiss her softly, assuring her that I'll be back.

"Don't worry, baby." I say with a smile, and she relaxes slightly, but hugs herself anyway.

...

I get a shower as soon as I get home, and Mom fixes dinner while I'm showering. I eat quickly, and throw some pajamas in a bag. I don't care what I grabbed, I just want to get back to Faith as fast as I can.

...

Faith is talking to Carrie when I get back to her room. My mom just dropped me off outside the hospital.

"-so we'll talk to the police tomorrow. But tonight, just rest." Carrie was saying as I walked in. Faith's eyes brighten as soon as she sees me, and Carrie nods as she walks out of the room. "You two have a good night's rest tonight." She says, closing the door behind her.

"I need to change." I say to Faith as I head for the bathroom. I close the door and change quickly, then leave the bathroom and crawl into bed beside Faith.

"B?" She asks, and I look up at her.

"Yeah?"

"You... You still like me... right?" She asks, very afraid of my answer.

"Of course!" I say, smiling. "Why wouldn't I?"

"Because... you know..."

"Because you were... attacked?" Faith nods. "Faith, I really care about you. I really do. I'm not going to stop liking you just because of... _that_. I l... I like you."

"Then... I'm not just... damaged goods?"

"No! Of course not! Something bad happened to you. You didn't do anything bad. And the police are going to find whoever did it to you, and you won't have to worry about it anymore. I... I know we agreed we're not ready to actually say the "L word" yet, but... I want you to know that I do."

"Do what?"

"I... "L word"... you. I do. I "L word" you." Faith smiles and her eyes fill with tears of happiness when I say that.

"I "L word" you, too." Faith chokes out, and I wipe the tears away. But they're falling from my eyes, too, and suddenly, we're crying together, holding each other tighter and tighter.

...

I wake up the next morning and look at Faith to find her sleeping soundly, no traces of a nightmare at all. I smile and brush her hair out of her face. It's hard to believe we've only been dating a week. It's been a very eventful week, both good and bad. Next week we might be getting married! Obviously that's an exaggeration, but I think that we're probably going to be slowing down soon, otherwise we'll go through everything major in a relationship in a month's time.

Faith slowly stirs as I stare at her, and she looks back at me curiously.

"What?" She asks.

"You're so beautiful." I way with a smile.

She smiles for a split second before it fades again.

"Faith... We're going to get through this, okay? Together."

Faith nods sleepily and presses herself against me.

"Damn it." She says, and I back up, curious.

"What? What did I do?"

"I don't know. That's what I'm tryin' to figure out. What the hell have you done to me? I'm supposed to be some big, butch, macho, tough girl or somethin'. A real Hell's Angel biker chick, and here I am, all fuckin' lovey-dovey with you. I'm a fuckin' girl." I laugh, and she looks up at me. "It's not funny."

"Sorry, it's just... Hearing you say "lovey-dovey"..."

She blushes. "Shut up, would ya?" But I can tell she's laughing inside.

"I'm here for you, though. Anything you need." I promise her. Then, I look at the clock. And groan. "Anything you need... _after school_. I need to get home and get ready."

"You're coming back right after, though, right?" Faith asked, panicking again.

"Of course." I reply incredulously. Why wouldn't she think I'm coming back. I kiss her. "You don't really even need to ask. Of course I'm coming back right after."

She nods, still looking unsure.

"Hey. I promise. I'm coming back. If I'm not back here by four o' clock, then just assume that I'm lying dead in a ditch somewhere." I joke, but her eyes grow wide. "Whoa! Kidding! I'll be back by four." I kiss her again and put yesterday's clothes back on in the bathroom, putting my pajamas back in my bag. I give her one more quick kiss and promise her once more that I'll be back later today, then I leave.

...

"So how is she, anyway?" Will asks me. The news that Faith was attacked spread through the school like wildfire. While no one knows about exactly what _kind_ of attack it was, there's a lot of mixed reactions from the student body concerning the "incident". Most people are indifferent.

"Really? That sucks. Hmm... Wonder what's for lunch today?"

Some of them are actually celebrating. Assholes.

"Really? It's about time someone knocked her down to size. She deserves it." (cough cough *Cordelia*)

But there are a few, mostly Xan, Will and the Leathers, who are really angry about it.

"She's... doing... okay, I guess." I reply. "As good as we can expect, anyways. She's really shaken up about it, and she's really hurting. She won't say it, but I know she's afraid that whoever did it is going to come back for her."

"Was it some kind of mugging?" Xander asks. "I mean, was she missing anything?"

_Probably better let them think it was a mugging. Faith can straighten it out if she wants to when she gets back. _"Um... yeah. About... fifty bucks."

"Damn. Guess she should be glad she wasn't carrying any more than that. Could have been much worse."

"Yeah. Or worse, it could have not been a mugging at all." Willow says, and I pale.

"Yeah. Lucky her."

"Oh! I didn't mean she's lucky... because, hello, mugged. But still, she could have been carrying several hundred in her wallet. Imagine losing several hundred dollars instead of only fifty."

"Yeah. Money. That sucks." The morning bell rings, and I manage to make it through Biology before I start worrying about Faith. She could be freaking out right now, and I'm not there to calm her down. The doctors might have to knock her out or something. Algebra and History go by, and I barely even notice them, I'm too busy worrying about Faith. I'm thinking about skipping the lunch hour and just running up to the hospital just to check in for a minute, but I have to stop thinking about that while I'm in gym.

We're freestyling in gym today, so basically, we get to decide what we're doing. Of course, the majority vote is dodgeball. Meaning the five jocks in the class voted dodgeball and no one else wanted to vote against them. So, we're playing dodgeball, and two people stand up to choose teams. It's Mark Hartman, the guy Faith said was being scouted by the Major Leaguers or whatever it's called. Anyway, he's one team captain, and Jack, Faith's friend, is the other.

"Summers." Mark calls, looking dead at me, and winks. Dawn steps forward, though, and I thank god my sister has a crush on the guy. Somehow, I think he was planning on hitting on me. He scowls and I look over at Jack. Unfortunately, though, Jason is also in this class, so Jack calls on him without thinkng about it.

"Summers." Mark calls again, grinning. I groan as Iwalk over to him, keeping Dawn between us, but he walks around her and stands by me, and for some reason, Dawn blames _me_ for that, so _I'm_ the one she glares at.

Once the teams are called, Mark immediately decides to stand by me.

"So, Summers, don't suppose you've reconsidered the whole "lezbo" thing have you?" He asks, like it's some really clever line he just came up with on the spot, even though he's probably been working on that "whopper" of a pick-up line for about ten minutes.

"Nope. Not really." I growl as I throw my ball and hear the whistle blowed as it connects, sending a member of the other team out.

"Hmm. Really? 'Cause the way you were looking at me a few minutes ago, I think you have."

"Is that so?"

"Yeah." He throws his ball. Whistle blows. "I think you're just playing hard to get. So, I'm going to save us both a lot of time and say I'll pick you up after school today and we'll go have some fun."

"You will, will you?"

"Oh yeah." He grins, like he's already won. Like it's guaranteed he's getting into my pants.

"Well, there's a problem with that."

"Oh? What problem?"

"I'm gay, remember? I have a girlfriend. Plus, aren't you dating Cordelia?"

"Oh, that's so over. Both of them."

"What do you mean "both of them"? Last I checked, there was only one Cordelia."

"I mean me and Cordelia and you and that Faith chick."

I throw my new ball. Whistle blows. A second whistle blows as Mark throws his new ball.

"Faith and I are still together."

"Really? Last I heard, she went and got herself raped in an alley." I freeze.

"Why do you think that?"

"Heard it around school. It's what everyone thinks happened. No one _really_ believes it was just a mugging. Lot of people think she got raped. There are some, though, that think it was consentual. Said she _wanted_ it to happen, and that she _liked _it. Why would you want to date damaged goods like that?"

I can't stop myself. The very next thing I know, Mark is on the ground holding his nose, his blood pooling on the floor, and a spot of his blood on my fist. I can't control myself. I'm suddenly on top of him, my fist plowing into his face until several strong arms yank me off of him.

"Get off of me!" I scream, trying to get back to Mark so I can murder his filthy, lying ass.

"Crazy slut! What the hell was that for?!" Mark screams at me, and his buddies, including my sister, are helping him to his feet, glaring at the crazy bitch who viciously attacked him for no reason.

...

Faith looks at the clock by her bed. 5:30 pm. Buffy is an hour and a half late. She's not coming. Why would she? Faith was broken. Damaged goods. Why would anyone want to date a girl when all they see when they're around them is a girl that let some guy she'd never known fuck her? Faith had been raped. She didn't deserve Buffy, anyway. Why would Buffy stick around with her?

But even knowing that, why did it hurt so much? Had she really _expected_ Buffy to stay with her?


	6. Chapter 6

I'm... What?

(Faith's POV)

My fosters walk into the room with a couple of cops. They all stare at me with that look that I'm very quickly growin' tired of. Pity. Yeah, it sucks, and I'm scared, and I'm pissed. I'm not in a good sitch, I get that, but I don't want anyone's pity. I'd thought Buffy was different. She didn't look at me with pity. The way she looked at me, she wasn't feelin' sorry for me, she wasn't pityin' me, it seemed like she took this attack on me personally. Like she saw it as an attack on her, too, and she wanted revenge. My kinda girl. But I guess I was wrong about her. She's no different from anyone. Just took me longer to figure that out.

"Faith, these officers are here to run some DNA tests. They want to see if the man who... who attacked you... left some evidence... inside you." Carrie explains, and I roll my eyes.

"Fuck that." I say.

"Excuse me?" Carrie looks confused. They all do.

"Look, I got _raped_. Not _attacked_, _raped_. Just say it, will ya? Stop tryin' ta beat around the bush. I'm not gonna take offense if ya decide ta be blunt about it, okay? Now, about this DNA testin', ain't no way in hell Imma let some cop swab me for DNA, or however the hell it's done."

"Well, if you would feel more comfortable, you could provide the swabs yourself. We just want to be very thorough in this investigation, Ms. Lehane." The guy cop explains. "We take sexual assault on minors very seriously."

"Right." I roll my eyes. "'Cept when the assault just happens to have happened on a delinquent like me."

"I'm sorry?"

"Look, it's not the first time this happened. Sure, it's the first time some guy's actually _succeeded_, but someone's tried to rape me before, and I got arrested for defendin' myself. Did time in juvie. So excuse me for no exactly trustin' that shield you're wearin'."

"Ms. Lehane, I'm sure you-" The lady cop begins. Damn, she's actually kinda hot.

"No, you're not sure of anythin'. Unless you've been in my exact position before, you don't know shit."

"Faith." Linda warns. I roll my eyes, but I don't say another word.

"You're right." The lady cop continues. "You're absolutely right. I never have been in your exact position before. But I've seen girls like you who have. More than I should have, in fact. I've seen too many girls in your position. You're angry now. You're scared, thinking that at any time, the one who did this to you is going to come back and do it again. You're angry that this happened to you, that your luck is just so horrible that something likethis could happen to you. And you're scared that the man who did this is going to get away with it, and be free to do it again, whether to you or to someone else. And you're scared that you're going through this alone. But that's our job, you see. We're here to help you. We're here to investigate and make sure that the sick bastard that did this gets his just desserts. We're here to make sure that you don't have to go through this alone. But we need your help to do that. We need to run some DNA tests. If he has a criminal record at all, then DNA could go a long way to convicting him and getting him sent to prison for a very long time, if not for the rest of his miserable life."

Okay, now I'm impressed. Not used to hearin' cops talk like that. And she sounds like she really is on my side in this. So, I decide to go out on a limb and trust her.

"I like you." I say, my mouth turnin' up at the corners for a slight smile. "You keep it real. I like that. Plus, you're hot, so that's a plus." Blunt and to the point. That's me.

She actually blushes at that.

"Oh, um... well... thank you."

"Hey, don't worry. Not comin' onto ya or anythin'. Prefer my girls to be around my own age. Just sayin', you're not that bad lookin'."

Her partner is tryin', and failin', to keep from laughin'. She notices and punches him in the arm.

"Shut up!" She hisses, which only succeeds in makin' him laugh more. Carrie and Linda are lookin' at them like they're sick for jokin' around and havin' a good time in front of a rape victim, because I'll probably never be happy again. I catch their eyes and smile reassuringly. God, bein' around them is depressin' me now.

"So how's this DNA thing work, anyway?" I ask.

...

I'm leavin' the hospital now. Once the cops left, my fosters checked me out. In the silence we're walkin' in, I think about Buffy. I feel the sadness and anger come back up.

_How could she do this? She promised she'd be here. Why did she lie? Was she just tryin' to spare my feelings? God, I shoulda known she was disgusted at the sight of me. Who'd love someone like me? I am just damaged goods now._

"Am I goin' back to school tomorrow?" I ask the fosters.

"Do you want to?" Linda asks.

"Kinda. Just wanna get things back to normal, ya know?"

"Okay. You want one of us to give you a ride, or do you want to ride the bus?"

"Thought I'd just walk tomorrow. Could use the exercise, ya know? Been lyin' down in bed for a couple days now, kinda wanna get up and get the blood flowin'."

"Okay. So what do you want for dinner?"

"What do we have?"

"Chicken."

"Hmm... Lemme think for a minute." It's kind of a ritual between me and Linda. Chicken is all we ever have, because it's all we can afford. But I ask her anyway, 'cause it's just somethin' we've always done. I appreciate her effort to do somethin' normal.

"Take your time."

"Think I'd like pizza tonight."

"Chicken it is."

...

I sit up in bed slowly and look at my phone by my bed. Buffy's callin'. I hit mute on the screen and turn back over, goin' to sleep. After a minute, the light dies on the phone, signalin' that the call ended. I close my eyes and try to go back to sleep, but the light comes back on and I look at the phone again. She's callin' again.

I ignore it and close my eyes, but the light comes back on again almost immediately after the call ended. She's not givin' up, is she?

I ignore it one more time, and the light doesn't come back on. I sigh, and I swear, I'm actually a bit disappointed, but I'm too tired to really care. So, I fall back to sleep, only to be woken up what seems like seconds later by a tappin' on the window. I scramble to the head of the bed, thinkin' that the guy that raped me was back to do it again. The tapin' stops for a minute, and my phone lights up. I pick it up and answer immediately when I see Buffy's name.

"B!" I whisper. "There's someone outside my window!"

Then, the bitch laughs. She fuckin' _laughs_ at me!

"What the hell is so funny about that?!" I hiss.

_"Faith, it's me. _I'm_ ouside your window. So come on and open up, would you? It's cold out here."_

I relax and say okay. I catch my breath as I walk across the room and open the window. She's right, it is cold out. She crawls into my room, shiverin'. She's wearin' my jacket.

"Where the hell were you earlier today?" I ask angrily. "You said you'd be there by four. You never came."

"That's what I want to talk about. Faith, I am _so_ sorry about that. This guy at school was talking shit about you, and I just kind of lost it, so I got detention after school."

I feel my anger subside a bit.

"Oh."

"Yeah, I'm sorry, Faith. I would have been there if I could have, and I would have been there sooner, but my mom picked me up after detention, and wouldn't let me out of the house before she yelled at me for being so stupid and starting a fight at school. She yelled for a couple hours before I could explain it. Then, I convinced her to take me to the hospital to visit you, but you'd already left. We went home and ate and stuff, then I came straight here after you wouldn't answer my calls. I figured you were mad at me, so I had to come here and explain." Buffy took a couple minutes to catch her breath, then she hugged me. "I'm sorry, Faith. I wanted to call and let you know what happened, but the teacher that I served detention with is totally anti-gay, so she wouldn't let me call my lesbian girlfriend."

"I get it. I'm sorry I got pissed at you. Thought you'd changed your mind about me bein' damaged goods."

"No! God, you mean so much to me, Faith. I'm not going to abandon you like that. You need me now. I'm not going to ignore that. I love you too... much..." We both freeze as we realize what she just said. She pulls back and looks me in the eye.

(Buffy's POV)

I pull back from Faith, and I can see the panic in her eyes, but I'm too stunned myself to say anything.

"I-I-I..." I stammer.

"B... We... we agreed..."

"Yeah... I-I-I know... it... it j-just kind of... you know?"

"Then you didn't mean it?"

"No. Yes... God, I'm so confused!"

"Tell me about it."

"Is... Is it... bad? That I said it? Even by accident?"

"B... I've never had that kinda relationship. Every single little milestone I make with you is a first for me. It... It makes me uncomfortable... I mean, not tryin' to put ya down or somethin', I just mean... It feels wierd... Bein' like this with someone. With you... Bein' around a girl like this... Not havin' sex... With real feelings involved. It's new, and nine times outta ten, I don't know what I'm doin'. Don't know when I make a mistake, or when I do somethin' right. You're the first girl I've been with that I actually care about. But... I'm just not ready for that word, B."

"I understand. I'm sorry. It just slipped out. And, just so you know, you're not alone. This is all new to me, too. I've had a girlfriend before, but not like this. Not like you."

Faith nods in understanding.

"So... um... it's late... maybe I should go..." I say, glancing towards the window, but I think Faith sees that I really don't want to go, and I don't think she wants me to, either.

"Or... Or you could stay... just for a little while..."

I nod, smiling. "I can do that."

Faith nods, grateful.

"So... what you wanna do?" I ask.

"Um... Talk? Talking's good." Faith suggests.

"Yeah. We can talk... About what?"

"Um... how about you? I'd like to talk about you, if that's okay."

"Oh please, I love talking about myself." I joke, trying to break the tension. She laughs slightly and sits down on her bed, against the wall. I sit down in front of her. "So... what do you want to know?"

"Um... How long have you known you're into girls?"

"Um... Well... I'm not certain, but I think it all started when I was spending the night with a friend one night, and I accidentally walked in on her when she was in the middle of changing. I think I was thirteen. She was just beginning to blossom, you know, and by that time, I was beginning to be a bit curious about sex, and... I remember freezing in surprize, and we just stared at each other for a bit, and then I remember trying to calm her down, because she was freaking out, and I told her she was beautiful, and it just kind of clicked. She blushed, then she kissed me, and I kised her back, and... It never went any farther than that. After that night, we just stayed friends and never really spoke about it again. But I think that's when I realized I was a lesbian. I didn't really know that's what it was called, but I knew that I liked girls, not guys."

Faith was smiling. "Kinda figured it was somethin' like that. Kind of innocent, ya know? You just seem like that typa person."

"Yeah... Innocence... That's me."

"What?"

"Well, you said I seem like an innocent person. I was agreeing."

"Okay, somehow, I get the feelin' that there's a double meanin' in there somewhere."

"Well... it's just that... That girl I told you about? My one and only girlfriend? The one that went crazy? We never, um... you know..." I click my tongue suggestively.

"So... you never slept with her?"

"No. Never."

"What about other girls?"

"I just told you. She was my only girlfriend."

"Yeah, but... Wait, you mean... You're a...?"

"Yeah. Like I said. Never had sex with her. Only girlfriend."

"You've never had sex before?"

"No. Never."

Faith slinks back in surprise. "Damn. When I said you seemed innocent, I had no idea _how_ innocent."

"Yeah..." I blush. We fall silent for a while, then Faith realizes we're both sitting on her bed, and she's only wearin a bra and thin pajama bottoms. She jumps up off the bed, like she's afraid I thought she was trying to seduce me, and she shies away from the bed, blushing.

"Oh, sorry." She says. I smile, laughing at her nervousness.

"Don't worry about it. It's no big deal."

"Of course it is!" Faith says, and my heart sinks.

_She doesn't like being with a virgin._

"Oh..."

"No! I don't mean it like that! I just mean... If it came down to it, and you and I... ya know... I don't want your first time to be just some random encounter. I want it to be nice. Special."

Tears come to my eyes, and I'm filled with happiness. She actually wants to make my first time _special_.

"Faith, it will be special, no matter where it is. Just as long as it's with you." I stand up and walk over to her, putting my arms around her and kissing her sweetly.

"Sorry..." Faith apologizes for freaking out. "I just don't wanna take your... ya know... in the back of some car or somethin'. I wanna make a big deal about it. I wanna do the whole nine yards thing. The candles, the soft music, rose petals, doin' it gentle. I wanna make it perfect. Memorable."

I laugh, loving how romantic my girlfriend is.

"But one thing, B... If _anyone_ finds out that I'm really the romantic typa girl, it'll stop, got it?" Faith jokes, but she's also a bit serious, so I lock my lips and throw the key away.

"Never going to breathe a word. Just don't stop being this romantic. I love that about you."

"Deal." She grins, and she kisses me again.

"You know, I just want you to know how amazing I think it is that you're actually willing to talk about stuff like this after what happened to you."

Her jaw sets itself, and I know that the moment's been ruined.

"Faith, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to upset you. I just mean-"

"Yeah. I know. I'm supposed to be curled up in a ball for months on end, refusin' to leave my bed 'cause I'm so scared of the world outside. I'm not supposed to ever wanna have sex again 'cause it'll always bring me back to that. Well guess what, B? I'm not like that. Yeah, I fuckin' hate that I got raped. I don't want it to happen again, but layin' around sulkin' all the time ain't gonna help anythin', B. I'm not gonna let bein' a rape victim stop me from havin' sex in the future, 'cause it's not always gonna be rape. I'm not gonna let the bad things in my life screw up the good things, okay? I don't mind talkin' about bein' raped. Yeah, I'm scared that whoever did it to me is gonna come back and do it again, or try somethin' else, like killin' me or somethin'. Fuck, I'm _terrified_ that that's gonna happen. I mean, you heard how I reacted when I thought that you were the guy when you were tappin' on my window. I'm not gonna lie. I'm fuckin' terrified. But... I'm gonna go to school tomorrow, I'm gonna tell anyone who asks what happened _exactly_ what happened. I'm not gonna act like it's no big deal, but I'm not gonna let it get to me, either. I'm gonna go to school, I'm gonna hang out with my girlfriend, I'm gonna shoot some shit with my friends, I'm gonna try not to nod off in class, I'm gonna kick the other team's ass at dodgeball in gym, then I'm gonna go get my license back so I can ride my bike again, and I'm gonna spend the next week or so tryin', and pretty much failin', to get you on the back of it so I can take you for a ride. Eventually, you're gonna cave, and you'll enjoy it so much you'll be beggin' me to take you for another ride. It'll annoy the hell outta me for a while, at least on the outside, but inside, I'll be lovin' the fact that you enjoy somethin' that I like. Life is gonna go on. I ain't gonna let anyone's life stop just 'cause somethin' bad happened to me."

I pick my jaw up off the floor and clear my throat. "Well, as long as you have a plan." I quip.

She smirks. "Yeah. Unfortunately, though, the fosters are forcin' me to talk to a shrink about it. Don't see the point, I mean, just talkin' to someone who's gonna be analyzin' every damn thing I say ain't gonna go back in time and stop me from gettin' raped. If I want to talk to someone about it, I'll talk to people that actually mean somethin' to me. People that actually _care_ about me, not just the paycheck they'll be gettin' to listen to me whine and complain for an hour each week. And the best therapy I can possibly get is seein' whatever bastard it was that raped me in handcuffs."

I nod in agreement, and I hold her tighter. I smile when I feel her arms tighten around me, too.


	7. Chapter 7

I'm... What?

(Buffy's POV)

I'm nervous. Very nervous. I had to leave early this morning so I could get ready for school. Faith wasn't happy about it, but she didn't argue. So, I left, and now I'm so nerouvs about how things are going to go with her today at school. I know she's strong, and she can handle a lot, but there are a lot of rumors going around school about her. Like, a _lot_. And most of them are close enough to the truth that I know they'll still bother her. And no one's really going to believe what she tells them, except for me and her friends.

But I'm sure she'll be fine. She does have some pretty tough friends, and she has at least one or two in every class. There's no way Faith or any of our friends are going to stand for people insulting her. Then again, I'm not reallyafraid of what people will say, because Faith _can_ take care of herself when it comes to stuff like that. What I'm really nervous about is Faith getting suspended or expelled for fighting.

But until we get to school, there's no point in getting worried, so I push thoughts like that out of my mind and finish getting ready. I decided to do something special for Faith today. Something to help take her mind off of everyone else but me. Something I think is going to leave her thinking about me _all day_. Because, let's face it, even though it's not really my style, I look _hot_ in these black leather skinny pants, red low-cut v-neck blouse, combat boots and Faith's leather jacket. The one she gave me a while back. I'm also wearing a pair of dark sunglasses as I walk out the door to catch a ride with Xander.

"Buff?" He asks, shocked at the way I'm dressed. Have I mentioned how leather is _so_ not my thing? And yet, it looks _damn_ hot on me.

"Yeah?" I ask innocently.

"Buff?" I hear behind me, and I look to see Willow in the back seat. Why she isn't in the passenger seat, I don't know.

"Yeah?"

"Um... Trying out for the part of the tanned cow in the school musical?"

"There's a musical?" I ask innocently again.

"Buffy, what are you wearing?" Willow asks hesitantly. She still hasn't gone back to the fuzzy sweaters and skirts. She's still actually dressing like she's proud of her body. I guess dating Xander has boosted her confidence in herself. That, plus the fact that nearly every boy in school is drooling over her now.

"Oh, this? Nothing much." I bite my lip, and they look at me expectantly. "Okay, fine. I swore I wouldn't mention this until you guys found out for yourself, but Faith is coming back to school today, and I just wanted to do something to take her mind off of everything. She's been trying to get me into leather pretty much since day one, and I thought this would make a good surprize."

"Well, _I_, for one, am _very_ surprized." Xander says, and Willow nods in agreement.

"Think she'll like it?" I ask nervously.

"Well, you know her better than we do, but I'm sure she'll be drooling." Willow says with a grin.

"Thanks, Will." I smile back. "Hey, why aren't you up here?"

"Oh. Force of habit. I'm so used to sitting in the back seat that I just automatically come back here."

"Oh. That's cool. I just figured, Xander's _your_ boyfriend, not mine, so..."

"Good point." Willow says. "Outta my seat." She orders, and I smile, rolling my eyes as Willow and I get out of the car and trade seats. Willow looks back at me and winks once we're both buckled in, and she's holding Xander's hand. I laugh back at her just as Xander pulls away from the driveway and down the street.

...

I'm sitting on the steps by Faith's friends, waiting for her to show up. We've got about ten minutes left before class, and I'm hoping to spend at least five minutes making out with Faith.

Speak of the devil, here she is. She walks up the steps slowly, keeping her eyes on the ground, trying to avoid all the staring. Absolutely _everyone_ is staring at her. Finally, she looks up at her friends, looking right over me. I guess I kind of blend in with the background right now. There's a _lot_ of leather right here.

"H-hey, guys..." Faith says with a weak smile.

"Hey Faith, what's up?" Jack asks. The Leathers all agreed before she showed up to act like it's just a regular day, and I can see that she appreciates it, because she relaxes a bit and smiles.

"Not much, Jack. Where's Buff-..." She freezes as she notices me, the only girl in the sea of leather-clad biker males.

"Hey, girfriend." I say with a smile.

"Um, Faith?" Jason says nervously.

"Huh?" Faith mutters under her breath, still staring at me in awe.

"Um, you've got a little... something... just there." He teases, pointing at the corner of his mouth, and the guys laugh. Faith barely even notices. Though, as I look, I see Jason's right, andshe actually _is_ drooling a little.

"Faith?" I say. As amusing as this is, I have to take some pity on her. Show her _some_ mercy.

"Yeah, B?" She snaps herself out of her stupor, and I point to the corner of my mouth. She blushes and wipes the drool away on her sleeve, and another round of laughter escapes the mouts of the guys. "Shut up, dirtbags." Faith grumbles humorously. The guys fall silent, but their eyes are still laughing.

"Good morning, sunshine." I tease her, and she walks up to me, smiling. She puts her arms around my waist and pulls me in for a kiss that quickly becomes heated.

"Ugh. This again? First day back, and the dykes have to go and dry hump each other on the front steps of the school." Cordelia groans. Her "friends" all murmur their agreement.

Without missing a beat, Faith removes one of her arms from around my waist, putting it behind her. Never pulling away from the kiss, Faith flips Cordy and the rest of the Skank Squad off. I smile against her lips.

"What's the matter, Lehane?" Cordy smirks. "No snappy comeback?"

Finally, Faith pulls away, breathing harshly. "Nah, just got better things to do than exchange words with ya, Cordy." She says, then goes back to kissing me.

Cordelia sighs, realizing she's not going to get a rise out of Faith that way.

Unfortunately, she changes tactics. "Well, I guess I shouldn't be surprized. You always were the school slut. I guess I just figured after a couple days ago, you'd have had enough sex to last you more than two days. It was rough enough to land you in the hospital."

Everyone, even Cordelia's friends stiffen up. This just went from a not-so-friendly competition to personal. Faith freezes against me, and I tighten my arms around her. Not to stop her from going off, but to stop _me_ from going off. Faith seems to realize that, so she holds me tighter as well and whispers in my ear.

"Don't do it, B. She's not worth it." I nod, feeling tears rolling down her cheeks against my cheeks, and I want nothing more than to haul off and knock Cordelia on her ass. But Faith is begging me now not to rise to the occasion, so I just let it go.

"So tell me, Faith, how was he? Was he good?"

I can feel Faith shutting down, so I squeeze her, pleading with her to not close me out. She nods in understanding, and I back away from her to look Cordelia in the eye. Faith squeezes my arm, and I nod, assuring her that I'm not going to hit the bitch.

"Cordelia, I used to be in your shoes. The popular girl in school. Future Homecoming Queen. Future Prom Queen. And I was just as self-centered as you are. So I know what's _really_ going through your mind. You want to try and hurt anyone that the guys might be drooling over more than they're drooling over you. You want to be the only one that draws the guys' attention. And now that I'm here, and dating the girl that's hotter than you here at this school, I'm drawing attention away from you, so you have to lash out. Well, here's a newsflash for you, the world doesn't revolve around you. You're _not_ the hottest girl in school. I'm not sure which one of you was here first, but Faith is ten times hotter than you, and that makes you jealous. And I'll bet that, now that Willow's coming out of her shell, and drawing the attention of boys galore, you're even jealous of her, and that _really_ gets your hair in a twist. So you just lash out all you want. It's not going to work." With that, I turn back around and kiss Faith even more passionately than before. The guys are all trying hard not to laugh at Cordelia's rage as she stomps away, the Skank Squad trailing close behind her.

"Faith?" I whisper to her once Cordelia is out of sight.

"Yeah?" She asks, wiping tears away.

I want to ask if she's okay, but I know that that's a stupid question.

So instead, I just kiss her again.

After a minute, I pull away so I can speak. "You don't have to say it yet, but I'm ready to. So I'm going to say it. I love you, Faith." Faith gasps in surprize, and the guys' eyes grow wide.

**So, a really short chapter this time, mainly as a teaser. So, how do you think Faith is going to react? Bring on the reviews!**


	8. Chapter 8

I'm... What?

(Buffy's POV)

_"Faith?" I whisper to her once Cordelia is out of sight._

_ "Yeah?" She asks, wiping tears away._

_ I want to ask if she's okay, but I know that that's a stupid question. _

_ So instead, I just kiss her again._

_ After a minute, I pull away so I can speak. "You don't have to say it yet, but I'm ready to. So I'm going to say it. I love you, Faith." Faith gasps in surprize, and the guys' eyes grow wide._

...

"Faith?" I ask. Everyone's eyes are darting back and forth between me and Faith, their mouths open wide in shock. "Faith?" I ask again, growing more and more nervous with each second of silence.

"I... um... I-I-I... I mean... uh..." Faith stammers, and she's tensing up.

"Okay, you're wigging out." I mutter, backing away, hurt.

"B..." Faith tries to stop me, but I shrug out of her grasp.

"I'm sorry." I say. "I shouldn't have said that." I turn and run away, and Faith doesn't come after me.

"Buffy?" Willow asks as I dart by her. She and Xander exchange a look and stand up, running after me.

...

"Buffy? You okay?" Will asks me as she slowly walks into the bathroom behind me. Xander stayed outside, of course.

"I will be." I say coldly.

"What's wrong?"

I wipe my eyes with the sleeve of Faith's jacket and blow my nose. (On a paper towel, not the jacket!)

"Um... Cordelia... she showed up and... She started poking fun at Faith and me... You know, 'cause we're together... and at first... it didn't really matter. Faith flipped her off, and we just went back to kissing. But then..."

"Oh my god. Tell me Cordelia did _not_ bring up Faith's attack."

I nod. Willow doesn't know what _really_ happened with Faith, but she does know something _bad_ happened.

"Buffy... can I ask you something? It's about Faith."

I nod in confusion.

"Well, actually, it's more about her attack... Are the rumors true?"

"Which ones?" I ask bitterly.

"That... you know.. Faith was..." Willow leans in close to whisper to me, like we were in a crowded room and she didn't want anyone overhearing, "r-a-p-e-d?" She spells out the word "raped".

I look at her with tears in my eyes. "Yeah... It's true."

Willow's eyes are on fire now. Wait, no, that's not how the phrase goes, is it? Fuck, I can barely even think right now. Um... I meant, flames are dancing in Willow's eyes. That sounds right.

"Do you know who did it?" Willow growls.

"No. No clue. Well... the police don't have a clue. But I have my suspicions."

"Who do you think?"

"I... um... I can't tell you."

"Why not?"

"Because then I'd have to tell you _why_ I think it was him, and that's not really _my_ story to tell."

"Well, I won't ask why. Who do you think it was? Promise I won't tell anyone."

I sigh, looking under the bathroom stalls to see if anyone was in any of them. Finally, I get back up and look Willow in the eyes. "Fine. But you can't tell _anyone_. Not even Xander."

"My lips are sealed."

I sigh again. "I think it was Mayor Wilkins."

And the look that crosses Willow's face is one of many different mixed emotions. The two prominent ones being frustration and confusion.

"What?"

"Yeah."

"Okay, Buffy, fine. Don't tell me."

"No! Will, I'm serious." I say, looking her dead in the eyes, hoping she could pick up on my sincerity.

She narrows her eyes, but eventually seems to believe that I'm not just trying to avoid the question.

"Alright. So why do you think it's- Wait, no, sorry. Forgot I promised not to ask that."

"It's okay."

"So... why'd you run in here?"

"I... I, um... I told Faith I love her, and..."

"She wigged?"

I nod, tears forming in my eyes again.

"Oh, Buffy, I'm sorry." She wraps her arms around me and holds me tight. I don't know why I'm reacting this way. I already knew that I'd be ready to say it long before Faith was, and that when I finally did say it, that she'd probably freak out. This is nothing I didn't expect. But it still hurts.

The bell rings, announcing the start of the day, so I splash water on my face to cool down, then dry my eyes on a paper towel, and Willow and I meet up with Xander and head off to class.

...

The first half of the day runs kind of smoothly. Faith avoids me, and I avoid her. When we're in the same class, we sit in different seats than we usually do. Normally, we sit right beside each other, and more often than not, her right hand somehow finds its way to rest on my left thigh. She's left handed, so she can get away with that while still taking notes in class. Which she never did in the first place, but still, nothing seemed out of the ordinary.

But today, we're constantly avoiding any contact or close proximity to each other. Faith sits in one of the back corners of the room, and I sit on the opposite corner in the front of the room. But I can feel her eyes on me the whole time.

Then comes lunch. I see Faith sitting down at our usual table, with her friends as well as Xander and Willow sitting around her. There's one empty seat left, right beside her. I get my lunch and start to head over to the table, but then I think better of it, so I turn and walk to a different table, three down from the usual table. I can feel everyone's eyes on me now. And when I say everyone, I mean _everyone_. Not just Will, Xander, Faith, and Faith's leather-clad friends. The _entire lunchroom_ is staring. The downside of being the only lesbian couple at school, we're kind of celebrities here. Everyone knows about us. So I'm not surprized when Mark Hartman walks up and sits down next to me.

"Hey, there, Summers." He says, flashing a grin my way.

"Hey, there, asswipe." I say, mimicking his tone.

He just grins, though. "That's funny. Listen, the Homecoming Dance is coming up soon, so I was thinking I'll pick you up at seven that night."

I sigh. "You just don't _get_ it, do you?"

His smile falters slightly, but it comes back even wider. "Get what, babe?"

"First of all, I'm _not_ your _babe_! Second of all, I'm with _Faith_! And even if I wasn't, I'm still a _lesbian_. That means no guys. What. So. Ever. Translation: No way, José. Sayonara. See you later. Better luck next time."

"Okay. So. Wear something red the night of Homecoming, it'll go better with the red tie I'm gonna wear, plus it really makes my eyes pop." He grins again, certain that I'm just playing hard to get.

"Dude, seriously? Just back off, and I won't hurt your manhood."

"Sure thing, babe. I'll talk to ya later, okay?" He leans in to kiss me, but is suddenly stopped by a strong grip on his shoulder that makes his eyes water.

"Hey, she said back off, asshole." I look up and see Faith glaring down at him, rage in her eyes. From the look on Willow, Xander, and Faith's gang's faces, they're just as surprized at Faith's speed as I am.

Mark brushes Faith's hand off and stands up.

"She's just playing hard to get. Obviously, you're not satisfying her enough, so I'm gonna take it upon myself to-" There was only five hits. Faith's fist hit his face. His face hit the table beside us. He fell down and hit the floor. Then he bounced and hit the floor again. Finally, there was the metaphorical pin hitting the floor showing how quiet it is in the room.

Faith's eyes are wild, but she's holding herself back right now. She takes a deep breath and looks at me.

"You alright?" She asks after a minute.

"Yeah. I'm fine." I say. She nods and starts to walk back to her table, but I stop her, turning her around to face me.

I don't say a word as I pull her in for a kiss. Her arms automatically wrap around my waist, holding me close, so I wrap my arms around her neck and arch my back into the kiss. Our tongues meet and embrace. I can feel my mouth vibrate against hers as I moan.

Finally, we separate, and Faith's grin is a mile wide. I catch my breath, then grin back at her. She puts her arm around my shoulders and leads me back to our table. I totally forget about my lunch as I follow her back and sit down beside her.

Everyone goes on talking like nothing happened, which I'm thankful for.

"Hey, Buff, wasn't that the dirtbag you KO'd a while back in gym?" Jason asks, and everyone smirks around me.

"Yeah. That's the one."

"You want him to back off, you've got to stop dropping subtle hints like knockin' him on his ass. You've got to go for the bolder gestures. You know, something that says "back off, or I'll rip your testicles off and use them as lucky dice on my rear-view mirror." Something that'll discourage him a little more than breaking his nose repeatedly." Faith explains, and the guys at the table shift in their seats uncomfortably, scooting slightly away from Faith.

I smirk at the newfound tension at the table.

"Fuck, Faith. You know, you may look all feminine and whatnot, but you're a scary bitch, ya know?" Jack says, and Faith glares at him. He whimpers.

"Try that again." Faith says. "I thought we were all in agreement that that word would not be used to describe me."

"Fuck, sorry, Faith. Just slipped out, that's all. You're not feminine, okay? You're a total macho tough-girl... I... I didn't mean anything by it. But you _are_ a scary bitch."

"Damn right I am." She grins, and I roll my eyes at her. "What?" She asks me.

"I didn't say anything." I reply.

"What?"

"Nothing! I didn't say anything!" I laugh.

"But what's with the eye-roll, B?"

"You really want me to say it out loud?" I tease. Faith flushes slightly, obviously figuring out what I'm talking about, and I laugh. "I didn't think so."

"Okay, am I correct in assuming that, since Faith isn't bragging about it, it's not some kind of sexual innuendo?" Jason asks.

"Correct. No sexual innuendos here." I confirm.

"Well, hell, now you've _got_ to tell us!"

I look at Faith, who glares at Jason.

"No, no telling of any kind will be done." She growls, but Jason isn't backing down.

"Oh come on, "B"! Give us the dish on our dear Faith!"

"No! No dishing!" Faith growls again.

I just watch their interactions with a smile as everyone else looks back and forth in confusion.

"Come on, Buffy!" Jason says, grinning.

"Okay, well-" I'm stopped by Faith's hand covering my mouth.

"B, don't you dare!" She mutters under her breath. "Come on, I got my rep to protect!" She whispers in my ear. "I'll do whatever you want, just don't say anything, please."

I pull away and grin evilly.

"Come on, Faith, how often do I get to embarrass you like this?"

"Buffy, please!" She all but whines.

I turn back to the group and smile. Faith buries her face in her arms on the table and groans.

"Well, I'm not going to say anything more than this, but let's just say, Faith's whole tough-girl façade? It's less "tough girl" and more "closet romantic"."

"Wait, closet romantic? Faith?" Everyone starts laughing at the table, but the laughter fades when they see how serious I am. "Okay, what exactly are you talking about? We're gonna need more details than that." Jack says, and Faith looks helplessly at me.

"B, you've had you're fun. Please, for the love of god, drop it."

"What am I gonna tell them, Faith?" I tease. "That you cry at the end of Titanic? That you like to have picnics under the stars?"

"B, please, just shut up!" She whimpers as the guys all stare at her in surprize and the obvious teasing soon to come.

"Faith, there is nothing wrong with being romantic." I tease, poking her in the ribs. She flinches away, resigned to her fate.

"Alright. Come on, guys. Let it out. Just let it out now so I can get on to the kicking your asses part of this discussion." She says to Jason and the others.

"Very well, Juliet." Jack teases. "Or, wait, would you be the Romeo of this story?"

"Definitely Romeo." Jason agrees. "It's the masculinity."

"Okay, there is nothing wrong with Romeo and Juliet, okay?" Faith says, stunning everyone to silence. "You know, for a supposed "romantic" story, it's extremely violent and bloody, and the two main characters both end up _killing_ themselves in the end. Of course, if any of you assholes had ever even bothered to read it instead of mockin' those who did, you'd have known that."

Then, Faith does something that none of us would ever have expected in our wildest dreams. And I've had some wild dreams. (Mind out of the gutters now, perverts.)

She actually stands up, looks down at me and smiles as she _quotes_ Romeo and Juliet. Out loud.

"'Tis but thy name that is my enemy. Thou art thyself, though not a Montague. What's Montague? It is nor hand, nor foot, nor arm, nor face, nor any other part belonging to a man. O, be some other name! What's in a name? That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet. So Romeo would, were he not Romeo call'd, retain that dear perfection which he owes without that title. Romeo, doff thy name, and for that name which is no part of thee take all myself."

Everyone in the lunchroom, including the teachers, once again stares at Faith, open-mouthed. After a couple minutes of silence, everyone starts cheering, and she takes a big, dramatic bow.

"Okay, um... I'm sorry, but I don't think it's possible to tease her after that." I say. And Jason and the guys nod in agreement.

"But, um, Faith, I thought you were the Romeo here?" Willow says, and we all turn to her in confusion.

"What?" Faith asks.

"I thought you were the Romeo out of you and Buffy. You were just quoting Juliet, not Romeo." Then, everyone turns back to Faith and smirks as she sits back down, scowling

"I guess I was wrong. Looks like we _can_ still tease her after that." I say, and she shoots a glare at me. "But, let's just lay off her now." Ilook around meaningfully to everyone else, and they all nod in agreement again.

"Whatever, I just can't wait for gym. I hope we're playin' dodgeball again." Faith grumbles, and I smile as I kiss her cheek.

...

We _did_ play dodgeball again in gym today. Faith is one of the team captains, and, of course, Mark is the other.

And Mark chooses first.

"Summers." He grins at me, and Faith glares at him.

"Dude, stay the hell away from my girlfriend unless you want to repeat the events of lunch earlier." She says, but he doesn't back down. Luckily, Dawn steps up, and I shoot her a look that I hope conveys how grateful I am to her. She nods, showing that she understands. Ever since she caught wind of what he said about Faith a while back, before I beat the shit out of him, she's decided she despises him just as much as I do, and we've actually grown a bit closer, so I really am grateful that she took this bullet for me.

Mark scowls at her before he speaks. "No, I meant the other Summers. Buffy."

"Sorry, Mark. Shoulda specified." Faith grins. She and Dawn actually get along now, too. "Buffy, get your blonde ass up here." She grins at me in a way that I can't be mad at her for that comment. I go to stand by my girlfriend, and for good measure, I pull her in for a searing kiss.

The whistle blows before it can go on for long, and we both turn to the coach.

"Look here, now, girls, I got nothing against this whole lesbian thing, but don't let it into _my_ gymnasium! This ain't a place for making out, this is a place for getting the tar beat out of you, to toughen you up for the big, bad world! Hartman, choose your next player, and get on with it!"

And so Faith and Mark go back and forth picking players. We end up with Willow and Xander on our team, because Faith picked them right after she picked me, but she completely avoided any of her leather jacket-wearing friends.

_Uh-oh. Looks like Faith's about to get back at them for lunch._ I think humorously to myself.

Finally, the teams are chosen, and I shoot a look at Faith, smiling as we get ready to begin.

However, I have a bad feeling about this game as Mark shoots looks at his friends, and they all nod in understanding.

The coach blows his whistle, and as usual, the gym descends into madness. Faith and I take out a couple of people immediately.

After about five minutes, the herd's been thinned a bit on both sides. Willow and Xander are still in it, as is Faith, Mark, Jason, Jack, and, of course, me. The rest of the Leathers are out, as are most of the other people whose names I don't even know. There are about seven people left on each team. Then, three more members of our team drop, leaving Willow, Xander, me, and Faith. Jack and Jason go down, too, leaving Mark and four of his friends still standing.

I throw my ball and almost get one of them out, but he dodges. All five of them throw their balls at Faith right then, and pick up new balls, throwing them at Faith as well.

The first volley of balls hit Faith dead on, but they kept picking up balls and throwing them. Faith is on the ground now, curling up in the fetal position, but they keep throwing balls at her.

"Cut it out!" I scream at them. "She's out already! Stop it!" I run over and push Mark down on the ground. His friends all turn to me and take me out as well, so I walk back to Faith and help her up, and we start to walk away, but I turn back to Mark. "What the hell is your problem?!" I shout at him.

"His problem is that you keep rejectin' him. Hurts his manhood. Damages his reputation as the guy who can get any girl he wants." Faith says. "Only one other girl has rejected him before and never gave in."

"Yeah? Well that's just tough shit. Get it through your skull, _Mark_. You and me? _Never. Gonna. Happen_. Got it? N-E-V-E-R, never! I am a _lesbian_! Get it? G-A-Y, gay! That's me! And I have a G-I-R-L-F-R-I-E-N-D! Girlfriend!" With that, I turn around and walk away with Faith. In the commotion, Willow and Xander had each picked up two balls, and now throw them Mark's friends, getting them all out at once. The last guy looks at Xander and Willow as they separate, moving to opposite sides of the court.

Mark picks up a ball and Will and Xander do the same. I can see his thoughts clearly. He thinks if he can get Xander out, get the guy out, then the girl, Willow, wouldn't pose much of a threat, so he could get her out easily.

It doesn't work that way, though. He throws his ball at Xander, and Xander dodges, then he and Willow throw their balls simultaneously and both connect. But they don't stop there. They give him a taste of his own medicine, and they keep picking up balls and launching them faster than I thought they could. But they shouldn't have done that, because now Mark is ignoring the constant whistling coming from the coach, telling him he's out, and Mark picks up another ball and throws it at Xander, hard. The ball connects with Xander's gut, and Xander doubles over, coughing, then he does the same to Willow, catching her in the head.

He only hit each of them once, but he was throwing to kill. (Metaphorically speaking, of course.)

"That's it! Game over!" The coach yells. "Hartman! Principal! Now!"

Mark glares at the coach, then smirks and mutters "whatever" under his breath and walks out of the gym.

"Damn. Someone needs to knock him down to size." I say, looking at Faith, who looks pale. "Faith? What is it, baby?"

"That... That smirk... I recognize that smirk..." She says, still staring at Mark as he swings the doors to the gymnasium shut.


	9. Chapter 9

I'm... What?

(Buffy's POV)

_Mark picks up a ball and Will and Xander do the same. I can see his thoughts clearly. He thinks if he can get Xander out, get the guy out, then the girl, Willow, wouldn't pose much of a threat, so he could get her out easily._

_ It doesn't work that way, though. He throws his ball at Xander, and Xander dodges, then he and Willow throw their balls simultaneously and both connect. But they don't stop there. They give him a taste of his own medicine, and they keep picking up balls and launching them faster than I thought they could. But they shouldn't have done that, because now Mark is ignoring the constant whistling coming from the coach, telling him he's out, and Mark picks up another ball and throws it at Xander, hard. The ball connects with Xander's gut, and Xander doubles over, coughing, then he does the same to Willow, catching her in the head. _

_ He only hit each of them once, but he was throwing to kill. (Metaphorically speaking, of course.)_

_ "That's it! Game over!" The coach yells. "Hartman! Principal! Now!"_

_ Mark glares at the coach, then smirks and mutters "whatever" under his breath and walks out of the gym._

_ "Damn. Someone needs to knock him down to size." I say, looking at Faith, who looks pale. "Faith? What is it, baby?"_

_ "That... That smirk... I recognize that smirk..." She says, still staring at Mark as he swings the doors to the gymnasium shut._

...

"What do you mean, you recognize the smirk?" I ask, worried.

"I... it... but..." She stammers.

Faith looks back at me, right into my eyes, so I know something's up. I see nothing but fear and rage in her eyes. "I... I'm sorry..."

"Sorry? Sorry for what?" I ask.

"For this..." Faith says as she turns and runs out of the gymnasium.

"Faith!" I call after her, but she doesn't even acknowledge that she heard me.

"What was that about?" Willow asks when she and Xander walk up to me.

"I... I don't know... I'll be back..." I say, then I go after Faith.

...

"Faith!" I call just as I'm catching up to her. I put my hand on her shoulder, and she wheels around and punches me in the eye. I go down, and the next thing I know, she's on the ground beside me.

"Oh shit! Buffy! I'm so sorry!" She says, pulling me towards her and hugging me. "Fuck! You scared me, Buffy!"

"What's going on?" I ask her, holding my right eye.

"Damn, I'm so sorry, Buffy! I didn't mean to hit you!"

"Faith!" I say loudly, getting her attention. I stand up and take her hands in mine. My eye is already swelling shut. "What is going on? What was that about?" I ask, nodding back towards the gym.

Faith sighs, then slumps back to the ground against the lockers.

"It... It was that smirk... I've seen that same smirk before."

"Well, how long have you been going to school with Mark?"

"It's not that. I mean, yeah, it is... I just never paid any attention to it before. Mark was never really on my radar, other than in athletics and stuff."

"Then what is it?"

"It... That smirk... it's the same as the smirk... my rapist gave me."

"What?" I whisper, kneeling down beside her as she buries her face in her hands.

"I... I don't really remember much... What I do remember is just what I've seen in my... in my nightmares... But that smirk... I recognize it... It's the smirk the guy that raped me gave just before... just before he did it... Just before he knocked me out."

"Oh god..." I say softly, then sit down next to Faith. I put my hands in my lap. "Do... Do you think that... that Mark...?"

"I don't know... I don't want to believe it... I don't want it to be him... not 'cause he's a really great guy, and I look up to him or anythin', 'cause, hello, he's a major dirtbag... but because... his dad's on the city council... No one'll ever believe that he raped me, and even if they do, his dad'll just pay off whoever would take my side, and it would never even make it to court. Even if it did, Mr. Hartman would only pay off the jury, and there'd never be any conviction. If anythin', I'd probably be convicted of tryin' to blackmail a city councilman."

"Faith, you've got to have hope. We're going to figure out who did this to you, and we're going to get justice."

Faith nods, but I don't think she really believes me. But I don't mention anything more, I just pull her into me and wrap my arms around her.

Just then, Faith's cellphone rings. She slowly and hesitantly pulls it out of her pocket and looks at the Caller ID.

She narrows her eyes in confusion, and I read the Caller ID off of her phone. It's her stepmom, Linda.

She looks at me, and I look back.

"Wonder what this is about." Faith says, then flips her phone open to answer. "Hey. What's up?"

Her brow furrows even more as Linda responds.

"Yeah? Fine. Okay. What's goin' on? Okay, yeah, I got that, but what's this about?"

Faith continues to ask questions like that, but Linda never actually answers the question.

"Fine. Yeah. Fine, got it. Yeah, thanks for nothin'. Look, fine, I'll be there. Should I wait 'til after school? Yeah? Okay. Will do." She glances over at me and shrugs. "Look, can B come with? Yeah, Buffy. Oh come on! Why not?! She's been here for me the whole time! What the hell?!"

She stands up angrily and glares back down at me. I mouth "What's going on?", but she just shakes her head.

"Come on, Linda! This is bullshit! She deserves to know whatever is goin' on! She's been here for me the whole time, and never judged!" She scowls, defeated, and my heart sinks. I hate seeing her like that. "Fine. Yeah, I'll come alone. Yeah. Yeah. Okay, fine, whatever. I'll be there after school. Yeah. Bye." She slams her phone closed angrily then shoves it back in her pocket.

"What was that all about?" I ask, standing up and holding her hand.

She sighs. "Linda called. Said the test results are back at the hospital. She sounded kinda worried. She and Carrie already know what the results are, but they don't want me to find out over the phone. So, I'm s'posed to meet up with them at the hospital today after school. They don't want you to come with, though. Said this is a family matter, not for outsiders right now. Said that, when I find out, if I still want you to know, then I can call and let ya know. So I guess we'll just have to wait 'til later to find out what the fuck's goin' on."

"Well, whatever it is, we'll get through it. Just promise me one thing, okay?"

"Sure. Whatever. What is it?"

"Whatever you find out... don't try to hide it from me. Please, I want to know. And whatever it is, we'll figure out what to do together, right?"

She smiles reassuringly. "Yeah, you got it, B. No hidin'. That's a promise." I smile back and pull her in for a kiss to end all kisses.

We let everything we're feeling at that moment leak into the kiss. Every ounce of doubt about the future. Every single optimistic or pessimistic thought. Our anger, fear, confidence, and love fuels the kiss. It's the way we always kiss. We never hide anything in our kisses, we always let everything we feel show itself in the way we kiss.

Just from the way her lips move against mine, and the way her arms are wrapped loosely around my waist, I can tell she's glad I'm here beside her, and that I don't seem to be willing to let her go through any of this by herself, but at the same time, I can feel her fear and uncertainty about everything. It scares me, but I know that right now, I have to be the strong one for her.

The kiss ends only once the bell rings, so we go back to the gym and put our regular clothes on, then head off to our next classes. We have to separate, though, because we don't have the same class next.

...

After school, we meet up on the front lawn. She calls and tells Linda that she's going to walk me home before going to the hospital, and I smile at the gesture.

"Yeah, okay. Bye." She says as she hangs up. "I asked again if I could bring you along, but she said no." She growls. I squeeze her hand reassuringly. "It's just... I don't know... I don't wanna be that clingy girlfriend chick that can't do anythin' without the other person, but... I'd just... I just don't feel as confident about, well, anythin', when you're not beside me. I feel stronger when you're there. But when you're not... I'm just scared. And I hate that, but... no matter how hard I try, I just can't fuckin' get over it."

I squeeze her hand even harder, trying to assure her that everything will be alright, but she just nods slightly, then starts walking, keeping hold of my hand.

"Let's get you home. I gotta get to the hospital soon."

"Yeah." I agree, keeping pace with her.

...

It's been three hours since Faith called to let me know she'd gotten to the hospital alright, and that she was about to get whatever news the doctor had for her. With any luck, the DNA tests came back, and we'll know who did it. We'll know who _raped_ my girlfriend, and then we can put him behind bars for good.

Of course, even if they came back, and they couldn't figure out who it was, I'm sure there are other ways the police could find out who did that to Faith. I just hope the DNA tests _did_ say who did it. Then we could hurry up and move on.

I check my phone for the thousandth time, and, no, that is _not_ an exaggeration. I've actually been counting. Got to keep my mind occupied somehow, right?

There are no new messages or missed calls. I'm beyond worried, I'm downright terrified right now. What if the tests weren't DNA tests after all? What if the results were coming back to tell Faith she had some big, bad STD because of this?!

Finally, I decide to try my luck. I hit and hold the call button on my phone. Faith was the last person I called, so it would dial her number exactly.

I wait for the phone to ring three times, then hear the _click_ that says Faith picked up, and I sigh in relief.

_"This is Danny's Pizzeria. How may I help you?"_ A teenage boy's voice asks, and I groan. I forgot that my mom just had me order a pizza for us earlier tonight.

"Sorry. Wrong number." I sigh, then hang up. I hit "3" on my phone and hold it. I should have just speed dialed her in the first place.

Just as before, the phone rang three times, but this time, it went through to voicemail.

_"Hey, this is Faith. You know the drill."_ Her voicemail greeting sighed, and I groaned.

_ Could Faith be avoiding me? Was the news really that bad? OH MY GOD! What if she really DOES have an STD?!_

"Faith... Um... look, I get that you probably need to be alone. 'Cause... whatever they told you... it's probably pretty big, right? So... just call me whenever you feel like it, okay? Don't feel pressured to call me back right away. Just... Just know that I'm here... whenever you need to talk... And... I meant what I said earlier. I... I love you, Faith." With that, I hang up, then throw my phone across the room, glad that it doesn't break against the wall. I slump down on the couch, then bury my face in my hands.

"That's a dangerous thing to be saying at your age, Buffy." I jump when I hear my mom's voice suddenly.

"Mom! What?" I ask, catching my breath.

"I love you. It's a dangerous thing to be saying at... well, it's dangerous no matter what age you are, but especially at your age. You need to be certain about them before you say them."

"Mom, I-" I sigh, knowing already that I'm about to be scolded for saying it already, but my mom surprises me when she cuts me off.

"Don't worry, Buffy. This isn't going to be a lecture about how you need to be more responsible with what you say. As a matter of fact... This is more geared towards the elusive "I'm proud of you" conversations." She smiles. I stare in shock.

"Wh... What?"

"I mean it, Buffy. I'm proud of you. Everything you've done so far when it comes to Faith has been really mature. Even when she told that horrible story about... what happened to her when she was younger. Even after all that's happened since you two met, you've still stuck by her. Most girls or guys your age would have freaked and abandoned the other person long before now, but you don't even show the slightest sign of wavering in your determination to help her. And I can see the truth of those three words in your eyes every time someone even talks about Faith, forget about when she's actually in the same _room_ as you. I can see how much you really do love Faith. So, I'm proud of you for not being too afraid to say it."

I still stare at my mom in shock, my mouth open. I'm not proud of it, but I know that, right now, I look like one of those drooling zombies in the movies.

"Buffy, do you want me to drive you over to Faith's house right now? I know you must be worried."

I finally close my mouth then think for a minute. I _really_ want to go over there right now and check on Faith. I just know that she's freaking out right now.

But then I think back to what I told Faith in my message, and I know I have my answer.

"Yes. I want that. But it's probably better if I don't. I... I told Faith I'd give her some time to think, and that she could call me whenever she was feeling up to it. So... I'll just wait until she decides to tell me what's going on."

Mom nods. "That's a good idea. So long as it's a _healthy_ length of time waiting. If it goes on too long, though-"

"I know. I won't push, but I'm going to let her know I don't want her pushing me away, either."


	10. Chapter 10

I'm... What?

(Buffy's POV)

_I finally close my mouth then think for a minute. I really want to go over there right now and check on Faith. I just know that she's freaking out right now._

_ But then I think back to what I told Faith in my message, and I know I have my answer._

_ "Yes. I want that. But it's probably better if I don't. I... I told Faith I'd give her some time to think, and that she could call me whenever she was feeling up to it. So... I'll just wait until she decides to tell me what's going on."_

_ Mom nods. "That's a good idea. So long as it's a healthy length of time waiting. If it goes on too long, though-"_

_ "I know. I won't push, but I'm going to let her know I don't want her pushing me away, either."_

...

The next day, at school, I look everywhere for Faith, but I never see her. Finally, I asked Jason about her, but he just shrugged.

"Heard she's sick or somethin'." He says, then gets a look on her face.

"What?" I ask.

He sighs. It's just him and me right now, the rest of Faith's friends are in the principal's office for something or other. The only reason Jason isn't with them is because he was serving detention when whatever they're in trouble for happened, so he's got a witness saying it wasn't him. Unfortunately, since Willow and Xander have been hanging out with them a lot, they also got in trouble for it.

"What?" I ask again.

"Buffy, can I ask ya somethin'?"

"Of course."

"Will ya _answer _the question?"

"I need to know what the question is before I can answer it."

He nods. "What _really _happened to Faith? I mean, I know it wasn't just a mugging or anythin' like that. Anyone who knows her, which is pretty much the whole damn town, knows she doesn't have nothin' worth stealin'. Especially money. And I know Faith told you what happened. And even if she didn't, then you still _know_ what happened. So come on... She's my friend, Buffy."

I want to tell him. He's right, he _is_ Faith's friend, and Faith really needs her friends right now. But it's not my place to tell him. So, I tell him that.

"Look, it's not my place to tell you anything... Don't take it the wrong way, I do think you deserve to know, because you're a pretty cool guy and one of Faith's best friends, but really... if Faith told me to tell you, I'd gladly tell you everything I know, which still isn't much, but... It's just not my place to say anything. I'm sorry. I really am."

Jason nods angrily, but he understands.

"It's just... Faith and me, we've been friends since before middle school, you know? Told each other everything. And I mean _everything_. I know things about her, and she knows things about me that we really wish we _didn't_ know about each other. Been there for each other through thickest and thinnest, through Hell and high water, and all that. But she's tight-lipped about whatever's goin' on right now, and it just _sucks_! I wanna know who the hell I need to beat up!"

"You and me both, Jason." I mutter under my breath.

He hears that, and smirks. "You know... I didn't get it at first."

"What?"

"Why Faith's so into you. I mean, she's never really been into anyone before. Slept around a lot, I'm sure you know."

"Yeah. I know."

"But you're different to her. She really likes you. I mean, used to be, whenever it was just me, Faith and the guys, we'd talk about bikes and action movies and who could win in a fight: Chuck Norris or Steven Segal. Then, Faith would make a comment about how she could take both of 'em or somethin'. But now, whenever it's just me, Faith and the guys, yeah, we talk about stuff like that still, but now any time we talk about... well, anything, really, she just goes on and on about you and how she wonders what you'd think of that. I never really got why. I never understood why she's so into you before. But I think I do now. You're tough. I never saw that before 'cause of the whole "sun dress and sandals" thing you had goin' on. I thought you were just another of those prissy girly-girls that Faith likes to work up and get under the sheets, then leave, but I never said anything because she swore up and down that she actually liked you, and that she wasn't gonna be that girl with you. And frankly, we joke around a lot about it, but she scares the shit outta me. But now I think I finally see it. You really are tough, and I don't think I've ever seen a girl more suited for Faith than you are, Buffy, despite the sun dress and sandals." I smile in appreciation, and I swear, I think we're having a moment. Then, in true Jason fashion, he ruins it. "I mean, other than Angelina Jolie, of course."

"Please... I could totally take Angelina Jolie."

"No way! Angelina's a total triple threat! She's badass and she's hot!"

"That's two."

"Nah, that's three. Hot counts twice."

"Oh yeah? Then I'm a quadruple threat." I fire back. "I'm badass, I'm hot, and I'm a lesbian."

Jason inhales sharply. "Shit. Damn it, you're right. You win."

I pump my fist in victory. "Damn right I win!"

He rolls his eyes. "Look, when you see Faith, just tell her that I'm here for her, okay?"

I nod. "You got it."

...

"Faith, come on, pick up..." I mutter as I try to call her yet again.

_"Hey, this is Faith. You know the drill." _Her voicemail greeting sounds yet again.

"Hey, Faith... I know I said I'd give you some time to calm down or something, whatever you learned was probably pretty tough, right? But... please call me back. Please?" I hung up, leaving the same message I'd left a hundred times before now. Yet again.

I tossed my phone on the couch cushion beside me and slumped back down on the couch to wait. Yet again.

Thirty minutes later, I pick up the phone and dial the number that I've now called so many times just _today_ that it's permanently embedded in my mind.

"Come on, please, for the love of _god_, pick up."

_"Hey, this is Faith. You know the drill."_

I curse under my breath and don't even bother leaving the message this time. It's been three days since I talked to Faith before she headed up to the hospital. Three days, and not a peep from her. _Three days!_

I know I'm probably just being clingy or whatever, but still... you'd think that, in three days, she'd have at least called to tell me that she's alright. Unless... Unless she's _not _alright...

And now my imagination's running wild, imagining all the horrible things that could have happened to Faith. What if she got raped again?! What if she got some really bad news, then blacked out and broke her neck in the fall?! What if it was something random, like she was crossing the street and accidentally got hit by a bus?!

_No. Faith's fine. She just needs some time to process whatever the doctor told her. That's all._ I tell myself.

Finally, I dial her number again, desperate to just hear her voice.

"Pick up, pick up, pick up, pick up, pick up, pick up." I pretty much chant until the ringing stops.

_"Hey-"_ I sigh as I hang up, not eager to hear the voicemail greeting, yet again. But then, my phone rings. It's Faith.

I hurriedly pick up. "Faith!" I exclaim.

_"Hey... did you just hang up on me, B?"_

I pale. "Oh... that _was_ you? I thought it was your voicemail... I just... I didn't want to hear that again."

_"Yeah... I get it. Listen... Sorry I haven't called back or anything... I just woke up, like, ten minutes ago, and saw that I had, like, a hundred missed calls."_

"You just woke up? Like, as in, you slept _all day_?"

_"Yeah... pretty much. Had a late night last night, talkin' with the fosters about... about what's goin' on."_

"What did you find out?" And there it is. The question I've been dying to ask for three days.

_"I... I can't talk about it now, B... Can I... Can I come over?"_ I can hear Faith choking up, so I know it's bad. Really bad.

"Of course you can. You don't even have to ask." I reply. And it's the truth, because she doesn't have to ask.

_"Alright, I'll... I'll be over in about an hour, okay? Gonna get a shower, and... Can I stay the night? I just... I need to get outta here for a while..."_

"Of course." I say simply.

_"'Kay... I'm gonna get a shower, then pack a bag for the night... Then I gotta tell the fosters and... Then I'll be right over. Promise, I'll explain everything, B. Just not over the phone. I can't say it over the phone..."_

"I understand, Faith. Um... Are you going to eat over there, or do you want me to fix something?"

_"Pizza'd be great... if you don't mind?"_

"No, that's fine. I can order a mean pizza." I joke, hoping it would get at least a chuckle from her, but there's nothing. "I'll see you when you get here, Faith. I love you."

_"See you then, B..." _ Faith says hesitantly, and there's a long pause before she hangs up finally, like she wanted to say something else, but couldn't.

"Faith coming over?" I whip around to see Mom standing in the doorway, sporting a nervous look on her face.

"Um... yeah, I hope that's okay?"

"Of course. Faith is always welcome here."

"Um... apparently, she got some big news when she went to the hospital a few days ago, and she said she's going to tell me what it was, so..."

"I'll make myself scarce." She promises. "Should I go ahead and order the pizza? You might want to get a shower really quick."

"No, I'm... I'll get one later. I just wanna wait for Faith to show up."

"Okay. You want me to order the pizza?"

"Um... No, I can get it. I told Faith I'd order it, and... I don't know... I just feel like I should _do_ something for her... even if it's just ordering a pizza. And it just... it feels like... I should just order the pizza myself... You know?"

Mom nods. "No. I don't really understand, but I've never been in your position before." She grabs the phone and tosses it to me. "Here's the phone... Go ahead and order whatever you want. Here's fifty dollars for the pizza." She says, setting a fifty dollar bill on the counter. "I'm going to go out tonight, give you girls some time to talk."

I nod absently as I start to dial the number for the pizza place.

...

Faith shows up just after I'm done ordering the pizza.

"Whoa. Hey. That was quick." I say with a smile as I let her in.

"Yeah... Decided to skip the shower, after all. I just... I couldn't spend another second in that house... with everyone lookin' at me, judgin' me... Like what happened to me is my fault... You're the only one who doesn't seem to judge me at all. Everyone else... they look at me either like it's my fault, that I brought it on myself, or they look at me in pity, "Poor Faith, went and got herself attacked", and they don't even know what _really_ happened... But you... You don't seem to judge me at all."

I smile. "Of course not. Um... I just got done ordering the pizza, so it'll probably be a while before it's here, if you want to sit down and talk."

"Um... not right now... Let's wait until after we eat... I don't wanna ruin your appetite."

I flinch. "Is it... Is it really _that _bad?" I whisper, and she looks away, which tells me all I need to know. "Then, Faith... I don't _want_ to wait until after we eat. I wanna know now. Please, I don't like being kept in the dark about stuff like this. What's going on?"

Tears start flowing from her eyes like Niagra Falls, but she doesn't say anything.

"Just wait, B... Please... Just wait. I'll tell you by the end of the night, okay? Please... don't make me say it right now." She begs, voice no louder than mine is right now.

I just nod. "Okay. I won't push."

She clears her throat and wipes away the tears. "Thanks." She says simply. "Um...Where... Where should I sleep?"

"You can set your bag down in my room. I'll sleep down here, on the couch. You can have my bed tonight."

She nods, then walks upstairs. I follow right behind her, showing her to my room.

"Here it is. I know it's probably not really your style, or anything, but... It's cozy." She sets her bag down by my bed.

"Nah, it's... It's great. Bigger than I'm used to."

I nod, remembering the size of her small room back at her house.

"Um... I'm going to grab some clothes and get a shower while we're waiting for the pizza." I say, not wanting to sit in an uncomfortable silence quite yet.

She nods. "Alright. I'll just... I'll be downstairs."

"Faith..." I say as she starts to walk out the bedroom door. She turns around. "Whatever is going on... Whatever it is... We'll get through it. I'll be right here, by you, the whole way through it."

"We'll see if you still feel that way once you know what it is..." She says so softly, I can barely hear her. She starts down the hall and looks back at me with confusion in her eyes. "Um... why are you giving up your room when you've got a guest bedroom?" She asks.

I facepalm. "Because I totally forgot about that bedroom. I never go in there, so I sometimes just forget it exists. Um... If you'd prefer that, then you can sleep in there. Either way, whichever one you want."

"Um... I'll take the guest bedroom... Let you have your room." I nod in agreement as I grab some clothes from my dresser and carry them to the bathroom, grabbing a towel from the linen closet in the process.

"I'll be out in a little bit." I promise, then close the door.

I start the water in the shower, then drop my clothes to the floor. I wait for the water to heat up before stepping under the spray.

I sigh as the hot water beats down on my shoulders. It feels so good. I'm so tense with everything that's going on lately that I definitely needed this shower. I'm so content right now that I don't even hear the bathroom door open.

"Um... Buffy?" Faith's voice startles me.

"Shit!" I curse under my breath as I slip slightly, but manage to regain my balance.

"You okay, B?"

"Yeah! Yeah, I'm fine!" I shout out to her above the roaring water. "What's up? What are you doing in here?"

"Sorry... I... I just... I need to get a shower, and... I just... I need a shower, like, now... Um... Could I...?"

"Oh... Yeah... Sure..." I say, blushing. She hesitates for a minute before I finally hear her starting to slowly undress, giving me, or possibly herself, time to change our minds. Finally, I don't hear her moving around anymore, so I know she's naked now, but she hesitates again. I pull the curtain back enough that she knows it's okay to get in, so she swallows before lifting one leg over the side of the tub and stepping in.

My breath catches when I see her. I can't stop staring, no matter how much I tell myself to turn around and look away. I think I'm making her nervous, because her legs cross and her arms go up to cover her chest. She looks down, blushing.

"Hey, it's okay." I say softly, cupping her cheeks and pulling her towards me for a gentle kiss. She returns it immediately, and I have to struggle to not let it turn heated. "You're beautiful..." I say when we finally separate.

Her blush deepens and she clears her throat.

"We should... we should get showered..." She mumbles.

"Yeah..." I agree. She turns around, and winces when she reaches to grab the soap. "You okay?" I ask.

"Yeah, I just... At the hospital... when I heard what they'd learned... It was a bit much, and I... I blacked out... Apparently, I dislocated my shoulder when I fell, and now the bone is bruised. Kinda... Kinda hurts to move my arm much..."

"Oh... You... You want me to help you?"

Faith is silent for a minute before she nods slowly. I take my washcloth and soap it up, placing it gently on her skin. She flinches slightly at my touch, but then relaxes as I slowly massage her shoulder with the cloth.

After a few minutes, she's much more relaxed, and even lets out a small moan before I switch to the other shoulder, apparently, the one that's bruised, because she flinches away again at first, and whimpers slightly in anticipation of pain, but once again, she relaxes when she feels how gentle I'm trying to be. She sighs in content then, and I can't help but smile.

Finally, I think I've got her shoulders done, so I start rubbing the cloth up and down her back, and I notice finally that her right shoulder does look a bit swollen compared to her left.

I must have hit a sensitive spot on her back because she whimpers again and arches away from the touch.

"I'm sorry." I apologize.

"Don't worry about it." She whispers. "That spot's always been a little tender, it all." I nod, though she can't see me, and I finish up with her back. I start to move around to her stomach, but I hesitate. I don't know if that would be a bit much for her. I don't want to move too fast, and though we're not actually really doing anything, I'm just helping her because her arm hurts, that might be going a bit too far.

But she doesn't stop me, she just waits, so I continue around her abdomen to start washing her stomach. She steps backward a bit to give me a better angle for it, but doing so ends up with my front pressing into her back, and I have to bite back a groan when I feel her against me. Faith, on the other hand, doesn't stifle her moan, and she rests her head on my shoulder, sighing in appreciation.

I eventually realise that I've been doing the same circle on her stomach for about five minutes, but Faith doesn't seem to notice. I start making bigger circles on her skin, making it slightly larger every so often, until finally, the cloth just barely grazes the underside of her breasts, and I freeze as she shifts slightly. She sighs yet again, but it's different from the contented sighs she's given so far. This sigh was almost begging for more.

I add a little more pressure to the cloth as I come back around to her breasts again, mainly just to test my theory, and sure enough, she lets out a moan, arching into the touch. The movement was so sudden that I didn't expect it, and the cloth slipped from where it rested just below her chest, and slipped up to her right breast, brushing over her nipple.

She gasps and her hands fly back to grab my hips.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have-" I start, but she interrupts me with a quiet chuckle.

"It's okay, B. Woulda stopped you if I didn't like it." She points out. "Though, if you're uncomfortable with it, then you should probably stop. It's... It's gettin' really hard to stop myself."

"Stop yourself from what?" I whisper.

"From jumpin' you." She admits. "It's gettin' really hard to not jump you."

I nod. We should probably wait for this.

"Um... Can you... can you handle the rest?" I ask. She nods, somewhat disappointed, but accepting that I'm just not ready for that yet.

She takes the washcloth, and I turn into the spray of water to rinse myself off before I step out of the shower and towel myself off before throwing on my pajamas. Just as I'm leaving the bathroom, I hear a low moan coming from the shower, dripping with need, and I know exactly what Faith is doing now. The thought pools between my legs, and I hurry out of the bathroom, making a beeline for my room, closing the door behind me and throwing myself on the bed. I lay there, panting for no reason, and suddenly, images of what Faith is doing in the shower pop into my mind, and I can't get rid of them.

I find my hand sliding down under my flannel pajama pants of its own free will, then under my panties. I shiver and decide to let my hand do what it wants to do as I stop fighting the images in my mind.

...

I walk downstairs to find Faith at the door with the pizza delivery guy.

"Um... yeah, lemme just..." Faith says as she notices me. "Hey, B... got any money to pay for the pizza?"

I nod as I walk over to the counter and grab the fifty dollar bill, handing it to the guy.

"Uh, your change is $30.65." The guy says, and he fishes out a twenty and a ten, handing it to me as he starts fishing for the coins.

"Keep the coinage." I say. Sixty-five cents isn't enough to really worry about, anyway.

He nods before turning to head back to his scooter, and I close the door behind him.

Neither Faith nor I can look each other in the eye for several minutes as I set the pizza down and grab a slice. I'm about to take a bite when my mouth opens for a different reason.

"I'm sorry, Faith." I say, and she looks at me in confusion.

"For what?"

"For... For... you know... Getting you all... you know, then... you know..."

"For gettin' me worked up, then runnin' away? Nah, it's alright. I understand. You're just not ready for it, I understand. 'Sides, I know it got you pretty worked up, too, so we're pretty much in the same boat."

"How... How do you know it got me worked up?"

"First of all, it's kinda hard _not_ to get worked up in that sitch, even without the touchin' and stuff. I mean, just bein' naked in the shower with someone else like that, it's pretty much a given that you're gonna be turned on. Second... I kinda heard you... you know."

My face is either white as milk or blood red right now in embarrassment.

"Oh..." I say. Finally, I decide to fill the uncomfortable silence with eating, so I take a bite out of the pizza. I ordered the meat lover's, of course. Faith had told me a while back that it was her favorite.

...

We've cleared all but, like, three slices of pizza now, and Faith closes the box before either of us can grab anymore.

"I think it's time I should tell you..." She says, and I nod, setting my plate aside, along with the crusts.

"Um... should we go sit on the couch or something?" I ask. She nods in agreement, motioning for me to lead the way.

We're silent for about ten minutes while she psyches herself up for it.

"Um... look... I think I know what you've been thinking, and I just think you should know... it's not STDs or anythin' like that. I'm not really _sick_ or anythin', and other than having nightmares every night about the... about the rape, I'm just fine... It's nothing physically _wrong_ with me, it's just..." She falls silent, and the tears are back again. "Everythin's gonna change, B. _Everythin'_. Nothing's ever going to be the same for me. And... if you stay with me... and I'll totally understand if you don't wanna stick around after I tell you this-"

"Faith, stop right there. I'm not going anywhere, so you just push those thoughts out of your mind, okay? I'm not going _anywhere_. I told you I'd be here for you, so that's exactly what I'm going to do. Because I love you, Faith."

She nods, but still doesn't look sure. "But, anyway... if you decide to stick around... it's all gonna change for you, too, B."

"Why does anything have to change? Whatever it is, we'll make it through."

"Because... I'm pregnant, B..."


	11. Chapter 11

I'm... What?

(Buffy's POV)

_"Um... look... I think I know what you've been thinking, and I just think you should know... it's not STDs or anything like that. I'm not really sick or anything, and other than having nightmares every night about the... about the rape, I'm just fine... It's nothing physically wrong with me, it's just..." She falls silent, and the tears are back again. "Everything's gonna change, B. Everything. Nothing's ever going to be the same for me. And... if you stay with me... and I'll totally understand if you don't wanna stick around after I tell you this-"_

_ "Faith, stop right there. I'm not going anywhere, so you just push those thoughts out of your mind, okay? I'm not going anywhere. I told you I'd be here for you, so that's exactly what I'm going to do. Because I love you, Faith."_

_ She nods, but still doesn't look sure. "But, anyway... if you decide to stick around... it's all gonna change for you, too, B."_

_ "Why does anything have to change? Whatever it is, we'll make it through."_

_ "Because... I'm pregnant, B..."_

...

"You... You're... You're... what?"

Faith nods, her eyes clenched shut. "Yeah." She whispers. "That was pretty much my reaction, too, when the doc told me. I'm... I'm pregnant."

We're silent for a long time as I try to figure out how to say what I need to say without things going badly.

Finally, I take a deep breath, rubbing my palms on my knees nervously. "What... What are we gonna... you know... do about it?"

"What do ya mean, Buffy?"

"I mean... What are we going to do? Are we going to... abort? Are we going to take it to full-term and give it up for adoption? Are we going to keep it? What are we going to do?"

Faith does something right then that I definitely don't expect. She smiles. And it's a sincere smile, too.

"What?" I ask.

"You said "we", B."

I smile back and pull her in for a tight hug. "Of course I said "we", Faith. We're in this together. Whatever you choose, I'm here for you."

She nods, but pulls back with a frown.

"What... What if I do decide to abort?"

I flush, heart sinking. It's not that I was looking forward to raising a child. Of course, it's not that I _wasn't_ looking forward to it, either. I'm just... I'm only seventeen, but... Anyway, it's not that I was looking forward to raising a child, but I am totally _against_ abortion. Still... Faith's been through so much already, and having the child of the man who _raped_ her might be too much for her. It should be her decision, but I'm definitely not going to be happy about it if it comes down to it.

I clench my eyes shut and sigh. "It's your decision, Faith... And I'll support whatever you choose. Doesn't mean I'll be _happy_ if you decide to abort, but I will support you."

She nods and tears up. "I'm not gonna abort, B." She says, and I can't help the sigh of relief that escapes. "I'm totally against abortion. I mean, it doesn't have a heartbeat yet, but... it's a life that's growin' inside me. I'm growin' a _human being_ inside me, B. Way I see it, I decide to abort, it'd make me a murderer. Be even worse than killin' someone out there on the streets, too, 'cause this little guy wouldn't even know what's goin' on yet."

"Faith... You have no idea how relieved I am to hear you say that." Faith smiles.

"Sorry about the test, B... I just... I had to be sure."

"I know. I get it." I smile back. "So, did I pass the test?"

"Failed miserably." She jokes, and I'm glad that the mood is light enough that we can be jokey now.

I lean in and kiss her softly. "So. Abortion is off the table. What _are_ we going to do?"

"I don't know." Faith whispers, the light atmosphere gone. "I don't know. I figure, I'm gonna see this to term, no matter what. I've got about nine months to make a final decision."

"_We_." I correct. "_We_ have nine months to make a decision. I'm serious about being with you the whole way. But if we're going to see this baby to term, then that means you're going to have to take things easy. Especially on the alcohol and smoking front."

"I don't drink or smoke, B. Don't gotta worry about that." She smirks.

"Okay, good... But... it also means no fighting, and nothing too strenuous, either. I've heard that exercise is good for pregnancy, but not to overdo it. Also going to have to dial down the junk food, and eat more fruits and vegetables. Protein is going to be an absolute must, of course. And we can't have you being too stressed out or anything, either, so we're going to have to find some way of keeping you in calm surroundings, and..."

**[Omniscient POV]**

Faith smiles at Buffy as she goes on and on about what all they would have to do to keep the baby healthy. She just watches her, not really listening to _what_ she is saying, only paying attention to the fact that she _is_ saying it, saying "we" every time. Falling more and more in love with her with each second.

Suddenly, she leans forward and silences Buffy, capturing the blonde's lips with her own. Buffy freezes in surprize, then leans into the kiss, her lips moving slowly against Faith's. Faith's tongue swipes along Buffy's bottom lip , and both mouths open as their tongues embrace each other. Buffy straightens herself out and pulls Faith down on top of her, groaning when one of Faith's legs accidentally slip down between hers, her thigh pressing against her center, which quickly responds.

Faith's smile turns to mischief, and she presses down harder on Buffy's sex with her thigh, causing Buffy to pull away and groan again, louder. It's hard for Buffy to believe that this is the same Faith that, only an hour and a half ago, was so timid and shy in the shower. Buffy loves both Faiths equally, of course, but this one has her total attention right now as she grinds herself down on Faith's leg, desperate for some friction.

The brunette shifts a bit so she's straddling Buffy's leg, and she starts a rhythm against her girlfriend, rocking her hips into Buffy's core as she grinds down on her, and soon, both of them are groaning. Finally, Faith pushes herself off of Buffy and throws herself to the other end of the couch, leaving them both trying desperately to catch their breath.

"I'm sorry." Faith apologizes. "I... I didn't mean to... I just got caught up in-"

"Faith, you don't have to apologize. I got carried away, too. Besides... I... I kind of... didn't really want to stop." Buffy admits.

Faith stares at the blonde, still breathing heavily, though now, their breathing has become erratic, and Buffy shivers as Faith's eyes darken dramatically.

"But... I... I thought you said... Just earlier..."

"I know." Buffy says. "But, um... I guess I just... I didn't want my first time to... To be in the shower." She says nervously, fiddling with the bottom button of her shirt. "Save that for later, you know?" She adds.

"You mean-?" Faith starts, but Buffy continues.

"Plus, I mean, that was before I found out my amazingly hot girlfriend was growing a new life inside her." She jokes, trying to lighten the serious mood in the air.

Faith chuckles slightly, then grows serious again.

"But... What are you sayin', Buffy?"

Buffy hesitates, but not because she isn't sure. No, she's certain, but she's worried how Faith will react.

"I'm saying... If you want to... then... I want to... too. Also, I mean. I want to... _also_."

Faith stares at Buffy for a while before nodding just slightly. It was enough. Buffy stands up and grabs Faith's hands before leading the tall brunette up to her room.

...

Buffy lays down on her bed and pulls Faith down on top of her to rest just between the blonde's legs. They kiss slowly, savoring the moment, taking their time to let the knowledge of what is about to happen sink in.

For Buffy, this is an all new experience. She'd never gotten this far with anyone before. Every second that goes by is new, and Buffy isn't at all sure how to do this. Luckily, however, Faith is more than experienced with this, so she does know what she's doing. At least, that's what Buffy's thinking. That is far from the truth, however.

Faith is every bit as unsure about what she's doing as Buffy, something that hasn't happened since _her_ first time. Ever since she first lost her virginity, Faith has been confident, maybe even a bit cocky about it. But now, she's nervous. She's nervous that maybe she won't live up to Buffy's expectations for her first time. She's nervous that she'll get too caught up in the moment and end up being too rough or fast with Buffy. She's nervous that Buffy might actually only be doing this because she feels sorry for Faith, and just wants to try to make her feel better. That last one is pushed out of her mind, however, because she knows Buffy isn't like that.

But when she pulls back and looks into Buffy's eyes, she knows that no matter what happens, Buffy's first time will be perfect, because she's hopelessly in love with Faith. And Faith feels the same way. So she wants to tell Buffy, and show her.

"Buffy..." She whispers. "I love you."

Buffy gasps and tears up at the words, and Faith is worried that she did something wrong for a minute, until the blonde pulls Faith down for another heated kiss that leaves them both seeing stars.

"God, Faith, I love you so much." Buffy whispers once she's able.

They slowly rid each other of their clothes and crawl under the blankets. Buffy lets Faith stay on top, and the brunette shifts so she's laying snugly between Buffy's legs. She lines her sex up with Buffy's, then relaxes enough to press their clits together. They both let out a sharp breath then, which turns to a moan when Faith presses down a bit harder, so their hips were pressing into each other as well.

Faith lets Buffy relax for a minute before she slowly starts moving against her, rubbing their cores together, setting a very slow pace. Buffy stifles her moans, trying not to seem too eager, but Faith smiles and slows down.

"You don't gotta be quiet if ya don't want to." She whispers and leans down to kiss Buffy passionately as she starts grinding again. This time, Buffy doesn't try to be quiet, she lets the moans fall from her lips as Faith makes her feel things she'd never thought possible before. Amazing, beautiful things. And Faith isn't even going very fast or hard.

It's a struggle for Faith to keep herself under control, keep herself from going too fast or hard, letting Buffy's sounds guide her. When she sounds desperate, Faith speeds up a little, or presses harder. When she sounds anxious, Faith slows down or relaxes the pressure a little bit.

Faith lays down a little more, relaxing her torso enough that she can focus on controlling her hips better, as they keep wanting to go faster and harder. Doing so allows their nipples to brush against each other, drawing another gasp from them both. Buffy is moaning and whimpering almost constantly now, Faith's name falling off her tongue repeatedly, and the brunette in question is loving the sound of it.

Slowly, Buffy felt a pressure building inside her, building, building, building, and the pressure caused her hips to start moving erratically as she drew closer and closer to her finish.

"Let it go, Buffy." Faith whispers in her ear. "Let it go."

And with that, the pressure is released all at once, feeling like an explosion of pleasure deep inside her, and Faith continues to grind down, hard and fast as she tries to prolong it as much as she can, coaxing Buffy's orgasm to its limits. Seeing Buffy come undone like that, knowing that she was the cause, Faith felt her own orgasm rip through her, and despite the pure simplicity of everything, and the amount of experience she'd had with sex, she'd never had a climax so intense before in her life.

Finally, Buffy comes down from her high, leaving her shaking and whimpering and exhausted. Faith sits up, pulling Buffy into her lap and hugging her tightly.

"I got ya, B. I got ya." Faith whispers, soothing her, stroking her hair as she whispers sweet nothings into her ear, and Buffy's shaking arms wrap around the brunette.

"I love you, Faith." Buffy coos.

"I love you, too, Buffy." Faith says back. She holds Buffy like that until her breathing evens out, and the blonde falls asleep, smiling happily as Faith lays her down on the bed. Faith takes up a spot on the bed next to her, wrapping her arms tightly around Buffy and quickly falling asleep holding the girl that Faith is certain is the love of her life. Something Faith had never believed to exist before.


	12. Chapter 12

I'm... What?

(Omniscient POV)

_Slowly, Buffy felt a pressure building inside her, building, building, building, and the pressure caused her hips to start moving erratically as she drew closer and closer to her finish._

_ "Let it go, Buffy." Faith whispers in her ear. "Let it go."_

_ And with that, the pressure is released all at once, feeling like an explosion of pleasure deep inside her, and Faith continues to grind down, hard and fast as she tries to prolong it as much as she can, coaxing Buffy's orgasm to its limits. Seeing Buffy come undone like that, knowing that she was the cause, Faith felt her own orgasm rip through her, and despite the pure simplicity of everything, and the amount of experience she'd had with sex, she'd never had a climax so intense before in her life._

_ Finally, Buffy comes down from her high, leaving her shaking and whimpering and exhausted. Faith sits up, pulling Buffy into her lap and hugging her tightly._

_ "I got ya, B. I got ya." Faith whispers, soothing her, stroking her hair as she whispers sweet nothings into her ear, and Buffy's shaking arms wrap around the brunette._

_ "I love you, Faith." Buffy coos._

_ "I love you, too, Buffy." Faith says back. She holds Buffy like that until her breathing evens out, and the blonde falls asleep, smiling happily as Faith lays her down on the bed. Faith takes up a spot on the bed next to her, wrapping her arms tightly around Buffy and quickly falling asleep holding the girl that Faith is certain is the love of her life. Something Faith had never believed to exist before._

...

Joyce stood in the doorway, watching the two girls sleep, holding each other tightly, and she swore, she'd never seen Buffy so happy in her life. It brought tears of joy to her eyes. Still, she couldn't help but wonder what kind of news Faith had received that was so terrible that she wouldn't tell Buffy until several days after she herself learned. Whatever it was, Joyce knew that both girls had a long struggle ahead of them. And she hoped that their relationship could survive it, but it wasn't likely for children at their age.

...

(Buffy's POV)

I wake up first, wincing at the bright sunlight streaming in through the window, but as my eyes adjust, I finally see Faith laying beside me, still sound asleep, her arms wrapped tightly around me like she's terrified I'm going to leave. She looks so vulnerable right now, and I'm amazed that I'm able to witness something so rare. I know that as soon as she wakes up, the vulnerability will be covered by a mask of bravery, and maybe even indifference.

I smile and lean over to kiss her on the forehead. She sighs, but doesn't wake up, so I just curl up in her arms and try to go back to sleep. Of course, the second I manage to do that, Faith stirs in her sleep, and I'm awake again.

I smile again at the cute little sound she just made, but the smile fades when I realize the sound was a whimper. Her eyes are clenched shut, and she's breathing quickly and erratically.

"Buffy..." She whimpers.

"I'm here, Faith." I whisper, and I kiss her on the cheek. She holds on to me tighter, and her body starts twitching.

"Please... No... Don't... Don't leave..."

"I'm not going to leave, Faith. I promise, I'm not going to leave."

"Don't leave me... Don't... Don't leave me." She hugs me tighter, and I feel tears running down her cheeks. "Please, don't leave me, Buffy." She sobs into my neck, and I know she's awake now, so I hold her tighter, too.

"I'm not going to leave you, Faith. I'm not going to leave you."

"Please, I love you. I need you."

"I know, baby. I know. I love you, too. I'll never leave you." I whisper, kissing the side of her head. My heart is breaking, hearing her breaking in front of me.

"I need you, Buffy. I need you..."

"I'm here. I'm here, baby. I love you."

She finally starts to calm down, but I don't relax my grip on her, even when she lets her arms slide down to her own sides, and her breathing returns to normal.

Finally, after about another ten minutes, I pull back and look in her eyes. They're still red-rimmed from her crying.

"Thanks." She whispers, looking away.

"You're welcome. Faith, you know I love you, right?"

She hesitates for a while before she answers. "Yeah, B. I know." She says with a smile. She starts to get up, but I pull her back down.

"Faith... I love you. I'm in love with you. I'm serious. And I'm not going to leave you."

She stares into my eyes for a few minutes before she finally lets the tears flow again, and she slumps into me, sobbing against my chest.

"I'm sorry, Buffy. I'm so, so sorry."

"For what?" I ask. "What do you have to be sorry for?"

"I'm sorry for... everything... I'm sorry that I dragged you into all of this... I'm sorry that I went and got pregnant from the rape... I'm sorry that... I'm sorry that I'm just such a fuckin' mess."

"Faith, none of this is your fault. And I wouldn't want it any other way. Yes, things could have gone better, but I _want_ to be here for you, through all of this. I _want_ to be the one to see you when you're vulnerable like this and help make you strong again. I _want_ to be your shoulder to cry on, and your cuddlebug at night."

She chuckles slightly, but I keep going.

"Faith, I don't want you to apologize for any of the stuff that's going on right now, because none of it is your fault. It is happening _to_ you, not _because of_ you. You are the victim in this, and I want to be the one who supports and protects you through all of this. You've been the tough girl for so long, Faith, and I know it's got to be hard, but you don't have to be the tough girl anymore, because I'm here for you. I'm here _with_ you. And I know that I can't possibly understand what you're going through, but that doesn't mean I'm not gonna try."

(Faith's POV)

I nod, but look down. How the hell could I have gotten so lucky? I couldn't have. This is all way too good to be true. Good shit like this doesn't happen to people like me. Everythin' else about this sitch: the rape, the pregnancy, the bein' hopelessly in love with a girl that's so far outta my league, they had to create a new league just for her... I can believe all that. That figures for people like me. But actually gettin' said "girl that's way outta my league", and, on top of that, havin' her sayin' that she's gonna help me through the rape and pregnancy 'cause she actually _wants_ to? No way in hell that's real. This is all just some hallucination that's gonna fade away as soon as I wake up, and I'll have this perfect reality torn away from me as punishment for actin' up when I was a kid.

Still... I'll be damned if I'm not gonna milk this hallucination for everythin' it's got before it fades, 'cause it feels pretty damn good to let it go, cryin' into Buffy's shoulder, and havin' her hold me this tight and tellin' me everythin' I wanna hear and more. She won't keep these promises. She _can't_ keep these promises. But it's hella good hearin' them now.

"Shh... It's okay, Faith. Let it all out." She whispers to me, holdin' me tighter and tighter with each second.

We stay like that for a long time before I finally calm down again, and I pull back, wipin' my eyes. "Should probably get downstairs."

"Yeah..." She says hesitantly. "Faith?"

"Yeah, B?"

"You know I'm serious, right? I mean... You know that I really do love you, right?"

I don't answer for a minute. Finally, though, I smile with everythin' but my eyes, 'cause I can't fake that kinda smile, flashin' my dimples. "Yeah, B. I know. Love you, too. Now, come on, your mom's probably already downstairs making breakfast."

She doesn't look convinced, but thankfully, she drops it and nods. "Most likely. Let's go, I'm starving." She smiles, and, like me, her smile doesn't quite reach her eyes. I'm so confused right now. About everything. I love this, Buffy, the whole family scene over here, even Dawn ain't too bad. But I hate this at the same time. I hate that I'm draggin' Buffy down with my bullshit, and that we're just goin' through the motions of bein' these teenagers in love. I mean, fuck's sake, of course I love her. No lyin' about that. But that's why I hate this. Because I'm in love with a girl who could never truly love me back. I'm broken, in more ways than one.

Still, even though we're just goin' through the motions, even though I hate what I'm doin' to her, and to myself, and how she's managed to worm her way into my heart and take up permanent residence there, I can't bring myself to do what I know I should. It would be better for everyone if I was strong enough to say goodbye to her, get out of her life, but I'm not. I need her. But not in the good way. Buffy's like an addiction to heroin or somethin'. You do it once, and you're hooked, and suddenly, everythin' makes ya crave it more and more. That wasn't supposed to be a sex thing, but it applies there, too.

It would be better, healthier, even, if I could stay away from her. She'd move on, find some hot number to fuck, maybe even marry one day, get into a good school, do whatever the hell she wants to do with her life, and never look back at the blip of a mistake in her life, the broken fuck-up named Faith Lehane. She'd have two kids, little boy and girl, big house, white picket fence, two-stall garage, and a dog. Probably a beagle or somethin', 'cause she's, like, in love with Snoopy. And I want all that for her. She deserves so much more than me, because she's such an amazin' girl. And all I'd have to do to give her that is to leave and not look back. But no matter how much I know I should do that, no matter how hard I try to get myself to make the hard decision, I can't do it. Because I'm addicted to Buffy Summers. And I know that, as much as I don't deserve her, and that I _should_ leave, I'm not goin' to. In fact, I'm gonna fight like hell to keep her. I'm gonna do everythin' in my power to _make_ myself deserve her.

And with that resolve firmly planted in my mind, I kiss her softly on the lips, then take her hand and lead her downstairs, where, sure enough, we're greeted by the sounds and smells of bacon fryin' in a skillet on the stove, Ms. Summers slavin' over the heat.

(Buffy's POV)

"Good morning, girls." Mom says with a knowing look thrown at me.

I blush at the look, but Faith seems unfazed by it.

"Mornin', Ms. S."

"Did you two have fun last night?"

I cough and sputter, accidentally spraying Faith with the orange juice I has just taken a drink of. "Wh-wh-wh-what?!" I cough out.

"I didn't mean anything by it, Buffy." Mom deadpans. "I just meant, you invited Faith over to talk and hang out last night, you had pizza, which you never bothered to throw the box away, by the way."

"Sorry." I say sheepishly.

Mom smiles reassuringly. "So, again I ask, did you two have fun?"

Faith fidgets, so I start to jump in to answer, but Faith beats me to it.

"Actually, I told B what I found out at the hospital. It's... it's not good, Ms. S. But, I figure, Buffy's decided that she wants to stick around and help me through it, so you deserve to know, too." Faith takes a deep breath and closes her eyes to summon the courage while my mom watches her, waiting.

"Faith, you don't have to-" I start, but Faith shakes her head to silence me.

"Yeah, I do, B. She's been nothin' but supportive, even though we started off on the wrong foot. Even though I'm pretty much the guy every parent dreads their daughter bringin' home, she's been supportive and open, so she sure as hell deserves to know what her daughter is gettin' into."

Mom and I both stare at Faith in profound shock and awe as she continues to gathe her nerves.

"Ms. Summers... You know that I was raped. Well... it's affected me in more ways than one. One thing, the doc says that I've got some case of minor PTSD or somethin', 'cause I keep havin' nightmares about it, and it's made me nervous to be physically close to pretty much everyone. But that's not the main thing. The main thing goin' on is... Well... the guy that did it... he didn't exactly use protection, and, well..."

"Oh my god..." My mom gasps, and I stare at Faith in surprise. I actually didn't think she'd do it. I thought she'd change her mind at the lsat second and just stick with the PTSD thing. But my heart swells at the fact that she was able to gather the courage to actually tell my mom.

"Yeah... That's the sitch, alright... The bastard kinda left somethin' behind for me. I'm... I'm pregnant."

My mom is speechless as her eyes dart back and forth between me and Faith. Faith starts to panic when she sees my mom's reaction, so I move closer to her and put my hand on her back in support.

Finally, my mom clears her throat to reply. "I-I-I-I... I, um... Oh..." She stops and takes a deep breath. "What are you planning to do about it?"

"I'm not going to get an abortion. Like I told Buffy, I don't believe abortion's right. It's just... wrong, in my opinion. I mean... little guy growin' inside me had nothin' to do with what happened to me. He's the result of what happened to me, not the cause of it. Wouldn't be right to punish him or her because of what his father did to me. So... I know I'm gonna carry this kid to term, but beyond that... I don't know."

My mom nodded, and I can tell she's relieved about that. I get my profound distaste for abortion from her, for sure.

"I mean... I hope you're okay with that... I'm not gonna abort whether you're okay with it or not, but... I hope you're okay with it, 'cause I really need help with this, and... I just..."

"You need Buffy." My mom says, nodding in understanding.

"Yeah..." Faith admits after a beat, looking down. My heart soars, despite the seriousness of the situation. Faith _needs_ me! I wap my arms around Faith and kiss her sweetly on the lips.

"I'm not going anywhere, Faith." I whisper.

"Neither am I." My mom says, wrapping her arms around us. "Faith, for what it's worth, I know it's going to be hard. For you and for Buffy. For all of us, really, because I know how much you mean to Buffy. So seeing you hurt hurts Buffy, and, by extension, me as well. But I do believe you've made the right decision."

"Thanks, Ms. S." Faith whispers, and relaxes into mine and my mom's arms, even hugging us back. "I... I don't know what the hell I did to get this, but, fuck, whatever it was, I thank god I did it."

"I think it had something to do with you pouring your heart out to me outside the girls' bathroom in front of the entire school." I joke, and Faith chuckles.

"Yeah... Must be it."

My mom steps back and looks at us in amusement. "I'd like to hear that story." She says as she turns back to breakfast. I sit down at the counter, because I'm of no use at all when it comes to cooking, but Faith steps up and starts doing something with flour and the bacon grease.

"Hope you don't mind." Faith says to my mom.

"Of course." She says, smiling.

"I didn't know you could cook." I say in surprise.

"Yeah, it's just... It's somethin' the fosters suggested I do when I got frustrated or somethin'. Kinda like stress relief to keep me from goin' off and doin' somethin' I'd regret. First time I tried it, I almost burnt down the kitchen, 'cause I had no idea what the hell I was doin', and I didn't realise you were supposed to actually _flip_ the bacon every couple of minutes. But then, Linda gave me some pointers, and i just started figurin' things out for myself after that. Got pretty good at it fast. Fact, actually been thinkin' about goin' to culinary school after High School."

"That sounds lovely." My mom says, impressed.

"I thought you wanted to be a social worker?" I ask.

"Yeah, there's that, too. But I've heard it's good if you've got a backup plan, too. I mean, I've heard both ways, like, if you've got a backup plan, you're not 100% devoted to your "Plan A". But I lean more towards the whole backup plan thing, and, for me, culinary seems like a decent backup plan to me." Faith explains as she pours a bit of milk into the pan with the bacon grease and flour, stirring it all together with a whisk.

"I think it's a wonderful plan. Both of them, actually." My mom says, and I shrink where I sit. My mom's been bugging me a lot lately about having a plan after high school.

"What about you, B? What do you wanna do?" Faith asks.

"I... I actually don't know." I admit. "I mean, I've never really been... passionate about anything. I really don't know what I want to do."

"Well, knowin' you, you could probably do anythin' you wanted to do, s'long as you've got the means to do it. Hell, even if ya don't have the means to do it, you're stubborn enough, you'd _find_ the means." She adds a bit more milk, and a little more water. "Hey, Ms. S? Could ya get me the salt and pepper, please?"

"Oh, yes." Mom says as she fetches the salt and pepper.

"Thanks." Faith says, and salts the... whatever she's doing. I can't really see from my angle, but I don't want to get in her way. She sets the salt down and shakes some black pepper into it, stirring constantly with the whisk.

"My, Faith, that smells good." Mom says, and I have to agree. Still can't see it, but it does smell good.

"Eh, nothin' special. Just somethin' Linda taught me how to do. Figure, it's the least I could do to repay you for the way you've been to me."

"Oh, don't mention it. I'm just sorry that someone as young and full of life as you is having to go through all of this."

"I deal. Helps to have awesome support, though. I mean, you and Buffy are just... amazin', and the fosters are doin' everythin' they can to help me. But still... with everythin' goin' on in that house... I mean... Everyone's always lookin' at me with those _eyes_, ya know? The pity, like "Poor Faith, no one say anythin' to her about it, because she's broken. Everyone be nice to her." I just can't take it sometimes? I mean, yeah, in a house with six foster kids, it's nice to be the center of attention once in a while, so ya don't feel invisible. But now, no one ever lets me have any time by myself, there always has to be someone with me, 'cause Linda and Carrie are afraid I'm gonna do somethin' to hurt myself. And that means that I have to deal with those pitying judgemental eyes everywhere I go... So... I guess... I just wanna say thanks... I mean, I don't get those eyes around here. I mean, I'm not invisible here, but it's not like everythin' around here is centered on keepin' me from breakin' down or freakin' out. I feel more at home here, I guess, is what I'm tryin' to say. And... yeah, just... thanks."

My mom wraps her arms around Faith again, but Faith shrugs her off.

"Sorry, just... I gotta keep stirrin' this, or it'll burn." She explains, and Mom chuckles.

"I'm sorry, I just got swept up in the moment."

"Nah, it's alright. I mean, don't mean to sound presumptuous or anythin', but you actually kinda remind me of my own mom."

"Well... thank you..." Mom says, a tear in her eye. Faith nods, but focuses on what she's doing.

"There... that should do it." She says as she turns the burner off under the pan she's using, then moves it to a cooler burner.

The oven beeps, and my mom opens it to pull a tray of large biscuits out, setting the cookie sheet on a pair of pot holders on the counter so the counter top didn't scorch.

"I could do toast." I suggest, wanting to fill the silence with something, even if I know my mom's going to say no. I'm not the best cook around. Even toast comes out of the toaster pretty much near ash when I'm the one using it.

"No, honey, this'll be fine." My mom hurries to say, as per my prediction. I smirk, and Faith looks curiously at us.

"Why not? Toast sounds pretty good to me."

"We won't have toast. We'll have bread-shaped piles of ashes that somehow manage to hold themselves together." My mom counters, and I shrug. It's become a joke between the two of us that I can't cook.

"Yeah, my most successful cooking experiment was when I tried to boil an egg."

"And what did you do wrong that time?" Mom jokes, and I blush.

"I forgot to put the egg in the pot, and the water all evaporated."

"And...?"

"Set fire to the stove."

"Which you then...?"

"Tried to put out with the sink sprayer."

"Which was a bad idea because...?"

"It was an electric stove."

Faith is near hysterics now as she wipes tears of laughter from her eyes. Mom and I both start laughing, too, and it all just feels so natural, I can easily see it being this way for the rest of our lives. Of course, there'll be the absence of a certain mom once Faith and I get our own place, and- Wait a sec? Am I really actually planning to move in with Faith? Or, rather, get our own place together with her? Come on, we're only seventeen! I mean, I only _just_ turned seventeen! I'm still in the sixteen-and-a-half-year-old Buffy frame of mind!

Mom and Faith both seem to realize my bewilderment, because they turn to look at me in confusion.

"What's up, B?" Faith asks.

"Oh, nothing, just... I was thinking... Damn, we had marshmallows. I could have made s'mores." I deflect the question. Mom and Faith both start laughing again.

"Damn, B! And that was your _most_ successful cooking experiment?!"

"Yeah." I admit. Because it's actually the truth. The worst one... Ugh, it gives me the heeby-jeebies just thinking about it.

"What was the _worst _one, then?" Faith asks. Again, heeby-jeebies.

Mom turns away and shivers, but she chuckles under her breath as she busies herself getting plates down for the three of us.

"Oh... uh... Well..."

"Come on, B. How bad can it be?" She asks.

"Creature from the Black Lagoon..." I mutter under my breath.

"Come again?"

"Oh, it's... um... Well, the thing is, I was trying to make soup. Because you can't go wrong with soup, right? All you have to do is heat up water and throw some meat and vegetables in it. Well, I screwed _soup_ up. It came out all black and syrupy, like tar. Anyway, I didn't actually realise that it was that screwed up at first, because I was just having fun trying. Well, I reached into the cabinet to grab the salt, and I grabbed it, and the salt shaker fell into the soup on accident... only it wasn't the salt... it was a mouse, and the little guy swan to the surface and climbed out of the pot, looking like the Creature from the Black Lagoon. It terrified the hell out of me. And that's not the worst bit... the mouse barely got five feet away from the pot when it just curled up and died... and not because it drowned in soup."

Faith's eyes grow wide, and she bursts into laughter again.

"Oh my god! You poisoned a mouse with _soup_?!"

"Yeah..."

"Babe, I love you, but don't ever cook anything for me, okay?" She jokes, and I blush. "I'll handle all the cookin', okay? Hell, if I have to, I'll be the domesticated housewife!"

We all freeze at that, and Mom and I stare at Faith. Faith looks back and forth between us nervously.

"I-I-I-I... I don't... I don't know why I... why I said that..." She stammers.

She's definitely panicking right now, and so am I, but we can't both panic about it, so I stand up, walk over to her, and pull her in for a searing kiss that quickly makes us both forget about the awkwardness. Until we pull apart, that is, though the tension is significantly less than before.

"Are you asking me to marry you?" I joke, trying to ease the tension a little more. She laughs, and I join her, though our laughter is more in relief than humor.

"Yeah, B. I'm only seventeen years old, but I really wanna marry you already, so..." And just like that, the awkwardness is back.

"You... Do you think about stuff like that, Faith?" I ask.

She takes a deep breath. "On occasion." She admits. "I-I mean... nothin' serious, like I'm just gonna run right out and buy you a ring or somethin'. But... one day... I'd like to be able to call you my wife..."

Out of all that, there is one word I notice she _didn't_ say. Maybe. She didn't say "maybe". She didn't say "_maybe_ one day", she said "one day". Meaning she doesn't see it as a possibility, she actually _wants_ it. And I think... I think I do, too.

"Hmm... Buffy Lehane..." I try out loud, to see how it sounds. I mean, I'm _seriously_ trying it out. Not in a joking manner or anything. "Buffy _Summers-_Lehane..." I try the hyphenated version. I've actually always wanted to become a hyphenated-last-name type of person.

She smiles. "Faith Summers." She fires back. "Faith _Lehane_-Summers."

Just then, Faith's phone rings. She picks it up and answers.

"Hello?... Yeah, I'm Faith. Speaking?... Wait, what?... You... You have?... They did?... You-You mean... Okay, thanks, uh... I'll be down there real soon... Bye." She hangs up and slips her phone in her pocket, then darts up the stairs. I chase after her.

"Faith?!" I call. "What's going on? Who was that? What was that about?"

I get to my room to see her packing up the stuff she brought with her last night.

"Doc called me." She answers. "'Pparently, they got the results back on the DNA test. B, I'm gonna find out who raped me." She looks me dead in the eyes, and my breath catches. I nod, and I help her finish packing up.

"You know I'm coming with you." I say. It was _not_ a question.

"Yeah, I know. Hurry up, okay? Think your mom would drive us?"

"Yeah, lemme just go tell her what's going on."

"Right." Faith agrees.

* * *

**Sorry for the long wait, guys. I'm really caught up in writing my new Pitch Perfect story: Straying From Tradition, so I find it hard to focus on anything but that right now. I am not abandoning you guys, though! So, this chapter is a peace offering. No, it is not a tease, in the next chapter, we **_**will**_** find out whether or not Mark is Faith's rapist, or if it's someone else. So, just for fun, who do you guys think it is? The first one to get it right gets to decide how justice is served to said rapist. There are two choices (for the rapist's justice, I mean): Option A: They go to court, and his fate is determined by the jury, or Option B: His justice is a bit more... **_**personal**_**... In the form of one of the characters (I decide who) deciding to take justice into his/her own hands. Tell me your guess about who it is and which punishment you want in a review! If you're a guest user, then try to come up with an original name or something to put on your review so I can specify which of you won, please.**


	13. Chapter 13

I'm... What?

**AN: TRIGGER WARNING: Flashbacks to Faith's rape.**

(Buffy's POV)

_Just then, Faith's phone rings. She picks it up and answers._

_ "Hello?... Yeah, I'm Faith. Speaking?... Wait, what?... You... You have?... They did?... You-You mean... Okay, thanks, uh... I'll be down there real soon... Bye." She hangs up and slips her phone in her pocket, then darts up the stairs. I chase after her._

_ "Faith?!" I call. "What's going on? Who was that? What was that about?"_

_ I get to my room to see her packing up the stuff she brought with her last night._

_ "Doc called me." She answers. "'Pparently, they got the results back on the DNA test. B, I'm gonna find out who raped me." She looks me dead in the eyes, and my breath catches. I nod, and I help her finish packing up. _

_ "You know I'm coming with you." I say. It was not a question._

_ "Yeah, I know. Hurry up, okay? Think your mom would drive us?"_

_ "Yeah, lemme just go tell her what's going on."_

_ "Right." Faith agrees._

...

"Doc?" Faith asks as the doctor comes into the room, and I squeeze her hand. Faith's step-moms and I are the only other ones in the room. My mom and Faith's step-siblings are all outside.

"Um... Miss...?" The doctor looks at me.

"Summers." I answer.

"Summers, then... Miss Summers, perhaps it would be better if-"

"No." Faith interrupts him. "She needs to... I... I want... I need her here." Her hand squeezes mine tightly, and I squeeze back to let her know I'm not going anywhere.

The doctor sighs. "Alright then... We have the results back from the DNA test we ran on the semen found in your-"

"I get the pic, doc. Just give it to me straight, please. Who did this to me?" Faith asks, clenching her eyes closed.

The doctor opens his mouth to answer, but Faith interrupts him again. "Wait..." She turns to Linda and Carrie. "Um... could... Could you guys... please... leave?" She asks, and they wipe tears from their eyes, hurt, but they nod and walk out of the room. Faith turns to them. "I... I don't want them to see my reaction... If it's... If it's who I think it is..."

_Mark Hartman._ I think. The name tastes bad even in my _brain_ at the thought that he might have done this to Faith.

"I understand." I say, squeezing her hand a little tighter.

She nods, then turns to the doctor. "Alright... I'm as ready as I'm ever gonna be."

The doctor nods. "Are you sure you want to know, Miss Lehane? Once you know, it's possible that your nightmares will get worse."

"I... I need to know... I need to know, so I can take the son of a bitch to court." Faith says with fire in her eyes, mingling with the tears of something other than fear for once. The tears this time are of pure rage.

The doctor nods. "The DNA tested to be that of one Marcus Hartman."

"Marcus?" Faith asked.

"Mark..." I growl.

"No, Buffy..." Faith whispers. "Mark's name is Mark, not Marcus... Marcus is... His dad..."

I look at her in confusion as the gears turn in my head.

_The guy who raped Faith was... Mark's dad? As in... "I'm on the City Council" Mark's dad? Marcus Hartman?_ Oh crap... Faith's rapist is on the City Council...

"Well that's a helluva game changer." Faith growls.

"No it's not." I say, getting the attention of Faith and the doctor.

"B-"

"Faith, this doesn't change a thing. Well, it does, but the only thing this changes is the name of the man we're going to send to prison. We'll still take this guy to court, and now we have DNA evidence to prove he did this. We're going to take this guy down, Faith, and then you'll have the satisfaction of seeing him in handcuffs."

She closes her eyes and takes a deep breath. "Alright. We can do this."

"Yes we can." I agree. "And we will. Marcus Hartman won't even know what hit him."

...

Faith and I are sitting together at lunch when her leather-clad friends, along with Will and Xander, sit down with us. Faith looks at me and nods.

"Hey, Faith. Long time, no see." Jason says. "You been sick or somethin'?"

"Or somethin'." Faith agrees. "Look, I need to talk to you guys about my attack. There's a lot of shit goin' on right now about it, so you guys probably need to know what's goin' on, in case the cops show up at your door or somethin'."

"What are you talkin' about?" Jack asks. "Why the cops?"

"It wasn't just a muggin' was it?" Jason asks.

Faith shakes her head. "No." She closes her eyes and takes a deep breath.

"Faith, it's alright. You don't have to do this." I whisper.

"Yeah, I do. They deserve to know, B." She opens her eyes and looks at her friends. "It wasn't a muggin'. Didn't have anythin' on me worth stealin', anyway. And everyone in this fuckin' town _knows_ I don't got anythin' worth stealin'. In that alley... some guy knocked me out... and he raped me."

Everyone, even Willow's eyes grow wide. Willow already knew about it, because I talked to her about it, but I know from experience that it just sounds so much more... _real_ when you hear it from the mouth of the victim.

Jason slams his fist down on the table and growls, drawing the attention of the attendant and all the other students. A glare from him and the other knights in leather armor causes everyone to turn back to their own business.

"There's more..." Faith says, and they all remain silent. I squeeze her hand reassuringly. She looks at me and nods, sighing. She turns back to the guys (and Willow). "I'm pregnant. The son of a bitch got me pregnant."

Willow gasps. That was the part I haven't told her. The rest of the guys, including Xander, put on expressionless faces, but you can see the rage in their eyes. They're almost as rage-ful as Faith's.

"Who was it?" Jason asks.

"I can't say." She answers.

"Faith, who the fuck was it?"

"I can't tell you."

"Who was it?!" He whisper-yells to convey his seriousness, but not so anyone outside of our group could hear.

"I can't tell you!" She whisper-yells back. "I got the DNA test results back, but we're not gonna handle this the way we handled those douchebag jocks who beat the shit outta me last year. We're doin' this the legal way. We're goin' through the system."

"You can't trust the system, Faith! What's the system done for us in the past? Huh? What's the system done for _you_?! The best home you've been in so far is the one you're in now, and they only took you 'cause you could babysit and they wanted your brother!"

"I know that!" She growls. "But the system brought me here to Sunny-D, and so far, my life here hasn't been all that bad. I've got a group of awesome pals, super-hot girlfriend, and almost everyone at this school is too scared of me to mess with me. Besides, way I have it figured, the system is the only way to really hurt this guy. He's high up there, Jase. And he owns the system. Which is why I'm gonna beat him at his own game. Somethin' like this comes out, his career, his entire fuckin' life is gonna be ruined. 'Sides, pull this off, send him to prison, the inmates there'll take care of the beatin' the shit outta him bit. Inmates don't take kindly to child molesters. I mean, may not be a child anymore, but I'm not exactly of drinkin' age yet, either."

"So... guy that did it... he's a blue-collar?"

"Yeah." Faith confirms.

"Fine. Won't do anythin' to him. But Faith, come on, you gotta tell us who it is. Who fucked you up?" Jack asks.

Faith stands up and grabs him by the collar, slamming him down on the table.

"Faith!" I stand up next to her and put a hand on her shoulder.

"Do I _look_ fucked up to ya, Jacky? Huh?! You wanna be takin' that back, _buddy_?!" She growls. The attendant is making his way over now, and everyone in the lunch room is staring at the scene.

"Kind of. Yeah." Jack admits. "Look at you, Faith. You're slammin' your own friends around like they're the bastard who did it. We're just fuckin' lookin' out for ya, like you've done for us, Faith. We're your friends. Let us help you out, for fuck's sake."

She clenches her eyes shut and takes several deep breaths. The attendant pulls her away.

"Miss Lehane, to the principal's office. Now." He says.

"No." Jack says, standing up. "It's alright. She's just goin' through some shit right now. I said somethin' I shouldn't have, and she just reacted. She's fine."

The attendant looks back and forth between Faith, who's struggling to control her breathing, and Jack, then nods, letting go of Faith. "Fine. But this is just a warning. Next time, Lehane, and I'm not gonna let you off."

She nods, and I pull her down to sit next to me. Her chest is heaving, as if it's a struggle just to breathe.

"Faith?" I whisper. "What's going on?"

She shakes her head, and her face turns green. She stands up suddenly, then runs away, towards the bathroom. The guys and I all follow her, but only Willow and I go into the girls' bathroom after her.

When we find her in one of the stalls, she's bent over the toilet, retching. It seems like every meal she's ever eaten is ending up in the porcelain bowl. I sit down next to her and pull her hair back to prevent her from vomiting on it, and Willow and I both rub her back in concern. She starts to calm down a bit, and when she finally stops puking, she flushes the toilet and curls up into my arms, sobbing. Willow watches Faith break down in astonishment.

"What's wrong, Faith?" I whisper.

"I... I remember..." She whimpers, and my arms tense and tighten around her. "I-I-I wasn't... I wasn't unconscious..."

"Faith..." I whisper, trying to calm her down.

"I... I-I-I remember him...I remember him pushin' me down, and... I was stunned... I couldn't move, like I-I-I-I was... paralyzed, or somethin'... And I... I remember his voice... he was... he said..."

"Said what?" Willow asks.

"Said... don't make a noise, or it'll be worse for you... Then... I remember him... I remember him pinnin' my arms down and... He took off his belt and... and tied my hands down to a dumpster, and..." She starts sobbing so hard I can't make anything else out, but my own rage is bubbling to the surface.

"He's never going to touch you again, Faith." I whisper. "If he does, I'll cut his fucking hands off. To start with. Then I'll cut his dick off for even thinking he could do it again."

Faith shakes her head. "No... He's strong, B... And fast... He'd end up hurtin' you. No, we're goin' through the system. That's what we're goin' to do, we're gonna go through the system. Hit him where it really hurts. I... I remember more."

"You don't have to-" I start, but she interrupts me.

"Yeah, I do... My... My shrink says talkin' about it might help... 'Sides... I can't say this shit again... Not in front of other people. Not in front of a jury and shit... I'm... I'm gonna need you to say it, B. Tell them what I tell you..."

I nod, tears flowing from my eyes. "Okay... I'll do it..."

She nods and continues. "He... I... I remember him rippin' my pants off... and..."

**[Flashback (Faith's POV)]**

_I walk down an alley I use every day goin' home from the arcade after school. I know this alley. I use it every day. Nothin' ever happens in this alley. It's _my_ alley. I trust it. I know every inch of it, 'cause I'm the one that covered it in graffiti. I'm the one who drew the fake chalk outlines of bodies, just for the hell of it, 'cause I thought it was funny. Plus, it kept other people out of my alley. I'm the one that stacked those crates over there as steps leadin' up to the fire escape, so I could get to the roof of the building I'm walkin' next to. Nice place to watch the sun rise or set, dependin' on my mood. Wouldn't admit it to the guys, 'cause I've got a bad-ass rep to protect, but I like to watch the sun rise and set. It's calmin'._

_ I'm the one that welded a small metal box down in the corner of the inside of that dumpster, and cut a door in the outside of it, makin' a secret compartment in the back of the dumpster where I hide my comic books. Not that Carrie and Linda would care if I had comic books or not, it's just a habit. Livin' in that little kinda orphanage in between foster homes, kids' personal things tended to go "missin'" if another kid took an interest in it, so I always hid my comic books._

_ Like I said, I _know_ this alley. Hell, I practically _built_ this alley. I come here, and up to the roof of that building when I need to calm down. It may seem stupid, talkin' about an alley like this, but it's like a sanctuary here._

_ And my sanctuary has just been invaded, defiled._

_ Out of nowhere, some guy jumps out at me from behind the dumpster where my comic books are hidden._

_ He pushes me against the wall of the opposite building, next to where my makeshift staircase to the fire escape is. I hit the bricks hard, and fall to the ground, stunned by the surprise attack. I look up and see him fiddlin' with his belt buckle, then slide it out of the belt loops of his jeans. I can't see his face, 'cause it's too dark out, but there's enough light to see his teeth as he grins at me._

_ "Don't make a noise." He says. "Or it'll be that much worse for you."_

_ He drags me over to the dumpster and uses his belt to tie my hands to the leg of it. He looks ahead of him, then back behind him, to the ends of the alley. My alley. No one's there._

_ I've never been one for fantasies, but right now, I really wish that one of the dozens of superheroes in my comic books, stored only feet away from where my hands are tied down, would come alive and save me. Somethin' else gets me, though. I wish Buffy were here. She's not like other sun-dress girls. She's kind of bad-ass herself, and I know she'd kick the shit out of this guy if she was here. Tears spring to my eyes when I feel him rip my pants off. Literally. The denim tears. The bastard is strong. I can feel my strength returning, and I struggle against the belt, but it's leather, and it's brand new, so it's not givin'. I'm helpless. I try to kick at the guy, but he pins my legs down with his shins on my thighs. He pulls out a knife and cuts my panties off, then holds it to my throat._

_ "Stop fighting, or you'll die." _

_ I've always imagined myself to be the girl who'd fight tooth and nail when some guy tried to force himself on me, and I'd come out on top, too. But it's amazin', and terrifyin', how quickly my fight was lost when I felt that cold blade on my throat, and instead, I just start sobbin' uncontrollably. He shoves my own panties in my mouth as a kind of gag to muffle my cries, and he unbuttons his jeans, then pulls them down, along with his underwear._

_ I've only ever slept with girls before. Never a guy. Even when my old babysitter tried to rape me, I still fought him off, though I was the one with a knife then. So I've never had some guy inside me. Never been much for toys, either. So when I see the size of this guy's dick, I start cryin' even harder, knowin' that not only am I about to be violated in the worst way possible, but it's gonna hurt like hell, too._

_ He's already hard, but he strokes himself a little to get himself even harder. As he does, his other hand rips my shirt down the front, and he pulls down my bra, and starts squeezin' my breasts hard. I know it's gonna bruise._

_ I wish I could black out right now. I wish he'd just knock me out right now, and make it easier for both of us. But no, somethin' tells me he's done this before. Somethin' tells me he gets off on seein' girls like me cryin', keeps them conscious through the whole thing. I think if I'd been knocked out against the wall when he hit me, he'd either have waited for me to wake back up, or he'd have just given up and left. Either way, this wouldn't be happening right now._

_ He's finally satisfied with how hard he is, and no sooner does he line himself up with me, and he's thrustin' in hard and fast. He pins my hips down with his hands as he tears through that barrier inside me that I haven't broken, even though I'm far from being a virgin._

_ I scream out loud, but my scream is muffled still by my own panties, and he laughs as he doesn't even take a moment to let me adjust. He just pulls back out almost completely and slams back inside me with a sickening slap as his hips connect with the back of my thighs, my legs draped over his waist, and my hips still pinned down as he pounds me._

**[Flashback End (Return to Buffy's POV)]**

I wipe my tears away with my sleeve, then I sob into Faith's shoulder. Somehow, I could actually _feel_ her fear as she told me everything she remembered.

"And that's all I remember right now." She says emotionlessly. It's like, as she told that story, she became numb, like if she'd allowed herself to feel it, she'd have died from the emotions. Willow has her arms wrapped around her knees, rocking back and forth as she cries. I hug Faith tighter than ever before. "Buffy... I know it's gonna hurt... but you're gonna need to tell the jury all of that when the time comes. Because I just... I can't say that shit again."

I nod. "I will. I promise, Faith, that'll never happen to you again."

* * *

**Let me be clear, I do NOT advocate for rape. I am 1000% against it, and I would beat the shit out of someone if I saw them trying to rape anyone. I just wanted to clear that up here, in case anyone was thinking I support it. And if anyone else is wondering, no, I myself have NOT been raped before, so any inaccuracies in how Faith is reacting to her situation can be blamed on my lack of experience. I hope it's accurate, though.**


End file.
